


Don't you think this is getting awkward

by yukiisama3



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe, Awkwardness, Best Friends, Bisexual Tyler, Cute Ending, Denial of Feelings, Dom Josh, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Sex, Friends to Lovers, I Will Go Down With This Ship, I'm Bad At Tagging, Jenna is a sarcastic bish, Josh works at a hotel ok, M/M, Mild S&M, Name-Calling, No Plot/Plotless, Off-screen Relationship(s), POV Tyler, Pet Names, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Rough Sex, Shy Tyler, This Is STUPID, Tyler's Adorable, Tyler's pov, Why Did I Write This?, jealous josh, long story, past self-harm
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-28
Updated: 2017-04-06
Packaged: 2018-05-03 16:09:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 42
Words: 59,202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5297687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yukiisama3/pseuds/yukiisama3
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Every morning Tyler suffers awkwardness after disturbingly, inappropriate dreams of his own best friend.</p><p>Josh happens to think Tyler's adorable when he gets all flustered and awkward. He also happens to find Tyler cute...in every way...</p><p>Tyler also finds it hard to handle when Josh suddenly starts to flirt with him?</p><p>"Your so cute, I just want to cuddle you all night."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Their Called Night Terrors Not Fantasies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You're really cute in the morning."

**_"Ohh! Fuck, right there! Josh!"_**. Another messed up dream.

 

I quickly shot up, dripping with sweat, panting slightly, obviously waking up the man in the same bed next to him, "Dude, are you okay? This is the third time you did this in the last five days," Josh said to me in concern, he sat up and wiped off the sweat from my forehead with his shirt, then he felt my forehead, "you feel like you are running a fever," I blushed, _Why does he have to be 5 inches from my face and touch my forehead after that damn dream!_ "Tyler, what's wrong with you? Lately you have been making noise in your sleep and then wake up like this." I turned my head towards the man I saw kissing my neck and touching me ya know... There...

"Um, Josh could you get me a glass of water?" I asked, I needed to change my boxers, As soon as he nodded his head and left the room I immediately changed, I got back in bed and not 10 seconds later did Josh come back with water, I'm lucky to have a friend as nice as he is to me, the only thing was those non-stop dreams and Josh constantly makes sure I'm okay, which often resulted in Josh being really close to me and rubbing my back, as far as he knows I tell him it's night terrors. After a while of laying in bed talking, he fell asleep, His head was close to my neck I could feel his breath on my neck, then he suddenly moved, I knew he was asleep, he was snoring faintly.

 

His head was now buried right into my neck, his arm was laid on my chest and his knee... His damn knee was on my crotch, every time his leg moved it would rub against me, hot breathes in my ear didn't help much either, I shut my eyes and fell asleep so I could avoid awkwardly moaning in front of Josh, Waking up in the morning was usually peaceful most of the time Josh would still be asleep, This morning was different.

 

I woke up and still felt Josh was in the same position as when I went to sleep except his head wasn't in my neck, I turned my head and found out Josh was watching me sleep, "You know... You're really cute sleeping," I raised my eyebrows and blushed lightly, I was going to get up until Josh stopped me, "Tyler, can we just stay like this for a bit?" I nodded my head, "Sure, I guess." I didn't get why he would want to stay cuddled into me, we stayed like this for about a half-hour, we got up, got dressed, ate breakfast. You're probably wondering why we sleep together in the first place, Josh insisted we should sleep together so he could calm me down when I would have a 'Night Terror' I did my daily routine until I finished also today happens to be the day me and Josh are going to his parents house for dinner.

" I already met them millions of times, but they always ask Josh to take me with him and say I'm a good influence. During the car ride Josh laid a hand on my thigh, I looked over at him with a strange look on my face. "Dude, what are you doing?" I didn't get an answer from him so I just let it go. After a long silence, he parked the car in the driveway and the first thing that came into sight was his sisters drench in water in T-shirts... Josh caught it in is sight instantly."

" We got out of the car and the girls ran towards us Abigail hugged Josh and Ashley jumped on me and wrapped her legs around my waist, this took me and Josh into shock, mostly just Josh, I hugged her until she got off and she smiled at Josh. "You didn't tell me you were bringing this cutie with you!" Josh glared at her, then suddenly grabbed my hand, "he's not for you Ash," With that, he walked me inside, "Mom, Dad, were here." I smiled politely at his parents, Laura hugged me and Josh, Bill hugged Josh and shook my hand as usual, "You haven't been here in a while, Joshua. Let alone, Tyler," I love Josh's mom, she always treated me like a son and makes cookies for us when we come to visit. "

"Josh said he would be right back and told me to wait in the living room, when he got upstairs Ashley snuck up on me and put a hand on my shoulder. "Hey Tyler! Wanna come hang out with me and Abby for a bit?" I gave her a sorry look, "I'm supposed to wait for Josh. He went upstairs to see Jordan." I told her sincerely. "Tyler, he's more than likely going to get high up there. Beside you see him all the time, what about me and Abby." She did have a point, I do live with Josh in his house and never see her or Abigail. Josh wouldn't mind much, right? I got up and left outside with Ashley. I didn't know Josh would get really mad..."

I sat up seeing Josh walk through the back door and stop when he saw me with the girl's laying the in the grass. The look on his face is a particular one I haven't seen since 2 years ago. Josh looks at me angry. He has never really been mad at me, it's just part of his good-natured personality. Ashley sat up along with her sister and looked at Josh walking towards me. Abigail smiled slyly and tapped my shoulder when she caught my attention she looked at Ashley. Ashley gave me signs and I followed them. We all stood up and when Josh got in front of me, his face turned in surprise. Because we all split up and ran for it. Normally I would be mature about this and talk to Josh but hey, sometimes you need to have some fun. We had our own spot me and Abigail use for an escape plan.

 

We goofed around for a short time until Josh found us. Abigail got away, I wasn't so lucky. Josh threw me over his shoulder and started walking away. "I told you to stay in the living room and then you ran away from me with Ashley!" I pondered about those words Josh had said. "I went outside I didn't run far away and why do you hate it when I'm near Ashley?" I asked. He stopped for a moment and then continued to walk back to the house. "I don't know It just pisses me off seeing you with her." I started wondering,

 

 _'Does Josh like me?'_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FYI: Ashley likes Tyler, but they don't date.


	2. Little Lie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler doesn't understand why Josh constantly gets jealous over his own sister. Or why he never answers particular questions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of the chapters are short...

I was so embarrassed. Josh carried me inside the house right in front of his parents and his brother. "Oh my!... Joshua why are you carrying Tyler? " I heard Laura say. "Josh, are you two... Together?" Bill said, right after Laura. "I thought you guys already knew Josh was gay." I lifted my head and turned it so I could see Jordan standing there. "Hold on, Josh your gay?" I questioned. Josh didn't answer, he just nodded to his parents I don't think he expected his parents to smile and be happy for him. "Well then why doesn't you and Tyler go to your old room until dinner is ready, okay?" at that moment I tried to get myself off Josh's shoulder. "Ouch! What the hell was that for?!" I complained after feeling Josh pinch my hip. "You're not going anywhere." For once I was a little scared of Josh. His voice was a bit more dominant then is the usual sweet voice. 

 

I felt a rush go through my body with each step closer Josh got to his room door. Finally, he walked in and threw me on his bed. "Josh! Please don't do any-" I stopped talking after Josh put his hand over my mouth. "I'm not going to do anything to you." Josh said, taking his hand away from my mouth. He wasn't lying, he didn't do anything but lay next to me. I looked at Josh, he was so relaxed, his arms were used as a makeshift pillow. I couldn't help but look at the exposed part of his abdomen and V-line. I forgot Josh was looking at me. By the time I had realized I was staring at the exposed parts Josh already had a smile spreading across his face. "Tyler, are you straight?" I looked up from his abdomen and saw that heart-melting smile. "Not exactly... I'm bisexual. Why?" I couldn't help but continuously glance down at his abdomen. "Because I can see you looking at my stomach. And by the way your face looks, you're enjoying it." I blushed and looked down at the bed. "I'm not interested in you." I denied any feelings I had right now whatsoever. 

 

"I think your lying" Josh sat up and placed his hand my cheek. He was so close I could lightly feel his breath on my face. "And you wouldn't let me this close to you if you didn't feel anything for me." Josh was right, I wouldn't let just anyone be this close to me. Most of the time if we would get stuck staring at each other it would get awkward. But this time it felt right. 

 

"Josh! Tyler! Dinner is ready!"

 

Josh took his hand away and smiled. "Come on, Mom doesn't like waiting." With that, we went downstairs and sat down with the rest of the Dun's. "So Tyler, I hear you and Ashley have been sneaking around together." Laura said to me then Ashley glared at Josh while speaking. "Yeah, me and Tyler are pretty good friends. You know he accidentally kissed me earlier." Josh glared back. "Are you sure it was an Accident or did you throw yourself at him?" Abigail looked up at Josh. And I assume she kicked him because I felt the table move a little. "No, but by my guesses you tried to get him in bed with you." Ashley told Josh. I watched in shock finally understanding what was going on. 

 

'They're fighting over me?'  I looked at Laura and she looked back at me in just as much surprise. "Ash, I don't need to get him in bed" Josh looked at his plate and calmly took a bite of his steak and everyone was anticipating on what he would say next. Especially Jordan. Then he looked up at Ashley and smiled. "I already sleep with him in the same bed for what two or three months now?" Everyone turned silent and looked at Josh, I sunk down in my chair feeling embarrassed again. The way he plainly admitted to it without an ounce of shame... 

 

Ashley got up, walked over to me and pulled me up by my arm. "Tyler, would you please come out back with me?" I didn't object. I took my plate and walked out back to Ashley. I heard Josh scoff when I got out the door. 

 

"Tyler, we need to talk about Joshua." 


	3. Frustrated

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A few small accidents never hurt anyone.

I came back in after talking to Ashley about Josh. She told me that she liked me a little bit more than she should and if it was okay if we were still friends even though I now knew that. Obviously I said yes to her She is my best friend's sister after all. When we came in Josh looked displeased, Abigail flashed a quick smile and his brother was just waiting for something to happen. "Tyler, would you mind staying the night here? You would be sleeping with Josh or Jordan. Whichever you prefer." Laura asked politely. I nodded at her and then I saw Josh's displeased look face into a small smile. I looked over at Josh and quickly answered. "Mrs. Dun, I'll be sleeping with Josh as usual."

 

I played video games with Jordan, went swimming with the girls, watched a movie with Josh's parents. And now I'm tired. I slowly walked into Josh's bedroom and just fell over on his bed. Before I could sleep, Josh came in he looked frustrated and he didn't quite notice I was in here. He looked out the window and sighed, I hate seeing him like this I like it when he smiles. "Josh, are you okay?" I startled him and he turned around quickly. "Oh, it's just you. I'm okay, Ty." I knew the smile he flashed at me was fake. I rolled my eye's and grabbed his arm. He looked confused when I pulled him close to me and the bed. "Take off your shirt." I said flatly, his eye's widened in shock. "Um, why?" I rolled my eye's in annoyance. He stretched his arms while yawning and took my chance to pull his shirt off. "Tyler!" Of course I did a quick run through of checking out his muscles and then went back to my idea. "Lay on your stomach on the bed." Now this really grabbed his attention. He gave me a strange look, but still laid down like I asked. "Tyler, what are you trying to do?" I heard the small, hence of nervousness in his voice. "Stop being a baby and relax."

 

With that I got on the bed right next to Josh. Sitting on my knees, I began to give Josh a massage. I heard a sigh of relief from him and massaged the areas with the most tension. "Ty, you know you don't have to do this right?" Josh's voice was now calm and collective. "You can't walk around frustrated. You have a lot of tension in your lower back and besides, I want to do this for you." Josh hummed lightly. "Your such a cute and sweet guy. No wonder Ashley likes you so much..." I took my hand away from is back and stroked my thumb lightly against his cheek. "I don't have a love interest in her. She doesn't know me the way you do." After that I went back to massaging Josh. I didn't stop until Josh was so relaxed he fell asleep. I smiled and pulled the covers over me and Josh. 

 

* * *

 

 

It was so weird waking up in the morning without a strange dream about Josh. Instead, I woke up on top of Josh with his arm around me. My head was laid on his chest along with my hand. Then I noticed one of his hands were playing with my hair, knowing this I teased Josh by running my hand down his torso. I felt Josh slightly shiver beneath me. But he must of thought I was still asleep because he kept messing with my hair. So I went to extreme measures of teasing I moved my head enough to where I was on his torso. Josh still didn't know I was awake yet. Until I licked upwards on his abs then I looked up at him. "Morning, Josh." Josh's face was pure red and his mouth was slightly gaped open. 

 

"What did you just do?!" Josh asked. I smirked, then played clueless. "What this?" I said, then licked his abs a couple more times. I heard a soft moan come from Josh. "Tyler, Don't do that!" Josh then sat up quickly. "Why? Did it turn you on?" I wiggled my eyebrows laughing. I stopped after Josh suddenly pinned me down at the foot of the bed. "It only turns me on when a really cute guy does it..." I then returned the soft moan when Josh sucked and bit at my neck. When the door flung open me and Josh froze. "What the fuck." Josh's brother Jordan said. Looking at Josh on top of me, his head only inches away from my bruised neck and one of my hands gripping his shoulder and the other on his chest. 

 

"Jordan, there's a twenty dollar bill hidden in Mom's favorite vase."

 

"I saw nothing."

 

I chuckled over Josh bribing his own brother. He got off me and we both sat there in awkward silence. Something could of happen, but it didn't happen. Josh cleared his throat and before he got his chance to speak, I placed my hands on either side of his knees, leaned in and kissed his soft lips. After leaving Josh speechless, I left to see what Laura made for breakfast. 

 

Josh just sat there frozen in utter shock. 


	4. Show If You Won't Tell Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashley steps in and a few more nights at the Dun's house with the surprise of Josh?

"Is Josh up this morning or is he sleeping in like usual?" Bill asked me, I leaned against the counter holding a plate of fresh made chocolate-chip pancakes and bacon. "He's awake. Doing something." Then I saw Jordan sit at the table giving me an odd look. "Hey Tyler, are you an item with my brother?" He asked flatly, I ate a strip of bacon watching Abigail sit down. "No, were just close friends." As I continued to eat Ashley walked into the kitchen and stood in front of me. I raised my eyebrow at her seeing her eye's latched to my neck. "What are you looking at?" I asked, forgetting Josh had left two visible hickey's that I made no attempt to hide them. Ashley grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room. She opened her make up bag and looked for foundation. "Ashley, what are you so freaked out about?" Then I looked in her body mirror. 

 

"Oh my god!"

 

I brushed my fingers across the soft, bruised parts of my neck where Josh's lips once were. "I'm going to cover it up so mom and dad don't raise question's. Did Josh give you those?" She asked, carefully brushing foundation on my neck. "Yeah... I kind of let him." She didn't seem happy with the answer I gave her so I decided it would be better to leave her alone. I reached for the door handle until she grabbed me by the waist hugging me. "Tyler do you like me or Josh...?" I never thought about if I liked Josh but I know I'm not into Ashley. "I'm not sure about Josh. I'm sorry to tell you that I'm not interested in you, " I said while taking her hands off my waist. "I'm sorry Ashley but your my best friend's little sister." I turned around and saw her start to cry. "No Ashley, don't cry! We're still friends!" She smiled at those words and opened the door for me. I smiled, looking back at her while leaving her room. Then I bumped into someone. 

 "Josh! Uh, h-hi!" I don't know why I was so nervous seeing Josh like usual. "Did you just come out of Ashley's room?" I heard his voice raised slightly at me. My eyes trailed down from Josh's face to his half-naked figure. His boxers were hanging a little lower than most of the time. I could see his hip bones. Awkward silence happened again. My mouth opened, but the words didn't come out only a few "Uh's" and "Um" came out. Obviously flustered by Josh's body I felt my face heat up when my eyes got to his boxers. Then I looked back up at his face. "Well, did you?" He pressed on, the last um came out of my mouth before I turned around and went back to the kitchen.

 "Tyler, your face! It's all red." I didn't expect it until Laura brought me into the bathroom and sat me on the tub side. She pulled out a thermometer and stuck it in my mouth. "I'm fine r-" She interrupted. "Tyler, shut up and let me check your temperature." I didn't expect her to be so motherly towards me. She took it out and read it off to me. "103 Tyler, I want you to go lay down in Josh's room. I'll bring you soup in a few minutes." I listened to her and did what she said. As soon as I laid down I thought about what could of made my temperature go up so fast. I felt fine then I found out how it raised. 

 Josh came in along with his mother he didn't even bother to put on clothes. This seemed normal around here due to nobody telling him to put on any clothes. The heat raised back to my face again. I sat up and Laura gave me soup, then she kissed my forehead like my mother would. "Get better honey. I'll check on you in a few hours. Josh watch over him sweetie." She patted my shoulder and left. I couldn't help but smile at how much she thinks of me as family. "Tyler, you know we're staying here for a few more days right?" I shook my head and my somewhat  _'Fever'_  didn't get any better with Josh sitting on his bed right in front of me. I couldn't help staring at his well taken care of muscular figure. "How are you feeling?" Josh asked, breaking me from my stare. I placed the soup on the night stand "I don't have a fever I feel normal." Josh smirked at me and then started to get closer. "Then why is your face burning up." I stared at him and the same thing that happened to me earlier happened I couldn't speak again. 

 

"Do you think I can't see you look at my body whenever you get a chance."

 

I looked at his smirk and suddenly felt his hand under my shirt touching just above my hip. I didn't push him away for some reason I liked the feeling of Josh's hand touching my skin. "Strange, it's not only your face that's hot..." His hand went up to my chest. His other hand tugged my shirt up I watched his eyes look at my abdomen and up to my chest. "Your whole body is hot." I already knew Josh wasn't talking about my fever. He took my shirt off and gave a satisfied hum. "I should of agreed to stay a few nights here if I knew I could take you with me." Josh said, "I never thought it would be you I would care about the most."

 I laid my hand on his cheek. "I could say the same thing to you..." I saw his bright smile while he leaned his head into the palm of my head. "Then why won't you tell me you love me?" I saw a longing and a bit of desperation in his eyes. "Josh, if I say it would it mean anything if I did it because you asked me to...?" Josh looked down and then back up to me. "Then when your fever goes down, show me instead." Then he got up and left without another word. I think I'm starting to understand my own feelings... 

_I think I'm falling for my best friend..._


	5. Eyes For Thoughts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Josh, we can't do it here."

After a few times of Josh's mother checking on me the heat from my face went down so she finally said I wasn't sick anymore. Not like I was before...  I took a nap of course, those sex dreams of Josh were only getting more intensified every time. It seemed so real strangely this time I enjoyed in the dream and reality. And the real Josh was enjoying it too. Before I knew it, I woke up and stretched my arms. I looked to my side and saw Josh crazily blushing. "What's with that look?" I asked cautiously. "Y-You had a sex fantasy about me... don't deny it. I heard you moaning my name." The look I saw on that man's face only meant one thing. 

_That motherfucker was watching me sleep again!_

"You're still as cute as usual when you sleep." "I swear to god if you watch me sleep one more goddamn time..." I saw that playful look on his face. "Your gonna what? Your skinny little ass couldn't take me down if you were on steroids." I threw the covers off and jumped on Josh knocking him down. "You little shit head. I'll show you!" With that me and Josh were laughing and giggling while playfully wrestling. It got to the point where we were rolling around on the bed trying to pin the other person. 

We froze when Josh had me on his cross-legged lap with his arms were tightly wrapped around my waist. My arms were stuck between his arms and my sides and my legs were freely laid beside Josh's hips. I thought about this and starting becoming aroused knowing Josh's dick was right beneath my ass at the moment. Out of every time we had awkward moments this was my number one. I jerked backwards trying to get out of Josh's strong arms. I shouldn't of done that because I grinded against stomach and moaned. "Whoa, Tyler, where did that come from?" Josh was entirely clueless about my "problem" so he didn't know what was going on. 

Wearing boxers and rubbing against Josh on accident only felt good. After Josh had said that I leaned forward, pressing against Josh and starting grinding myself against him for some type of pleasure. His tight grip loosens so I wrapped my arms around his neck and laid my head on his shoulder while grinding against him. Josh knew what was going on when he looked into the mirror hanging on the wall revealing my pleased face. And hearing another moan, then he felt it. He felt my hard twitch against his stomach. Everything right now was turning me on. Feeling his muscular figure against me with his arms wrapped around my waist. 

His soft cottony red hair touching my cheek fuck even the way he smelled was absolutely irresistible. Josh has never been so hot before I just wanted him so bad right now. I think Josh knew I wanted him soon enough, I stopped moving over a new feeling. Josh had his hand inside my boxers stroking my aching arousal while he began to suckle on my neck. I was moaning right next his ear digging my blunt nails into his shoulder blades. 

The more he touched me the louder my moans would get. His thumb continuously rubbed the tip of my dick while he stroked it. "You sound so fucking hot moaning in my ear like that." I moaned loud enough for the whole house to hear Josh didn't care he wanted them to know I was only his. "J-Josh if you keep doing this I'll-" I didn't even get to finish my sentence before he sped up. And somehow had the perfect movement that had me in tears of ecstasy. I surprised Josh by managing to pull his boxers down far enough in his cross-legged position to reveal his massive cock. 

I didn't care if we didn't have lube or a condom at the moment. I pulled his hand away took off my boxers and slowly entered Josh's dick into my entrance. Josh buried his face into my neck with a soft moan. Usually when I'm with a man I would wince or cry a little without any lube. But this was different with Josh I didn't do either of those things. I waited a moment before going up and back down on Josh's dick. He grabbed my hips and helped me move up and down. Moans filled the room along with Josh encouraging and saying dirty things right in my ear. I started going down harder and just when I thought it wouldn't get better he rubbed against my prostate. "Fuck, Josh!"

He started stroking me again. "How does it feel having my cock in your tight little ass?" Josh said seductively in my ear. I moaned in response and left tears on Josh shoulder from being overwhelmed by pleasure. I felt him twitch inside me he gripped my hips so hard bruises would be there tomorrow. He released inside me and that's all I needed to cum all over his stomach. We both panted and gasped for air after doing this. 

Josh smiled, watching me lick my own cum off his abs and then I lay on my back. "Damn you looked so hot, licking my stomach." I smiled back and I'll I can say is he might think that is hot. But seeing Josh's muscles all sweating with his hair sticking to his forehead is sexy as hell. I sat back up and ran my fingers down his toned abs and down his upper arms. "So sexy." I muttered under my breath. 

Josh laughed softly, he laid down and pulled me down next to him. "This is pretty selfish of me, but if you ever come home with signs of another man... you'll get it so hard." I snuggled into Josh's neck while he pulled the covers over us. "By any chance does that mean we're together?" Josh nodded his head and securely wrapped his arm over my waist. "Hey Josh." I pressed a kiss to his neck, then rolled over on top of him. 

 

"Can we do it again?"


	6. I Just Want You To Confess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler couldn't ask for anything more embarrassing than the stares of Josh's family...

 

 

I woke up next to my lovely new boyfriend. Josh was flipped on his stomach hugging a pillow it was just so cute I took a picture. I smelled Josh's mother's delicious pancakes in the kitchen and carefully got up to prevent waking Josh up. I started to notice Josh fantasies didn't come as often after getting closer to him. As soon as I threw on some random clothes I walked into the kitchen gaining looks from everyone. Then I remembered how loud me and Josh was last night. 

I didn't expect it, but his mom and dad smiled at me rather than look at me weird. "If nobody else is going to say it, then I will. Tyler, we all heard you fucking my brother last night!" Ashley said, everyone looked at her in displeased except Jordan. He was just sitting there on his phone. "Ashley, you shouldn't say that to him it's not a big deal. I think they would be cute together." Abigail said cheerfully. She smiled at me and got up. Laura smiled too, she didn't seem to mind it much. "Tyler is good for Josh."

I'm still a bit embarrassed over being confronted first thing in the morning. And knowing we probably kept everyone up all night... Abigail asked if I would like to hang out in her room to avoid any more questions from Ashley. I agreed and kind of finding myself being a bit girlie with Abigail. We lay on her bed talking about dreams and guys until it got serious to where she was telling me all her problems as I comforted her. 

"I'm so glad Josh met you, you're just the kind of friend I need." I smiled at her words and then saw the door open in my peripheral vision. "Tyler?! Why are you in my sister's room?" Josh questioned seemingly calm. "Oh, hi Josh, me and Tyler were just talking. It's a girl thing, you wouldn't understand." Josh gave me an interested look. "Tyler baby, can you step out for a second?" I stepped out of Abigail's room, shutting the door behind me and heard them talk about me. 

I raised an eyebrow in wonderment of why Josh would talk to Abigail about me then well... me. When I heard what they were talking about I fell back against the wall ready to die of embarrassment. I told Abigail I wouldn't care if she told people what we were talking about because I didn't think anyone would ask. "Now, about those night terrors... what did he say about them." I heard Josh ask Abigail, I covered my face in shame hearing her response. "Josh, they're not night terrors he just has re-occurring sex dreams of you, you big dummy."

Everything went dead silent in the room. I sprung up and rushed to the living room where Jordan and Laura was. "Hey, since you have been kind enough to let me stay here for a few nights. Is there anything I could do to help?" I said. Really, I'm only doing this so I can get away from anything Josh might say about those god forbidden dreams. "Actually, yes, do you think you could run an errand for me?" Laura asked. I nodded my head frantically, seeing Josh walk out of Abigail's room and walk towards me. As soon as he was only a few steps away, I grabbed that list and car keys out of Laura's hand so fast she dropped the TV remote. 

I ran outside in a desperate attempt to avoid Josh. She gave me the keys to her car and I got in there fast enough that all Josh could do was look at me through the window. "Where's he going?" Josh asked, Jordan looked over at Josh with a weird face. "He went shopping for Mom, he's really strange. When he saw you he started speaking fast and ran out the door." Jordan replied, unsure of the situation. I took my time in K-mart gets what Laura put on the list. 

It took me about two hours due to some of the stuff being in different stores. When I got back Jordan helped carry in groceries and asked about Ashley's strange behavior towards me. Josh was in the kitchen which I could see down the hallway. He glanced over at me and got up. Knowing this would result to him talking to me about those dreams I told Jordan, I will play video games with him. Once again, before Josh could talk to me, I ran up the stairs with Jordan and into his room. This took another 2 or 3 hours before we stopped playing games. 

I made sure Josh wasn't in the living room before going down stairs, then made sure he wasn't in his room so I could change into something more comfortable. I walked in and heard the door shut behind me. "I know you have been avoiding me." I turned pale not wanting to look at the man behind me. "We need to talk." I was forced to turn around and see Josh looking at me with his arms crossed. 

"A-About what?" I stuttered, I backed up a bit. "Is there something you might want to tell me." I shook my head at Josh's question only to be greeted by his hands on my shoulders. Josh grabbed my hand and made me sit on the edge on the bed while he stood right in front of me. "Why do I need to say anything when Abigail already told you." I tried easing my way through this. "Because I want to hear everything from you and I sure don't appreciate your cute little ass, avoiding me."

"Just... Just don't get weirded out. Yes, I did have fantasies of you for over the two months we slept in the same bed..." I whispered. Josh smiled and leaned down to hug me. I never like saying things that make me embarrassed, but Josh always makes me do it knowing it's the right thing to do. 

 

_"That only means you were mine a long time ago, Tyler"_


	7. Small Steps

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just have to throw something cute in here.

After Josh confronted me he didn't leave my side the whole day. To be honest... It was really sweet having him go everywhere with me. Sometimes he would grab my hand or hug me from behind. My favorite part of the whole day was when we went out to the mall. When we came out of the food court and some guy made fun of me with his friend over how I held onto Josh's arm. I frowned and was gently pushed to the side by Josh. "Stay here." With Josh saying that, he walked up to man and I watched from the distance.

Before I could tell what was going on Josh had already hit the man's face. His friend stood there speechless. A woman who was next to me with her daughter caught this and she looked at me. "Do you know him?" I smiled and pointed at Josh. "That's my boo." I know Josh heard me because I heard him chuckled. Her daughter couldn't of been older than 6 and she grabbed my hand. "Do you like cupcakes?" I picked her up smiling at the little angel. "Yes, I do." She gave me a small bag with a cupcake in it. "That's for you!"

She smiled and I put her down and saw Josh looking at me with a heart-melting smile. "Come on sweetie, your brother just came out of Hot Topic." I raised an eyebrow and turned my attention to a teenage boy with multiple pierces come out. He actually looked more scary than when Josh is mad. "Yay! Big brother's back! Bye-bye Mister." I waved the girl goodbye watching her run into the arms of her brother.

Her mother followed behind. Then Josh came up to me. "What was that about? Aww, did Tywer make a new friend?" I playfully pushed Josh back acknowledging his childish voice. "Why don't you go play on the monkey bars, Josh." We both laughed while going back to the car. When we drove a half a block from the mall Josh starting being serious. "Tyler, I noticed how good you were with that girl."

I didn't really expect him to say that or what he was about to ask me. "Oh, uh, I wanted kids when I thought I was going to marry a girl." Then he looked at me with a mischievous smile. "Think about what you just said." Josh told me, I raised an eyebrow at him and questioned his words. "What? That I thought I was going to marry a-" _Well, fuck._ I blushed and turned my head towards Josh in a slight panic. "I didn't mean it- wait! I don't mean it like that. Um, I meant you, me, I-" Josh laughed at me being flustered over something so dumb.

"Then what exactly did you mean?" I noticed Josh made a turn down a forest trail which I assume nobody's been there in ages. Suddenly he parked the car and turned his attention to me. "I meant... I um, I don't really know anymore..." I sighed and felt a pair of lips on mine. Josh pulled away before me and spoke. "If we were married, we would adopt a beautiful little girl and I would take care of you both because I love you."

Josh had me almost in tears. I don't know how I could deserve someone like Josh. Maybe I would end up with him I wouldn't mind it one bit. "Then let's pretend we are." I smiled sheepishly looking down at my hands. I didn't expect him to respond so calmly.

"Guess were married then."

I looked at Josh and he got out of the car. "Wanna take a walk with your boo?" I laughed softly while getting out after Josh. "So then you were listening to me and those girl's conversations?" Josh grabbed my hand and we walked down on the trail together. "Yeah, I wanted to make sure you weren't saying anything bad about me, you know, like most marriages do." I playfully pushed Josh's shoulder smiling. "You are such a loser."

Josh stopped and hugged me. "You're a loser too. If you ask why, it's because you're dating a loser." I leaned up and kissed his cheek.

 

_"If I'm a loser too, then your stuck as my boo."_


	8. Read all about it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's nothing personal that Tyler just happens to write one word each day to describe his feelings. Next to those words written in his journal, are further into his own emotions.
> 
>  
> 
> Nothing stays a secret forever...

After I came home with Josh we both left each other's side as he went to the kitchen and I went to his room. I did my normal routine, come home and simply write down my feelings. It helps me cope with my issues, when I finished writing, I slid it under the pillow where I temporarily slept each night.

I left my journal there. Without thought of anyone finding it, I left the room, noticing Josh walk in after I had left.

 

Josh lay on his stomach with his leg bent towards his back, lying opposite of the pillows and then turned on the TV. He watched a few episodes before he moved his legs and his foot touched something under the pillows. He raised his eyebrow and sat up, then checked under the pillows to find a regular notebook. "I don't remember this being here." He shrugged and opened the book and saw 'Tyler' written at the beginning. Josh smiled until he read it. _'April 2, Depressed: Why does everyone say they like me and then hurt me? April 3, Scared: Those dreams are getting worse I feel bad that Josh has to deal with me. April 4, Terrified: Josh insisted I should sleep with him so he could calm me down when I awake at night. I'm sorry, Josh..._

With every word Josh read he felt concerned and desperate to have his boyfriend tucked safely under his arm, smiling, he should but shouldn't of read the journal. He put it back and frowned, understanding how his always smiling cutie must be feeling, disorganized, scrambled, depressed and unsure. It's funny how he could be fooled by a smile.

 

"TYLER!" I heard Josh scream my name, I really didn't want to see Josh I looked like a mess at the moment. My eyes were puffy and red along with my messed up hair and free flowing tears. "Coming!" I yelled back, opening the bathroom door and holding my head down while opening the bedroom door.

 

My rational side told me everything wrong with me, while my normal side told me how bad I really am. I kept my head down so Josh wouldn't be able to see my sullen face. I tried my best to make myself seem happy "Yes, Joshie?" I heard the noise of Josh getting up. "You're upset I can tell." He lifted my head from the back of my hair and I gasped from the new feeling. I wasn't sure what was going on, Josh backed me up against the wall and kissed my neck. "J-Josh, w-why are you doing this...?" His tongue traced the back of my ear making me shiver. "I'm going to make you scream, every little dirty thought I had about you since we met is one thing, but getting to fuck you is another. My reason is simple, I want you to know how damn much I need you in my life."

 

I swallowed and felt his lips on mine. Then he lifted me up and laid me on his bed, I whimpered seeing Josh open a drawer. "I think you'll enjoy what I got for you... Take off your clothes." I did what Josh said and took off my favorite outfit and then looked to see Josh is holding something, I wasn't sure what it was.

 

Josh rubbed lube on his fingers and played around with my ass, every movement he did inside me caused my body to squirm and moans come out of me. I panted as Josh took out his fingers and kissed my inner thigh, his fingers were replaced with something a bit cold. "Josh, what is--Ooh!" Josh placed it so it was on my prostate, I started feeling it vibrate as I arched my back and instinctively closed my legs. "You look so good right now, I can't wait to taste you." Josh purred into my ear.

 

Soon enough Josh pulled the vibrator out looked at me, I panted heavily and Josh parted my legs again and I moaned again feeling Josh's tongue enter me. "Fuck, Josh!" His tongue rubbed against the same spot the vibrator was. A tear left my eye being engulfed with pleasure, his tongue was so warm and wet in me.

 

"J-Josh I'm gonna--" before I finished my sentence, Josh stopped and began sucking my cock until I came in his mouth. And he was right, he did make me scream. "Fucking Jesus, Josh!" I rode out my orgasm with those words.

 

Josh sat on his knees and admired what a mess he had made me, my chest heaved up and down with every shaky breath along side my pure red face. "You were such a good boy for me Ty, maybe next time I'll do something even better." Then he left me losing my soul to my so far best sexual encounter with Josh, he winked at me and walked out.

 

_"If I'm going to die, let it be from an overdose of pleasure from Josh."_


	9. Just a Small favor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler's secrets spill into Ashley's hands. To keep his secrets safe what could she possibly want in return?

I fell asleep after me and Josh's events. Josh was saying he would come back later, assuming he left somewhere. I didn't know I left my notebook which I'm positive Josh read... The words were a bit smudged as if someone had rubbed their finger on them accidentally.

I woke up shortly after I fell asleep feeling someone leaning over me. "What the--Ashley?" I questioned seeing her evil smile, her hands behind her back came forth and then I felt something fall on my chest.

"You really should learn not to leave your things on the kitchen counter."

I gave her a questionable look, then it struck me. I saw my journal laying on my chest and sat up. "Did you read this?! How far did you go?!" I flipped out, Josh  didn't read to the end or he would of questioned me. "Every. Last. Detail." I swallowed hard, I wrote every feeling I've had for almost a year in that notebook.

"So, about your other half, by the way I see things you must be trying to fool Josh of how happy you really are. Not saying you don't love him or anything but I do quote "If I was truly happy would Josh even be here?" doesn't sound happy. Oh, and the fact you wrote about your depression and anger that I'm sure Josh doesn't know much about... I give you an admiration for how well you can fake happiness."

I spoke through gritted teeth. "Where are you getting at?" I asked, Ashley smiled deviously like she knew what she wanted. Josh opened the door and stopped at the sight of Ashley close to me. "What's going on in here?" Ashley looked at me and smiled and whispered in my ear. "Talk to me in my room after dinner or I'll tell Josh." She then left, Josh sat down on the bed and watched my normal features changed to a frightened face. "Sweetheart, what's wrong? Did Ashley do something?"

"Babe, I'm fine, I just... I'm just going through something... Personal." I choked out, Ashley is reading my stuff and threatening to tell Josh I wasn't entirely happy. Not because of him, I'm in love with Josh but I just can't help but still feel sad.

"Baby, you know you can tell me anything right? I'll never judge you." Josh was very sincere, he gently pushed me down, got on on top of me and buried his face in my neck. It wasn't a sexual gesture, he was just being sweet and cuddled trying to make me smile. He nuzzled into my neck with his stubble tickling my neck, I giggled and my legs squeezed against Josh's hips. "Josh!" I squealed, Josh smiled against my neck and pulled his head away. "The last time your legs ever squeezed my hips this hard was on our first time." I relaxed after Josh stopped nuzzling me and watched him snake his hands up my shirt and run his hands down my bare sides.

Now this was a sexual gesture... That I kind of liked... Okay, that was a lie, I liked it more than I should. "Well, not to be a brag or anything, but my boyfriend is hot as fuck and makes it feel like the first time every time." Josh smirked, he drew small circles on my waist and kissed the underside of my jaw. "Really? Mine is so cute I can barely keep my hands to myself when he's just lying there on my bed begging for it."

I bite my lip and realization hit me, I do need to tell Josh about everything, but I feel like he would leave my depressed ass. "Hey, I don't think we can do this, your mom has dinner almost ready." Just as I said that I heard her call everyone for dinner. "You better have your ass ready for me tonight if you're really going to make me wait." Josh growled, I pulled him in for a sweet apology kiss. "I'm sorry baby, you know I would love to be yours right now, but I have stuff to do after dinner." Josh nodded his head, he got off me and before he got up Josh caught me off guard and slipped his tongue in a surprise kiss.

I knew I really should of been going to the kitchen with the rest of the Dun's, but I ended up making out with Josh. Instead of our usually only a moment make out sessions, this one was slow and there was no lust only love it was very sensual and sweet. Time flew by before we knew it Abigail opened the door. "Awww, are the lovers going at it again?" Abgail teased, Josh quickly pulled away and looked at Abigail standing in the doorway. "Haven't you heard of knocking?" Josh pointed out, she smiled and gave me the peace sign. "Well, I came in here to see why you weren't at dinner and I found my reason. FYI: You're so cute together!"

I got up wiping the saliva off my bottom lip and told Josh I would be back in a few minutes. I opened Ashley's room door and saw her on her bed in her panties watching Netflix. "Oh, there you are Tyler, I was afraid you wouldn't show up." She said, she then stood up and my eyes left from her face to her panties. "U-Um, so, uh--what was it then you wanted so you would keep my secret s-safe?" I really don't see Ashley as more than my best friend but I don't understand why seeing her panties was a bit cute...

"You." I choked hearing her words, did she really just say that? "E-Excuse me?!" I blurt out. "I said, you, I want you. Just a one time thing and a lifetime of secret depression safe." Ashley told me while she walked closer to me, her hand laid on my chest. "Ashley, you my boyfriend's sister! I can't--" She quickly spoke another line out of my journal. "Death is an option, life isn't. I would prefer an option, then a have to." I sighed, then did the most regrettable thing I will ever do, I leaned in close and started to make out with Josh's sister.

She was fully into it, I felt uncomfortable. But what other choice do I really have? Either way I'll end up losing Josh, him finding out I'm not entirely happy with our relationship and feel like shit, or fuck her sister and him finding out. I felt her fidgeting with my belt buckle and I quickly took a step back and covered my mouth.

"I'm sorry Ashley, I can't do this with you, especially cheating on Josh. It's not the same feeling I get with him..." I saw her stare at me strangely as I ran out. I burst into Josh's room and quickly wrapped my arms around his neck. "I'm sorry!" Josh raised his eyebrow at me in confusion. "What are you sorry for, Ty?"

Tears streamed down my face as I broke down in Josh's arms. "I made out with your sister..." I could tell Josh already forgave me due to his smile and well, I was more sad and emotional then he was about it. "Okay, Tyler, calm down and start from the beginning." Josh said, he sat me on the edge of the bed next to him and softly stroked my cheek with his thumb. "I-I--I write down my personal life in a notebook...And your sister threatened to tell everything in the book to you!" I sniffled, I didn't notice how I was telling Josh EVERYTHING in the book until I told him I wasn't entirely happy with him and how I suffer depression. 

I realized I had told him everything in the journal from start to end. Now I'm waiting on him to dump me.

"Tyler..."

Long pause. "Y-Yeah...?"

"That doesn't change my feeling for you. I'm glad you told me so now I can try better to make you happy."

I wiped off my tears off and looked deep into his dark chocolate eyes. He managed to make me smile again and I couldn't help but throw my arms around his neck and kiss him.

"I love my redhead."


	10. Question

I cried for almost 47 minutes unable to forgive myself for even considering messing around with Ashley. Josh forgave me saying that the kiss didn't mean shit other than Ashley trying to put pressure on me.

When I did stop crying Josh told me to stay in his room while he went to confront Ashley. I nodded my head and sat on his bed waiting for him to return.

I could hear them yelling at each other since she was right next to Josh's bedroom. I again, assumed, this also happens often since nobody went to complain about the yelling.

"Ash, you're not supposed to try to sleep with MY boyfriend!"

"Does he even love you? Or actually know you?" Ashley said, way too calmly. She was so confident in her words that she didn't need to yell, cause she knows Josh is sensitive on the subject of me.

I continued to listen until she said that and Josh became quiet, I heard the door open and slam close. The presence in the room was tense, Josh's facial expression gave off a hurtful look as he looked at me. "Tyler... Why did you agree to date me?"

"Cause I love you and well, your kind of the only person who makes me feel better than I really am, so I guess I'm trying to say... You're the best thing I got right now and I don't want to lose you." I made him smile and then I felt his lips press against my cheek. "You know what, fuck Ashley and her words, I know you better than she does." I nodded my head and rubbed my cheek where Josh had kissed me. "You don't usually do that." I said confused. "Yeah, well it's hard not to love on you sometimes." Josh replied quietly, I raised my eyebrow unsure what exactly he meant. "You're allowed to do that type of stuff whenever you want silly, that's what relationships are about."

Josh rolled his eyes at me and I scoffed at him for doing so until I heard him speak again. "I don't think I'm allowed to do what I really want to do to you in front of everyone at dinner." I blankly looked at him for a split second and burst into laughter. "Now that I think about it, get in the car were going somewhere!" Josh never takes me anywhere during visits with his family so this is bound to be good. I raced out the door like a child would and got in the car, fastened my seat belt, I was ready with excitement. I saw Josh casually walk out the door laughing at my childish act.

When he got in he didn't bother to put on his seat belt, he just started the car and left. "So where are we going?! Is it fun? Is Taco Bell involved?" I questioned, Josh looked over at me and grinned. "Nope, but it's really fun." I started thinking of many fun things we could do. To pass the time Josh brought up my journal. "I'm curious... Why would you write everything in a journal in the first place?" He questioned. "It's the only thing I can really let myself go when doing. Writing words aren't pointless unless you make them pointless, the words I write in that notebook mean something to me they're my aspect of life. Sometimes when I write I get an idea for a song or something I need to fix." Josh sort of understood what I was talking about. His face softened into a look of understanding there was some things I can't tell him or anyone really.

It probably seems girlie that I write my emotions on paper, but sometimes it's for the best. "Well Tyler, I'm not stopping you if it helps that much." The face I made when Josh parked us at our house made him chuckle. "Josh, this is our house... The only fun things we are here eating and TV." Josh patted my thigh and got out of the car. "Come on Ty, I swear it's fun and I can't do this alone." I groaned and got out of the car. "Fine... If it makes you happy I will." Josh actually looked excited about TV for once, which is unusual. Why couldn't he watch TV at his family's house?

Either way I went in the house and sat in Josh and I's favorite position. We watched some movie called The Pyramids and I sat on Josh's lap with his arms around my waist. Then we watched another movie called 30 first dates. After the movie was 39 minutes in Josh's head was on my shoulder extremely close to my neck. This is exactly what happened on the first week I slept in the same bed with Josh (First chapter jsyk) except his hands were wrapped around my waist. I didn't know Josh's true intentions


	11. It's fun to make landlords mad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler is one hell of a noisy person

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, it's been a while... a long while, I took a break from writing and then I got a comment from someone that literally warmed my heart enough to where I wanna start writing Tweny One Pilot's ff shit again. Please excuse that I'm a bit rusty after that long break and enjoy.

After another _wonderful_ night with Josh I woke up to the door sounding almost like someone was destroying it with a boulder. "What the fuck was that?" I heard Josh grumbled from beneath me. "Someone's at the door, I think." I said not really thinking about how aggressive they knocked. I rolled off from Josh's body, even though I wanted to stay cuddled into his warm body longer.

I grabbed josh's flannel shirt since it was closer to me and pulled on my sweats that I had one last night on the couch with Josh. You look so cute in my flannel Ty." My face heated up a little and smiled slightly without replying. I was about to open the door before I did I heard another aggressive knock my eyes widened in shock before turning to look at Josh who had the same facial expression I had. I watched him get off the couch quickly get pants on. "I'll get the door okay." I didn't get a chance to refuse he gently pushed me to the side and answered it himself.

"That is the last goddamn time!"

I flinched what is wrong with this guy? I questioned myself, then I saw him and realized exactly what was wrong. My face turned pure red with embarrassment while Josh was trying not to laugh, I could see it on his face.

"How the fuck are two guys so loud that almost everyone in the apartment filed complaints this morning!?" Our landlord yelled at Josh. "Ask the guy who **screams ** that loud." he looked at me wiggling his eyebrows I covered my face with my hands, god Josh always finds a way to embarrass me even more than I already am.

"I want you both out by the end of the week." with that we watched him shut the door himself and leave in anger.

I heard fits of laughter coming out of Josh. "You must really enjoy getting it rough, huh must be a real freak inside." My head flew up to look at Josh. His sweet, but slightly sexy smile caught my attention, "I'm not a freak inside Josh-" I began to trail off, "but sometimes you make me turn into one..." Josh's eyebrow's raised and his smile grew wider.

I spoke up quickly after saying that to cover what I had previously said "Anyway! Were homeless!" I said and saw Josh shrug it off and plot back on the couch. "Josh this is serious we have a week." I was a bit frantic about it, but it always seems to fade when Josh calms me down.

"Come here, sweetheart."

"No, now isn't the time for this shit Joshua." I responded coldly, all I can think about is the future we don't have much money and now we're pretty much a couple of hobo's the inside of my mind screamed how could Josh be calm at times like this god he's so inconsiderate.

"Ty, come here."

I heard Josh say again, slightly louder and a bit more annoyed with me. I wanted to jump on him and just cuddle and get called 'sweetheart' more from him, but fuck that I thought about earlier and goddammit, this guy really does make me a freak. I smiled and walked into our small kitchen, Josh isn't really inconsiderate... I suppose everyone has flaws, including myself, what do I look like in his perspective?

My thoughts darted back and forth to where I was pretty much spaced out and didn't know Josh was right behind me until I felt arms pick me up by my waist and force me to the couch. "H-Hey! You can't just do that when I'm mad at you!" I said coldly again. "You're not mad at me, Ty." I felt his face nuzzled into my neck with a smile on his face and my heart sunk, I giggled and smiled too, "Joshie!" I squealed out feeling his stubble tickling my neck. "Stop it tickles!" I squirmed and squealed more trying my best to stay quiet.

Even if everything comes crashing down as long as Josh is by my side there's always a light. Even if I'm not super happy and cheerful like him I still can enjoy the small moments with him that bring me my happiness.

I felt him stop nuzzling my neck and now the only thing left was me trapped between his arms. "Let me go Josh, please?" I asked and saw him shake his head no, "If I let you go right now then this moment would end." I'm confused, "what moment?" I questioned.

"This one." I then felt his lips touch mine, that small spark in my stomach lit up when Josh turned our kiss into another make out session, my wrists were firmly trapped in Josh's much bigger hands so I wouldn't put up a fight not like I would. I started feeling hot like I suddenly got a fever, but it felt like the entire opposite of a fever, I felt like I'm special. Josh never looks at anybody else like he does to me, he's more sweet and cuddly just for me and tries to make me as happy as possible.

Josh broke our passionate kiss and leaned close to my ear and seductively whispered, "You know, if you weren't here right now I would be watching porn like it was a movie with a bag of chips." a smile broke loose on my face as I quickly got up and he too stood up with me. "Get out of my face!" I choked on laughter while playfullying pushing him back on the couch as I turned away I could hear Josh snickering.

Suddenly he pulled me back down on top of him. "Aren't I a romantic?" Josh wiggled his eyebrows at me once again and I had uncontrollable laughter. "I thought you were going to say something sexy you jerk," I laughed more.

After discussing our living arrangements, we are forced to live with his family for a while, we wanted to stay with mine but my parents are on vacation. Josh's parent's are sweet and kind with no problems with us living with them for awhile, so I guess we have somewhere to stay which is good

As we were finishing packing our stuff out of our old apartment I heard a box drop, "Josh, are you quitting now?" I frowned and carefully put the box I was carrying full of kitchen appliances down, then met Josh's devious smile. "Hey, what's with that look babe?" I asked, that was an entirely innocent question I asked, but of course Josh turned it into something different.

"Want to piss off the  landlord before we officially  leave?" Josh asked me in a low-pitched voice. "How do you plan to do that?" I questioned further, those dreamy eyes stared at me while Josh picked me up by the waist I began to blush, feeling his place me on the unmoved couch in the empty living room. He began kissing and sucking on my neck while his hand freely touch my sides.

"Scream, shout, moan as loud as you want sweetie this is gonna get rough."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M BACK BITCHES


	12. Broken pieces

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hold on, Josh wants to take a break?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's pretty long, just saying. But I enjoyed writing this chapter.

A few days while temporarily living in Josh's parent's, problems started to surface again. I felt a ton of bricks crush me after some of the words Josh had said to me yesterday evening, everything was great, in fact, perfect. I was laying in bed with Josh fast asleep with hand intertwined with mine, "Tyler..." I heard a sleepy groggy voice mumble. I glanced at Josh's still asleep face, is he sleep talking? How cute, I smiled to myself and shut my eyes ready to fall back to sleep, "Tyler... Annoying... Bad." I opened my eyes and looked at him again, that was a bit off, but I'm sure it was nothing.

I remember saying I couldn't live without Josh, and that was true because the next morning after I questioned him about what he meant by annoying and bad he merely said, "I don't remember anything, nor my dream last night." It was pretty obvious he remember I looked him dead in the eyes and saw through it. Now I wish I never mentioned anything, I started it, it was my fault Josh wasn't with me right now, it was my fault he got upset and said what I feared most, it was MY fault he left. Josh wasn't here, I was staying in a hotel because Josh... Josh told me,

_"I think we should take a **break** in our relationship."_

Everything changed from then on, I left most of my belongings at his parent's, it's not like I have the guts to go back without breaking down. I stayed in my hotel room for nearly a three weeks before losing my interest in Josh, by now I didn't feel much towards him and hated him for making me cry during the first week of not being with him. I brought myself to drive to his parent's house to get my stuff. Abigail welcomed me in and I told I her I would be quick, it's not like I have much interest in staying here anymore, I went into Josh's room and  seeing him sitting on his bed started to make me feel what I thought I left behind when he said let's take a break.

Fuck, I didn't even look at him, but he watched me grab anything that was mine. "Hey, Tyler...?" I heard a raspy voice call behind me, I ignored it without second thought, "Tyler, do you think... We could go out again?"

"No."

I calmly stated, I turned around and looked up at Josh, who was obviously in the state of confusion. "But you still love me, right?" He asked me in a small voice. "

"No."

My insides screamed at me to say yes and hug him to death, I denied it, I refused to fall for him again even if I still love him, I watched Josh's eyes dilate like something from a horror movie, "Y-You don't love me anymore?" He choked out to me. I felt my stomach drop I was so scared to lose him, "You asked for a break, here's your break. Go out and fuck a guy or something." I said while getting more of my belongings. "Because none of them would add up to what I felt and had with you," Josh told me and I started feeling that spark I had with him in the beginning, "I'm still in love with you, I asked for a break so I could figure everything out, I thought leaving would be easy for a while but then you showed up again. All I think about anymore is how everything used to be, the way we liked it, the way you were here with me."

"I just can't do this again, Josh." I turned to the door and after walking through the door, I heard him talk to me again, "Just tell me what you want me to do and I'll do it Tyler, I won't love someone else like I love you." _Dammit Josh just let me go already, I know you can do better,_ I turned my head to the side and didn't speak back I started taking a few steps away, I couldn't even look at him, I know if I do I'll break. "Wait, Tyler!" Josh's raspy voice said again, "I love you-" I heard him start to cry, choking on his own words.

"And I'll wait for you to say it back. I know I've been a little off lately, but it's not your fault, it's never your fault, It's mine just please stay with me, will start over again, I'll do everything you ask I'll treat you better I promise!" My heart stopped with every word he said, so truthful, so kind, I felt my cheeks began to soak with tears, "I-I-" I couldn't speak, I turned around to face the man I know I'm still hopelessly in love with. "Josh, get in my car." I saw the small hope in his eyes gleaming at me as I put down my belongings in his room. He did get in my car without a second and I drove us to a few stores.

It was like we were together again, we were having fun running to stores getting what we wanted, by the end of the day it was past midnight and we finally went back to my hotel for the last night I already had bought. We were laughing and giggling on the bed watching movies like in the beginning of our friendship, "Hey Tyler, you want a drink." I contemplated it, _I don't usually drink... But_ "Sure." We started drinking alcohol but not enough to be drunk, Josh would feed me some ice cream he was eating and I didn't mind, "Josh..." I mumbled. "What's up?" He happily asked me. I smiled and felt a small heat rise from my stomach while looking at Josh, "I love you," the words neither of us really say to each other often came out and everything started getting intense staring at each other like it was the first time again.

Josh's eyes were beautiful, it was like they were dancing with love and compassion towards me, I didn't stop myself from doing what I felt was right, I grabbed his shirt and pulled him on top of me, "We're not just friend's and we never have been," I whispered, "were lovers right?" I smiled getting that bubbly feeling that only Josh could give me. Josh's lips crashed into mine, his left hand was on my cheek Deeping our kiss, his other hand was on placed gently on my hip. It felt so good being with him, I missed it so much, his tongue danced around mine perfectly, pure passion this definitely wasn't lust. Why does this feel so much better from usual? It was like a kiss from god himself, it felt that right, he sucked on my bottom lip and fought passionately with his tongue.

Josh pulled his head back and looked me straight in the eyes for a moment, his smile was absolutely breathtaking, after he blinked his lips pressed against my neck and I couldn't help myself from running my hand through his curly red hair. He sucked on my sweet spot, lick and nibble on my ear, he knew me all too well, I grasped the back of his shirt, moaning every time he abused my sweet spot, he didn't stop until he was satisfied. He sat up for a moment to take off his shirt and while he did, I noticed the tent in his pants, my face was flushed red from excitement. He gestured for me to take my shirt off too, and I obeyed only to be gently pushed back down on the bed and find Josh licking my chest occasionally leaving love bites. He got my pants off along with his and used his teeth to take my boxers off, which I found kind of sexy, neither of us decided to do all the nasty things we would casually do because this was different.

I watched Josh in a daze, reaching for a condom, but before he could grab it, I grabbed his wrist and bit my lip, he looked back at me in confusion, "Use the lube instead," I said with a shaky breath. Josh's face lightened up and began to grin while grabbing what I had asked for, I watched him rub it on his cock and place it near my entrance, "Are you sure about this, Ty?" He asked me. This really was just like our first time, I giggled to myself and nodded, "I want this to happen." Josh gave me a nervous smile before entering slowly giving me time to adjust.

Josh thrust slow at first and gradually sped up, moans escaped my lips, he was being so gentle but when he found my prostate he rough and damn did it feel good, he would thrust and suck on my neck at the same time, which felt like heaven, "Josh, fuck, if you keep doing that." I felt his smirk pressed against my neck as he only thrust harder. I felt him cum first and that was enough for me to do so as well, Josh collapsed next to me and I was still in a daze, I snapped out of it and flipped onto my side facing away from Josh.

"Are you still upset with me...?"

"No."

"I'm still sorry for-"

"Josh, don't apologize, you wanted to take a break still right?" I muttered sadly, I can understand if he felt like I'm tying him down and wanted to find a different guy seriously, what do I have that he would want? At that moment I was shocked to feel an arm pull me closer and make me flip over, "J-Josh? What are you-" his lips touched mine, I melted into another kiss he had given me. "Ty, I've missed you since then I waited for you to come back, but you never did, then when I saw you come in my room, I thought you came back to me, then you rejected me...I guess I was wrong huh..." his eyes looked down while talking with a small frown on his lips. "No! No you're not wrong, I still love you I just didn't want to hurt you again, I'm the one who should be sorry."

Josh averted his eyes back to mine and just stared at me for another long moment, his hand touched my cheek again and I smiled, "I'm your boyfriend remember?" I said happily, watching Josh's eyes light up. "Yeah, Yeah you are." he pulled me to his chest and we fell asleep together.

The next morning I had awoken before Josh did, it was hard to get out of bed whenever he has his arm locked around me like he's trying to protect me in his sleep, but I managed to get up without disturbing him. I went to the bathroom first, to do my morning routine, and stopped in the mirror, "Holy Christ!" I yelled slightly, looking at four dark purplish hickeys on my neck, I rubbed them in shock, _Josh never ever leaves marks like that_ I then proceeded to the shower and saw my chest had small bite marks left on it, _damn Josh, and you call me a freak..._

Josh had woken up like freaking two hours later than me and we were back at his parent's house, I got some strange looks wearing a scarf in the middle of July by his family. "Josh, we were worried sick about you, you left out of nowhere yesterday without a note and didn't answer any calls," Laura said to him, then she looked at me and smiled warmly, "and I'm glad to see you back with Josh again."

"I am too."


	13. A/N

Another chapter will be uploaded possibly later maybe? But anyway, I went back and fixed most of my shitty old grammar and improved it for everyone :3  
Mostly wanted to say that cause people who bookmarked this ff probably got a updates on it, sorry about that.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Abigail appears again! :3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I'm gonna be honest, I have no idea what I was thinking when writing this chapter don't judge me okay, I just threw something together, I mean, Its kind of hard to write a story about gay ff when you're writing it in a library with people everywhere lmao.

Josh left earlier, leaving me to occupy myself, Ugh, there's nothing to do around here, I was currently lying down on Josh's bed, staring at the ceiling until I heard someone twist the door knob and walk in like it was their own room, "Hey tyler, have you seen Josh?" Abigail asked me. "Nope, he left about thirteen minutes ago I think," I said with a sigh at the end, I turned my head and saw Abigail looking down at me with a smile plastered on her face, "What's up?" I questioned, she seemed happy? No, mad? No, _why would I even think she's mad when she's smiling, seriously,_ I mentally face palmed myself, okay she looks excited.

Abigail was looking at me confused now, like she was waiting on something, "What?" I questioned further. "I just asked you a question and all you did was lay there staring into space," _great job paying attention Tyler, why am I responding to myself in third person? it's really weird, haha! help me Jesus..._ I flinched when she snapped her fingers in front of my face, "Tyler, hello? Answer please." I looked at her and said the first thing that came to mind, "What?" I watched her face began to look annoyed, "Tyler, if you say 'what' one more time I will flip, I asked if you wanted to hang out with me while Josh is gone... are you okay? is something bothering you?"

I became quiet for a moment, then spoke, "I'm confused about me and Josh's relationship."

I have no idea how but ten minutes later I was laying on her bed talking about my problems, "So like, Josh broke up with me for almost a month and when I came back he wanted to date again--" I paused for a moment. Abigail was sitting beside me on her pillow with her legs crossed, "Keep going honey, I'm listening." god she brings out the girlie side of me, "--I said no and after spending the night in a hotel with him just as friend's I ended up having sex with him, then I started liking him again after that and told him I was still his boyfriend," I looked up and her concentrated face, "why does it have to be so complicated."

Abigail nodded her head, "What I'm seeing here is Josh undenialably loves you he's probably just trying to figure out your feelings right now and thought separating for a bit would be best, but i have no doubt he loves you, I mean seriously, he cried like a baby right after you left." I raised my eyebrows at this, "Really? He missed me that much? Why does he have to be so sweet," Abigail giggled and we both heard a car door shut, "I think Josh is home," I looked at the door, then back at her, we both agreed to go back to Josh's room so Josh wouldn't raise questions on why I'm in his sister's room.

 "I'll go and just and leave you and Josh alone," she winked at me, I began to blush over it, "I'm not gonna have sex with Josh--" I didn't finish my sentence before Josh walked into the bedroom, "--right...now...." I mumbled the last parts. "What about sex with me?" he asked me in confusion, looking at Abigail before me, "Uh... w-we we're...um talking about weather?" I mentally face palmed myself again, Josh obviously didn't buy it, really, who would after hearing sex and then weather.

Abigail left the room holding back her laughter, as I watched Josh close the door and sit next to me, I stood back up again, "I need to go--"  Josh quickly stopped me, "Whats the rush?" He asked, grabbing my hand with toothy smile. "Um, I-I, shower, " I stuttered out, given the poor word choice, Josh just shrugged and let go of my hand. I went to the bathroom feeling stupid, I still get weird around Josh apparently, I took of my clothes off and I  hopped in the shower.

I felt relaxed after a hot shower, maybe I'll turn in earlier and wake up late, I only put on boxers since I was just going to stay in Josh's room might at well be comfy, I walked out catching Josh's attention, "What?" I asked unsure if the look he gave me was good or bad. "Nothing, I was just looking," Josh said in a unconvincing tone. I frowned and sat down on his lap putting my arms around his neck, "Is something wrong, Joshie?" Josh jerked his head back probably not expecting me to sit on his lap, "No, I was just talking to Abigail, did you have fun with her today?" He flashed his smile at me and I got speechless.

"Ty, your in your boxers sitting on my lap." Josh wrapped his arms around my waist while I cuddled into him, "Yeah I had fun with Abby and I know I'm in my boxers, I was planning to go to bed right now." Josh's grip tightened on me, "Can I sleep with you?" He asked me, I looked up at him and started laughing, "Josh, this is your room you don't need permission," with that, I got myself out of Josh's grip and cuddled into Josh's surprisingly soft covers, the moment Josh was settled into his boxers and lying in bed was the minute I cuddled up to Josh for warmth. "Sometimes you resemble a cat," Josh stated to me, causing my eyebrow to raise. "Huh?" I heard him chuckle at my response and he moved his arm under me so he could hold me closer I'm guessing, "Every time we sleep together your always either holding onto my arm, head on my chest or on top of me."

I didn't think he noticed that much, "Is that a problem?" I shot Josh a glare and saw him shake his head, "Nope,  I like it, I think it's cute." I blushed, "I am not cute, I am a man and-" "Tyler, shut up," he kissed me softly and messed with my hair, "god you over think, can't you just accept the fact your adorable," then he kissed the top of my head. "You know sometimes I wonder what our future will be like married," I casually stated without thinking, "Oh so you do want to get married after all? You brought this up in the car before about marrying me, but I guess you were serious, I'll keep that in mind."

My eyes popped open, "Hold on... T-Thats not what I mean't! I mean, it is, b-but it isn't-"

"Tyler, calm down, i don't mind hearing you want to marry me, its sweet and I would be lying if I said i didn't want to marry you." I think I just had another moment with Josh... "But you are lying," I grinned like an idiot seeing Josh's eyebrows knit together, "Your lying down, haha dry humor, kill me." I whispered the last part enough to where Josh could only hear me, "Your so dumb with jokes," he told me and laughed at my really bad pun. "Says the one who's laughing," I giggled and closed my eyes again.

"I don't get it," I mumbled, trying to keep myself awake just to talk to Josh, "What do you mean, Ty?" Josh asked me in his half awake, half asleep voice, I yawned, "I don't get why you love me so much," I said, causing Josh to smile, "Cause I belong with you, you belong with me and someday will get married and will adopt a baby girl," Josh told me, I felt my cheeks heat up again, "Y-You remembered," I was surprised Josh had remembered our conversation about how I wanted kids, "How could I forget, you were so embarrassed that day," I was flustered enough by just bringing up marrying Josh possibly, but now I feel like hiding away and calming my heart rate down.

Josh fell silent and from what I assume, he fell asleep, so I snuck a kiss on his cheek and stayed cuddled into him all night in his bed.

 


	15. SPECIAL A/N

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Read to the end, thanks!

Okay, let me start with this, sorry I'm doing another A/N because, HOLY SHIT, This story actually made 100 kudos! I'm so fucking happy right now! And I've been getting personal messages from people on this story! Thank you guys so much, personally I never thought this would get even 20 kudos and now it's at 100, so I'm doing something special,

 

**SPECIAL UPDATE: I was thinking about writing a side project special chapter where Tyler and Josh are married with their child because, one: its been mentioned that they want to get married one day, two: it sounds like a freaking adorable special chapter, and three: I feel like writing that for some reason. (please keep in mind the special chapter will take longer than a regular one and will not be counted as a present day of the chapter before this A/N)**

So that is all for this announcement, if you have any questions or something you want to say you can email me, yukiisama3@gmail.com

Bye for now :3


	16. SPECIAL CHAPTER

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you didn't read the last update, I'm telling you this now.
> 
> THIS IS NOT DURING THE PRESENT, THIS IS THE FUTURE, just so you don't get confused.
> 
> This is the after life where Tyler and josh are married with a daughter.
> 
> This is the 100+ Kudos special chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Roughly over 8000 words

"Dad!" I heard a small voice say. I rolled over and saw my daughter jump on the bed and on top of Josh, I laughed seeing Josh sprung up from his lying down position, "What are you doing up, sweetie?" Josh asked our daughter, who was currently on Josh hugging him. "It's my birthday!" Josh smiled, he tickled her sides and she squealed, he's an amazing father he always makes her smile and laugh, she calls him Dad and me Daddy its just cute.

Our daughter's name is Celia Joseph Dun, yep she has my original last name as her middle name, she's now nine years old and the sweetest little girl ever, we have our own house, we still visit his family, Celia loves her baby-sitter who is her Aunt, Abigail. Josh proposed to me on our third year together on Fourth of July, he bought fireworks that spelled 'Tyler, will you marry me?' right when I looked at him he already had the ring out with a big goofy smile, after getting married a couple years later we adopted a four year old girl just like he said would happen.

Josh froze and looked at me, "I think Daddy's up, get him!" before I knew it, him and Celia were tickling me, "N-No fair!" I squirmed under celia's small body while Josh held me down, she stopped and hugged me, "Daddy, what are we doing today?" Her big brown eyes looked into mine with a big grin, "Its a surprise," Josh said from the other side of me. Josh was in the bathroom as I made breakfast, Celia does the same thing she does every morning before breakfast, drawing, "Daddy, why do other kids have a girl and their daddy?" I contained laughter from how she referred to a mother as another dad, "Well, because some kids have two dads and others have a mommy, but two dads can love a child the same as any other mommy and daddy."

Its not like I can just tell her she was adopted because her other parent's either didn't want her or gave her up for a reason, "Does that mean I'm a weirdo?" I sat a plate of french toast in front of Celia and laughed, "No, you're special," I told her and then Josh came out, "Your Daddy is a weirdo," he said with a chuckle, Celia looked up at me, "I wanna marry someone like Dad when I grow up!" I looked at Josh in shock and he merely smiled.

We ate breakfast and Josh helped Celia chose her outfit and put her light brown hair in twin tails, Josh walked out of her room and high fived me, "Congratulations on getting her to hold still."

It took a few hours and quite a bit of Celia complaining before finally we were ready to leave, the minute I buckled my seat belt I turned to look at Celia, "Josh, I think we forgot someone... " Celia was in the backseat still drawing random little doodles, "What are you talking about? Celia's right back-- Ohh," he got out of our car and opened the fence and our dog jump in the backseat.

Josh locked the fence and got back in the car, "Why did we decide to get a dog for? Cats are the best," Josh Complained. I looked in the backseat and saw his husky staring at Celia's hand moving, "Dad don't like doggie?" Celia's small voice said, "No, no, no, he loves 'doggie' right, josh?" I shot him a glare, "Of course, I love Riley."

Josh drove to his parents and Celia clapped her hand, "Aunt Abby!" I turned my head and seen Abigail through the kitchen window with my mother, "Is that my mom?" I slightly raised my eyebrow, "Grandma!" Celia fidgetted with her seat belt until she got it to unbuckle, "Hold on, Celia!" I called out watching her run to the front door, I looked at Josh and he chuckled, "Reminds me of you, sweetheart." I paused for a moment, "Y-You haven't called me that in forever... " I then saw Jordan open the door and let Celia in.

"What are you waiting for? Kiss already."

I nearly jumped out of my skin when I looked to my right side Abigail's face was smooshed on the window, "Abby!" I blushed embarrassed, I glared at her, but then I felt a hand turn my head facing Josh, he cupped my cheeks in his hand and kissed me deeply, Abigail fell silent as he pulled away from me, I looked at Abigail's red face. Josh got out after me and grabbed my hand leading me inside, only to see Celia lifted in the air by Jordan, "Man, you need to stop growing," Jordan said with a big smile, Celia giggled at him.

We spent time with family and celebrated Celia's birthday, the problem was today Josh is leaving for a while, he's going to London with Ashley and Abigail. We did go to see him off with the girls, I didn't cry, I did my best to make it seem like I was happy but Josh knows me too well to buy that anymore. My eye's threatened tears and Josh noticed, Celia was telling Abigail and Ashley bye, so he immediantly hugged me, "Hey, don't cry babe, I'll be back, I promise."

It's been maybe a month since Josh went to London, Celia's been asking me 'When's Dad coming home?' everyday, I would tell her he'll be back soon and she would just frown and play with Riley. Right now, I'm laying in bed half way asleep when my phone went off, I rolled my eye's and answered it.

"Hello?" I groaned tiredly,

"Hey, sweetheart I'll be home in a few days."

"Josh?"

Suddenly, he hung up and I began to pout, ' _I have to wait few more days... just lovely'_. I put my phone down, ' _I wish we were together right now...'_ I tried again to go to sleep, before I could the door slowly opened, I squinted my eyes and looked at the time, "Honey, its four in the morning, go back to bed Josh will be home in-"

"What are you talking about? She's spending the night at my mom's, sweetheart."

My eye's opened, Celia is with Laura... so then...

I sat up and turned on the light, greeted by my husband's radiant smile, "Josh!" Tears fled my eye's I was so happy to see him again, Josh dropped his lugage down and walked to my side of the bed, his thumbs wiped off my tears and he kissed my forehead, "Surprise." I hugged Josh with perhaps excessive force, "Ty, you're squeezing me a bit too hard." "O-oh I'm sorry... " I let him go and was on my knees on the bed just to be close to Josh's height.

I still have the same feelings for Josh that I've had for years now, it almost feels like he controls the way I feel around him.

"I thought about you a lot while in London," I gazed up at Josh and my lips slightly parted, "I really missed you and Celia." Josh grabbed my wrist and pulled me up, "Josh? What are you doing?" I asked, confused by his actions then he lifted me up like a bride, "w-wait... " I stuttered, covering my embarrassed red face with my hands. "You're still embarrassed after years of being together," Josh Laughed ' _Josh's laugh is so freaking sexy'_ , he carried me into the living room and laid down with me on top, "can we go to sleep like this tonight?" I raised my eyebrow, "Why? We have a bed, Josh."

My head rested on his chest, he sighed faintly, _His heart is beating so fast, I can hear it,_ "I want to sleep here because I liked the days when we fell asleep on the couch together, in our old apartment, when I was just your friend." I remembered those days too, when we couldn't afford a bed so we slept on the couch together, it wasn't weird to us, I coughed awkwardly and muttered something under my breath.

"What was that, sweetheart?" Josh asked. I began to blush, "I um, said that I liked it every time you accidentally touched my hand while walking together." Josh chuckled and surprised me, "Oh sweetie, those were never accidents." I blushed deeper, "You meant to grab my hand that one day?!" I was shocked, _'now that I think about it he wasn't really subtle about liking me'_. "Yes, I held your hand on purpose, you looked at me so innocently when I did that, besides you held my hand back." He was right... I did hold his hand the entire walk, "I only held your hand cause-"

"You had a crush on me."

"Shut up, shut up right now, Josh."

Josh laughed again and we soon fell asleep together.

I was all nice and cozy laying on Josh with his arm around me, holding me all night, suddenly, knocking at the door ruined my sleep. I opened my eye's as the light hit my face from the window, I looked at Josh's face, he was sound asleep so peacefully...  but he needs to wake up now, I leaned up and pressed my lips against his. Josh's eye's quickly opened, I got off him with a smile, "That was a nice way of waking me up, Ty."

I opened the door and Celia hugged my waist, "Daddy, Grandma is mean." I looked at Laura confused yet again, "She wanted an extra cupcake." I smiled at Laura and she went back to her car, Celia's face filled with excitement as she seen Josh stretching on the couch, "Dad's home!" She ran and jumped on Josh, just like every morning.

Celia, Josh and I all spent the day on the couch together.

Finally, I'm finally entirely happy with Josh.


	17. A/N

This story isn't over :P


	18. Friends with previous benefits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler tells Abigail the story of how they ended up is an odd "Friend" relationship before actually dating Josh, a few kisses and an old couch are enough for them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm working on a smut chapter right now, I did this 2 hour page so you guys have something to enjoy while I'm stilling writing the other chapter, might as well dig into how they even started liking each other right?
> 
> P.S: Thanks for all the support guys! I wake up every morning and see comments and private emails (yukiisama3@gmail.com) about this story, it makes me happy to know you all enjoy this as much as I like writing it :3 *hugs reader*

Abigail asked me this morning how I ended up like Josh more than friends, so here's the story.

**_ ~Flashback woop woop woop~ _ **

"Tyler, I told you a millions times, I'm only going to my parent's for like an hour."

"Then take me with you! I don't want to stay in this place alone."

"Fine."

Josh took my hand and pulled me out the door then let it go, "You didn't have to pull me out, jerk." During this time we we're trying to get used to each other living together, its been so awkward, "Relax, I pulled you out by your hand, big deal." I glared at him while he was locking the door, basically I always found Josh somewhat attractive from the beginning so this was a huge deal for me, I held my hand up, probably blushing, I don't remember, "Josh, no." Josh laughed at me and walk past me, "It's not like I kissed you, I grabbed you're hand for like, three seconds, now let's go."

I was pretty stubborn around him, already annoyed by living with him, seems a bit unreal right?

I quietly followed Josh, we walked maybe a block and a half before Josh's hand touched mine for a lot longer than an accidental touch, "Dude!" I snatched my hand away from his touch, "quit!" He laughed again, "You were being quiet, I thought it would be a funny way to get your attention." My face heated up quickly, "You want my attention?" Josh frozen in his tracks for a moment, "Uh, I was joking... sort of... " _'Sort of? Sort of?! What does that even mean?!'_ I shrugged it off, but really I was trying to figure everything out.

I decided to break the silence.

"I wouldn't kiss you... just saying."

"Oh... "

Why does my heart keep beating faster?  Josh is a guy, I'm a guy, Josh isn't gay and I might be. I glanced over at Josh's face and then looked to the side.

"W-well, if you wanted to... it would mean nothing though."

Josh quickly snapped his head towards me, "You're hands are trembling... " Maybe because I'm ready to faint now, "Oh, don't worry about- JOSH!" 'Oh my god he's holding my hand!' I jumped out of my skin, there was a rush going through me right now, why? why does this happen every time he does things like this, "What? It's not weird," I looked at him, my lips slightly parted ready to say something but yet nothing, my eyes were locked with his, "As mad as you claimed to be you still haven't let go of my hand, Tyler." 

I looked down and saw my hand almost on cue locked it self with Josh's hand, "S-so?!" I turned my head the opposite direction of Josh's eyes, blushing like a total wreck, "It was an accident." I still didn't let go, it felt nice holding his hand, "Then why are you still holding my hand." I calmed down, there is no way in hell I'm going to date Josh, I never even dated a guy before, let alone my roommate, "Um, well, I think its adorable how worked up you get over small things, besides you haven't let go either!" Josh pointed out to me, I swallowed, this is starting to become another awkward scenario with Josh, thank god we made it to his parent's house.

Josh's family, not what I expected, Abigail's a lot more nice then Josh's description of her, Ashley keeps flirting with me, making me quite uncomfortable, Jordan isn't even here and his parent's I didn't even talk to much, this is the first time I even met his family. Even the walk home was uncomfortable, it was quiet.

I didn't know how Josh pulled off walking in silence, so when we got home it was pretty late, unlike how Josh said, "only an hour or so" I flopped on the make shift messy pallet on the floor next to the couch where I slept every night, I took off my clothing except my boxers with as little movement as possible, Josh did the same and laid on the couch, this was normal, we did this every night around 8 we would lay down and watch a movie until one of us fell asleep. I was watching, my back hurt a little from sleeping nearly a week on the floor, Josh must have noticed how uncomfortable I was.

 "Hey, why don't we switch places for tonight?"

"'Cause, I chose the floor so you could be comfy."

"Okay, how about we both sleep on the couch?"

I sat up and had a 'Areyoufuckingserious?' face plastered on me, "Josh, the couch is for one person only, idiot." He looked down, trying to figure something out, "Okay, then sleep on top of me, you're small enough." I rolled my eyes and face some reason I did get on top of him, but this was just to sleep, only to sleep. Maybe about a good half way through the movie, Josh started talking again, "You said you would kiss me if I wanted to right?" I paused the movie, "Um, yeah, earlier I did as a joke, why?" Josh's hand was already on my lower back, "What if I asked you now? Just for a kiss, an experiment you could say."

I did want to see if I really was gay for Josh and Josh was trying to figure out if he was gay himself... "One kiss, means nothing right?" I asked reluctantly, "Yep."

And so it happened.

Josh's lips touched mine, god they were so soft, he pulled away first, for some reason we ending up in another kiss, to the point where I was the one under him, the second time we pulled away Josh's eyes locked with mine again, "What are we doing...?" I asked, I wanted more, he's like red poison that I ended up kissing, "I don't know but I like it." Josh's lips pressed against mine again, things started getting heated, Josh's tongue was in my mouth, he even kissed my neck a few times, we parted once again and I think I saw Josh blushing, "W-wow, you're a really good kisser," I was stunned, Josh turned me on with a kiss, "I think I should sleep on the floor tonight and uh we can sleep on the couch tomorrow... " Josh agreed, I laid back down on my home-made pallet.

I couldn't stop thinking about that kiss it was so hot, it left a tingle sensation on my lips, it was just a meaningless kiss for Josh probably... I noticed he flipped over to the other side not facing me as usually, I did the same. Waking up the next morning was average, Josh and I played it off as usually, but I could feel the tension, "About last night... " Josh bit his lip nervously looking at me, "Don't worry about it, it was just an experiment like you said." I smile reassuringly, Josh inhaled deeply, "Actually, I was... hoping we could do it again... "

I blushed furiously, "U-um, s-sure I guess." I felt embarrassed, how could I fall in such a trap, I didn't think he would want to do it again, or that I would accept it, this is pointless. "Well, come over here." I fidgeted with my fingers, this was absolutely nerve-racking, Josh is my first gay kiss and I already want to be with him. I slowly walked up to Josh who was leaning on the counter, Josh's hand was gently placed on my cheek as he touched my lips with his again, my arms were around his neck, he was way too good at this, his teeth lightly bit my bottom lip, sucking on it gently, he was really getting into this, he licked and sucked on my ear lobe, kissed my neck and teased me by only going a bit up my shirt with his hand.

I was in heaven, a few moans would come out of me, surprising Josh every time, but he was just a friend, a friend I wouldn't mind having a one night stand with, but I'm not that type of person. Josh stopped after a while, I backed away from him in pure bliss, "Oh my god, Tyler, I'm so sorry I-" I quickly cut him off, "Don't be, I had a choice."

"Then why did you..."

"Kiss you? For fun I guess."

"C-cool, friends still?"

"Friends."

**_ ~Back to present morning with Abigail woop woop woop~ _ **

I watched Abigail's eyes widen, "So you're saying, you and Josh held hands, kissed, made out AND foreplay, back when you were friends?!" I chuckled, "Yeah, it was only for those few days, then after we came here and Josh confirmed he was gay that one time to his parents, we started doing small things and then bam, we're together." I saw Josh approach me and he pecked my lips, "I'll be back in a little while, unless you want to come grocery shopping with me." I smiled at Abigail and then reached my hand over to grab Josh's,

"I would go anywhere with you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Words) IT'S OVER 8000!


	19. bedtime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes sleep doesn't work out for Tyler.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heathen criminal Tyler just tied with Josh in my heart <3

I was up late at night, Josh was still in bed, in fact everyone was still in bed. I had awoken from another one of those dreams... I haven't had a sex dream about Josh since we started dating, I was sweating, my heart raced, even my thoughts were all over the place, _'Why did the dream occur again? Why did they start in the first place? What about my, uh, "problem", how the hell am I going to take care of this when Josh is holding me, in his boxers... Pressed up against me, I need to stop thinking that way or I'll never-'_ "Baby, are you awake?" I froze, Josh is awake, his thumb stroked my stomach lightly causing my face to turn red.

I stayed quiet, I couldn't bare the idea of Josh finding out I just wet dreamed of him again, it would be so... Awkward. Josh apparently assumed I was still asleep, his arm moved just slightly above what I really didn't want him to find out, _'Please god no'_ I bit my lip and began shivering, Josh is breathing close to my ear and his arm is alarmingly close to- I inhaled sharply, his hand brushed against my hard on while he was changing his position, "Babe?"

I curled myself up and spoke in a soft, small voice, "Yes?"

"Are you turned on?"

 _'Goddammit'_ I swallowed hard and thought about what I could say, but my mouth says whatever it wants, "Ha, nope, if I was turned on I would be thinking about you just like in my dream." I think I about shit myself, Josh sat up and forced me on my back, he peered down at me as I quickly brought my knees up to cover up my issue, "Are you getting those dreams again?" I averted my eyes to look at the wall, "It's nothing." I shyly pulled the covers up to my face to hide myself, he wasn't having none of that. I didn't really get a chance to avoid physical contact with Josh, he pulled the blankets down and pinned my hands above me, "Tell me what dream you just had and I'll let you go."

I reluctantly looked at him, unsure if I should tell him, but I did anyway, "I had another... Dirty dream of you, b-but! It's nothing really." Josh's face was smiling, "It doesn't seem like nothing," he pushed my legs apart, revealing my tented boxers, I shrieked when Josh got on top of he covered my mouth with his hand, "be quiet, you'll wake up my family." I knitted my eyebrows together, he knows damn well I'm not quiet, I glared up at him with regret and possibly a little be of hatred at the moment, Josh just chuckled at my face. I found myself tempted to let Josh do what he wants, but that's not happening tonight, I jerked forward in a failed attempt to push him off.

Josh is stronger and held me down harder, "You're really making this harder than usual, that's hot," anything I said was simply quiet mumbles blocked by Josh's hand still, 'I'm going to kill you, Joshua' "if you wanted to play rough you could have begged," _'BEGGED? Does he seriously think that I want this much? At least I have some decency.'_ Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love sexual encounters with Josh, but it would be embarrassing to get questioned by his family about the noises they might hear, he took his hand anyway and I finally spoke, "Please stop."

Josh looked at me in surprise, "That's not what I hear," I squirmed beneath Josh, refusing to do what he wanted, "Tyler." Josh purred into my ear, I grunted out of stubbornness and he gave me a small kiss, I refused the kiss and blocked it with my hand, "Josh, no." He chuckled, grabbing my hand to pull it away, forced kissed me and began trailing his other hand all over my chest, stomach and side, "J-Josh, quit!"

Josh didn't take no for an answer, he took his hand away from my side and used it to instead force my head to the side, I started squirming again, Josh easily kept me down with one hand, "It's kind of fun watching you get mad," I would be lying if I said this wasn't kind of fun having Josh try so hard, "come one Ty, I know you're hard already." I blushed, shaking my head furiously, why was this oddly so exciting to me? "Please, w-we really shouldn't do this now." He smiled warmly down at me, "I'm just going to help you a little, I won't play with you that much." He bit his lip and then nibbled on my ear.

I was refusing a little less by less, Josh didn't give up but neither did I give up trying to get him off, another small moan came out again, "Josh, if you don't stop-" Josh raised his head from my ear in surprise, "Damn, you have an attitude," I growled, only for Josh to give me a kiss again, "If you really don't want to, I'll stop." I looked at Josh's lips then back to his eyes, i gave Josh a kiss back, he seemed confused, but happy, "You'll get us in trouble... we can't do this," Josh's face was obviously disappointed, he looked away from me and then his face brightened up again, "what is it?" I asked wondering why he was suddenly happy.

I was a bit frightened seeing Josh rummage throughout his nightstand and pull out something black, "What is that for? If it's a plug I will kill you, I'm not doing that ever again." Josh laughed, "No, this is my neck tie." The hell would he need a neck tie for? I hesitantly followed Josh's hand gesture to turn around, I did what he wanted and turned myself around sitting up on my knees, "Josh, seriously you're freaking-" my voiced muffled, I reached up to feel the silky, smooth, cloth pressed tightly against my mouth. I couldn't say anything, it was just muffles and unaudible words, "There, now we don't get in trouble and I get to mess with you."

Josh sat behind me, his arms were around my waist, I stopped resisting at this point. The slow, sensual wet kisses Josh was leaving on my back gave me shivers, I moaned feeling his tongue glide across my shoulder blade, "It looks like you're enjoying yourself finally." I looked over my shoulder with half-lidded eyes, Josh smiled at me, placing another sensual wet kiss between the nape of my neck and shoulder. "You look great with a tie around your mouth, but I wish I could hear your moans."

Josh turned me around and smiled again, "How about I take off the tie? But you have to stay quiet, at least enough where nobody wakes up." I nodded my head and felt the tie fall onto my lap, right then Josh pushed me on my back, he got on top of me using his forearms to support his weight.

Josh didn't waste time, he gave me a small kiss and sat back up to take off my boxers, the relief of having them off. "Josh, hurry up." Josh raised his eyebrow at me, "Do you want me to prepare you or not?" I shook my head, "I want it now." Josh sighed and reached in the night stand drawer again, "You asked for it just saying."

Possibly a spilt second after Josh entered me, I regretted my choice. "Fucking hell." I muttered, it hurt a lot more than I expected, "It'll get better." Josh assured me, he was right, I felt my face heat up as a moan escaped my lips, Josh thrusted harder, using his hand to cover my mouth, "Only little moans." Pleasurable and torture, I made small squeaks and quiet moans. I kept as quiet as possible, it's one thing to tell me to keep quiet but Josh's sweaty body, a few strains of hair stuck to his forehead was hot as hell.

Josh thrusted faster until I felt my legs tremble and my back arched, "Oh my-" I felt a warmth hit my stomach, I was still calming down to realize Josh came right after me. Josh pulled out and reached into the drawer again, pulling out a tissue, wiping off my stomach and putting my boxers on for me, "Josh, did you plan this?" Josh then laid next to me, "No, why?" I cuddled up next to him, " 'Cause you seem to keep everything for sex in the drawer next to your bed."

He laughed, kissing my temple and spooning me, "I keep it there just in case someday we ended up like this, I could never leave my baby turned on like that, I'm supposed to keep you happy babe."

I swear if I didn't have Josh I wouldn't be even this happy.


	20. These were before I met you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler goes to his mom for help and Josh makes a special promise?

Waking up this morning was a pain, literally. I groaned getting up, _'God damn, my ass hurts.'_ Trying to walk normal was a hassle, I threw on the pants I had wore yesterday and did a weird looking walk into the kitchen gaining looks from everyone.

Laura was first to speak, "Tyler, honey, you look like you broke your leg."

Josh was holding laughter back.

I sat down and groaned again, "I must of slept on my leg wrong." I lied, Abigail blankly stared down at her cereal, poking at the floating cheerios, "Yeah he _**slept wrong**_." Ashely added on after Abigail, "He went _**right**_ to _**bed**_ with Josh last night." I looked at Laura, she was obviously confused.

Than there was Josh...

A absolute wreck, he was laughing so hard I don't even think he was aware of the situation.

I decided to go back to bed and eventually woke up three hours later. _'Shit I was supposed to visit my parents they came back today,'_ I sprung up only to find Josh watching me sleep again, "Seriously, stop watching me it's creepy." Josh's face was violently pale, "Ty, you're having those dreams again... I can tell." I blushed, 'is it that obvious?' I questioned myself, "Of course not, those dreams are long gone." I lied, it wasn't exactly like the regular ones, Josh wasn't Josh, he was me, I was looking in a mirror... it was a reflection of Josh as my own reflection?

It doesn't make sense... "It never does." Josh knitted his eyebrows together, almost like he was confused, _'cause he probably is... I don't expect him to know everything about me.'_  Josh placed his hand on my knee and I sighed, "Why does our relationship have to be complicated, I don't even know what I want anymore... I'm not even trying to be happy, Josh, I'm losing faith... " I stood up. Josh reached his hand towards me, I pushed it away, "Don't... not right now... I love you still." I ran out leaving Josh in shock.

I wasn't trying to upset Josh or make him worry. I walked the steps of my parent's porch and knocked on the door, my mom opened the door and gasped, "Tyler! You're home." She hugged me tightly, "Your father isn't home, but you can wait for him." I smiled and than suddenly frowned, "You said dad isn't home yeah?" She simply nodded. A good seven minutes later I'm sitting in my old room with my mom comforting me, "I-I don't know what to do... I can't leave him, I'm in love with Josh, I want to marry him one day, I want to give all of me to him, I want to be with him... but why aren't I happy with him? This isn't a toxic relationship... right?"

My mom smiled warmly, like how Josh smiled at me, "'Course not, Josh takes care if you right? You said he watches you sleep, ever think he might be watching to make sure you're okay? And happiness... you can't force yourself to be happy, happiness are the small moments in life."

My mom was right, I'm not gonna let life destroy what me and Josh have. I opened the door to leave my room, "Honey, where are you going?" I looked at her with a small smile and left.

_She smiled to herself, "I should of known..." She looked at the picture collecting dust on the dresser, two boys smiling next to each other, "that one day you would change Tyler's life for the better, watch him, show him he's loved by us all... **Josh**."_

I didn't realize how long I stayed, it was dark... I could see small sparks in the sky, I wonder if Josh is worried... I shouldn't of left him like that, I know he's trying his hardest to make me happy. I lost myself in thoughts, I wasn't paying attention anymore, I heard a loud honk and someone yelling at me. I snapped out of it and turned my attention to headlights getting closer.

It was a semi.

I fell to the ground roughly, a small yelp escaped my lips than I fell silent. "I-I'm alive?" I opened my eye's and saw a face peering down at me, "Are you hurt? You almost died." My vision cleared up and I saw Josh on top of me, "J-Josh? You... You saved me!" I cried out, rolling over so I was on top hugging Josh tightly. Josh hugged back and cooed into my ear, "Everything is okay Ty, I'm here now." His lips pressed against my cheek. Why was I crying? Tears kept pouring from my eyes, I clung to Josh's shirt like it was the last time I would ever see him again. Josh hushed me and kept me calm, he picked me up and carried me.

Josh sat me down at this little park, he crawled it a tunnel like tube maze big enough for three adults, I crawled in after him and winced in pain, Josh looked at me and reached for my sleeve, I pulled it away, "You're bleeding, please, let me help you." I still didn't let him help, afraid of what he might see.

Josh slowly reached for my sleeve again, "You know I won't hurt you sweetheart, just let me help." Josh grabbed my sleeve and began to roll it up. Tears started rolling down my cheeks again as I saw Josh's eyes widen. There was a large skim mark on my forearm and past memories below that. Josh traced the scars on my arm carefully, he was starting to cry, "Ty... tell me these aren't because I don't treat you good enough... I'm sorry." I looked at Josh's eye's, there was pain and sorrow in them.

"N-No! These were before I met you... When I was alone... Then the day I lost my apartment you were kind enough to take me in as a roommate." Josh's tears fell onto my wrist, "You were never my roommate, you were my best friend and my future husband." My face turned into surprised, "Y-you really want to marry me?" Josh smiled at me as the last tear rolled down his face, I cried harder, Josh wants me... He really wants me.

Josh kissed the scars on my wrist then gave me a kiss, he pulled me between his legs with his arms around my waist, I could feel him breathing slowly against my back, "We're gonna get through this together, don't lose faith or you'll never see life to the end with me." He cooed into my ear again.

I opened my eye's and saw a Josh holding two rings in front of me, "What are those for...?" I mumbled, Josh slipped one on my ring finger and one on his, "Promise rings." He smiled, nuzzling himself in the nape of my neck, one of his favorite things to do.

"I love you so much Josh, will you take all of me?"

"I do."

I giggled a little, "Josh, did you have to say it like we're getting married." I sniffled, Josh makes me feel better, I snuggled into him and closed my eyes again, _'He's really warm...'_ I brought my knees up to my chest, "Well, were both technically married already." I don't remember getting married... "We got married?"

Josh chuckled and played with my hair, "Sort of, I promised you marriage and a daughter a few months ago." Oh right... that one day I slipped up and said I wanted to get married, I forgot he told me we could pretend we are. I was tired from so much crying, my eye's grew heavier with every blink, "Josh tell me something good about life." Josh took a minute to think, "Living with you."

I yawned and cuddled my head into the side of Josh's arm, I must of dozed off.

I woke up still in the tube snuggled between Josh's legs, there was his back pack left opened next to me and a thin blankets over me, _'Josh must've threw it over me when I fell asleep._ ' I heard faint snoring behind me, I looked to my side and saw Josh's left hand holding mine. Shook Josh's arm and he woke up, "Oh... we fell asleep in the park together." Josh pressed his lips against my neck and I chuckled, "we could of been mugged out here."

Josh scoffed, "I would of beat them up." I sighed in relief hearing birds chirp. The only question I have now is, "What do we do now?"

"We could have sex in here before people start coming to the park." Josh was only joking of course,

"Maybe next time." I smiled and crawled out,

"Wait..." Josh whispered, "next time?!"


	21. A week without you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler and Josh made it home at the perfect time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THIS SHIT ISN'T EDITED I'm too lazy to edited it okay?! It's only one unedited chapter so don't hate I'm sorry sheesh.

The minute me and my Joshua walked on the doorstep of his parents his brother came out with luggage, "You ready, Josh?" He asked, Josh gave me a confused look and then my parent's car showed up, "Tyler, let's go, our plane leaves in an hour." I am confused as much as Josh now, I let go of Josh's hand and got in the backseat next to my younger brother. I watched Josh look at me with concern, 'Maybe cause he knows I don't like separating from him.' I frowned, "Where are we going? Why isn't Josh coming with us? I want Josh to be here too." My mom hushed me quickly, "Honey, we're going on a trip for a week, so is Josh's family."

My heart sunk, along with my mood, "Does Josh know...? I didn't even get to say, I'll see you soon... " I never, ever, said goodbye to Josh, saying goodbye is like saying I'll never see you again, "Hey, you'll see him soon, this is like a test." I didn't even question, I groaned instead.

The first day was okay, I did fine, second day I didn't feel like like doing anything.

The third day...

"Tyler, mom is worried about you, can you at least spend time with us? Josh would want you to." Zack stood at the edge of my hotel room bed, "Fine... " I murmured, I slipped my shoes on and filled in another empty box on the calendar, "You're keeping track?" I nodded my head. I opened the door, my sister was there, "Ty!" She hugged me tightly, "We're going to see the statue of liberty." I smiled, "Okay, cool."

The moment I've been waiting for... Josh video called me, in the middle of night. I turned my lamp on and saw Josh's smiling face, "Hey, I miss you babe," His voice was a whisper, "hold on, let me go somewhere private." The camera moved and then I saw Josh appear again in a different room, "Josh, did you know we were both leaving?" I asked, I looked at the bottom right side of my laptop. "12:02 AM... " I mumbled under my breath, Josh gave me a weird look, "No and 12:02?" I pulled the calendar out from under my pillow, filling in another box, "I'm keeping track of how many days until I see you in person again." I huddled under my blankets and Josh yawned heavenly, "That's actually kind of sweet of you." 

Josh ran his fingers through his hair, he looked so sleepy, "I can't wait to hug you." I giggled, "Sounds like a plan to me." I laid on my side, "I really wish I was there to cuddle with you, look so cute when you're comfy, like a cat, kitten." I blushed, "Are you referring to me as kitten now?" Josh fell silent, he seemed speechless, "W-well, I mean-" 

"I like it."

"Oh."

Josh laughed nervously, "I didn't expect you to say that." I smiled softly, 'He's such a sweetie.' "What are you smiling about, kitten?" I bit my lip lightly, "Don't call me kitten anymore until we see each other again." I didn't trust the devious smirk on Josh's face right now, "Does it turn you on a little?" I nodded my head, Josh was happy with my answer, "Good to know." I heard a male's voice in the background call out Josh's name. I didn't think about it until Josh's eye's looked away from the laptop, "Josh, who's there?" Josh looked back at the camera, "My friend, he's on vacation with us, he's sleeping in my hotel room too." Then the voice called out Josh again,

"I'm going to bed, Ty." My nose scrunched up slightly, "Good night, Joshua."

"I love-" I shut my laptop before he could say those three words. My mind was killing me, 'Josh is in a hotel room with another man what the hell?!' I opened my laptop again. Ready to shut it off, a skype call box appeared, I rolled my eye's and saw Josh's face. "What the fuck is you're problem? I was trying to tell you I love you!" I turned my head away, I softly whispered, 

"Are you having an affair with him?" 

I looked down at the small ring, Josh wasn't talking at all, I was slowly pulling the ring off.

"No, no I would never cheat on you, how could you think that..?" 

I stopped, "Instincts. I sure as hell don't appreciate you sleeping with others men." I slipped ring back on, I looked at the screen, my eye's fixated on Josh's smirk. "You're jealous." My nose scrunched up again, "I am not jealous! If anything, I am mad at you!" Josh's eyebrows raised but he still wore that damn smirk, "I never seen you mad before, it's hot." My face softened for a second, I blushed before shaking it off, "Would you shut up already, you're such a bastard sometimes." Josh didn't even yell back like usual.

"You are so going to get it Friday, kitten."

The last thing I saw was Josh's sexy smirk, he hung up. I sat my laptop aside and thought about what he said, 'I'm going to get it huh? Will see about that Joshua,' I curled up in my blankets blushing furiously, 'stupid Josh always saying stuff like that, whatever.' I'm still mad either way.

I waited for Friday, New York was great but I wanted to see Josh more than anything, I want to just cuss him off and get my anger out than kiss him. I can't sleep after that, I turned my laptop on and called Josh again. He picked up in bed, his tired face turned into a bright smile, "Something wrong?" He teased, I sighed in return, "I can't sleep, well, not anymore." Josh chuckled softly, "Good night, Tyler." I stopped him before he could turn his phone off, "W-wait." I muttered, catching Josh's attention, "What do you want me to do? I'm not there to help you sleep, Ty." I blushed, looking down at my lap.

"Stay up with me."

I heard nothing and then I heard movement. I looked up and saw Josh sitting up, "Sure, aren't you still mad?" I didn't answer. "I'll take that as a 'fuck off Josh' answer." Josh stayed up until I dozed off and eventually fell asleep. I woke up some time in the morning, Josh was asleep still, I looked at the screen time, "Nine hours." I mumbled, we fell asleep on Skype together for nine hours. "What are you mumbling about...?" I saw Josh's eye's open, "We fell asleep together." He wasn't shocked whatsoever, "How many more days are left?" I watched him get out of bed, relief struck me when I noticed he was fully clothed, I would of killed him if he had slept in boxers with his friend. I looked at the calendar,

"Three days."

Josh groaned, "Guess I'll have to wait."

Finally when Friday came I was excited, I was sitting in the air planewith my family. "Tyler barely came out during vacation." I listened, but I didn't care, I was seeing Josh again after a week. The second we landed I began to freak out, 'What if he doesn't like me as much anymore.' I spaced out for quite a while before my mom pulled me by mom arm, "Tyler, you've been standing there in the middle of the airport. People are going to think you're weird... try not to think of much right now please, we almost lost you." I blinked, 'How long was I out?' I still wasn't paying attention, my mom was pulling me throughout the large group of people. I saw a man in ripped skinny jeans, flannel, snapback with red hair standing at the entrance. I didn't think about it until suddenly mom let go of my arm and someone else grab my arm dragging me outside, "Josh...Josh!" I yelled, god I couldn't be more happy to see him, Josh stopped in front of his car and suddenly pressed me between him and the car, "Kitten," he roughly kissed me, his hands slipped up my shirt touching my waist. "Josh--" Wet kisses pressed against my neck, "we're in public." 

"Don't fucking talk right now."

Josh grinded against me, a small part wanted to do this right now but privately. "Josh, I'm serious, s-stop," He stopped, "Actually, I got something better planned."

I wondered where Josh was taking me. We were in the car together when I noticed bags in the back seat. "If there is a plug in there I will kill you." I threw that out again, "How long are you going to say that," Josh laughed, "it was one time!" Last year Josh bought me a plug and wrapped it up as a present for my birthday as a joke then I tried it when we first started things eventually turning into a joke. "I've noticed you space out a lot more now days," I looked over quietly, muttering words, words that probably I understood in my head, "baby, you know I can't understand you when you don't talk properly." I pressed my head against the window pane, I breathed out slowly, I felt Josh's hand rub against my knee, "I'm just worried, you've been off lately since you started getting those dreams again." I looked down at his hand, the car stopped. Josh took the key out from the ignition, opening the car door he gestured me to follow, "Come with me." I looked out Josh's side and saw a hotel, 'I forgot he wanted sex...' I got out, 'why aren't I excited...?'

Josh led me inside, taking me into a hotel room. Josh sat me down on the bed and he sat beside me, he cupped my cheeks and looked directly in my eyes, "Babe, you know I love you. Tell me what's wrong, I'll find a way to help you," I sighed, he didn't take it as a good sign, his eyes softened and I saw a frown, he pulled me closer and hugged me, "Say something, please." I cuddled into him more, "Those dreams aren't always sex, sometimes I see you die or weird things like that I don't understand." Josh hummed, he pressed his lips against my forehead, "You're scared... I'll figure something out, okay? Don't worry about it. How we take a bath together and cuddle in bed instead of sex, sound good." I nodded my head wiping tears away that I didn't even know were falling down my cheeks. Josh gave me a small reassuring smile before getting up to the bathroom. I licked my thumb and rubbed it against my wrist, make up stuck to my thumb revealing a small scar. I picked at it until Josh came back, "Don't do that," Josh than pulled my hand away staring down at my wrist, "god do I wish I met you quicker." He led me into the bathroom where he proceeded to take off my clothes.

"You know I can take my own clothes off."

"I do, I just don't care."

Josh got in the bath tub before me and I cuddled between his legs, it was nice and quiet a while. "How did you know where I was when I almost died?" I was curious, "I followed you, your mom called to tell me you were fine so I was gonna pick you up then I saw a semi so I acted on instinct." I smiled to myself, "Just wondering, thank you, Josh." After comfortable silence again, Josh and I got out. I followed behind Josh who was already sitting on the bed plugging in his phone, I tapped on his shoulder and straddled his lap, "Tyler? Are you-" I crashed my lips into his, he broke the kiss, "I told you, you don't have to do this." I smiled and shook my head, "But I want to." Josh hesitated, he pecked my lips softly, "Are you sure you-" I slipped my tongue in his mouth mid-sentence, I heard Josh squeak in surprise. Josh parted from me again, "Please, Jishwa."

Right than Josh pushed me over, straddling me, "You know I love it when you play innocent." Josh slowly licked my neck, "I-I thought you didn't want-" Josh pinned my hands above my head, "Shut up, just shut the hell up." I raised my eyebrows, I turned my head to the left and immediately felt Josh press his lips against my neck again, I moaned louder than the usual times Josh had kissed my neck. Josh's head flew up in shock then a smile spread across his face, "You're really sensitive right," he glided his tongue against my neck again and I moaned again, "there." I turned my head to face him, my face felt hot, "I didn't even know I had a sensitive spot there... " Josh sucked lightly on the spot, earning moans from me. Josh's hand slipped into my boxers when I least expected it, he slowly rubbed, I bucked my hips in anticipating, "That's not what I want, Josh." I heard him softly chuckle, "So straight forward... You must really like getting fucked huh, kitten." I blushed but still nodded my head, "Fine, but next time I'm getting a taste. Hands and knees, kitten."

I blushed bright red, 'J-Josh wants a taste next time?' I got on all fours after Josh got off me, I looked behind me and watched Josh lube his fingers, "Is that...?" Josh chuckled again, "Sweet heart, I don't want you in pain afterwards." Josh slowly entered one finger... then a second... a third and then something better. Josh thrusted agonizingly slow, until I moaned loudly, "Right there! Please go faster." Josh picked the the pace like I asked. I screamed Josh every few minutes, my face was probably burning up. I felt a hand wrap around my cock and start to pump, "Josh! Fuck. I can't." I cried, coming on Josh's hand. I felt something warm inside me and remembered, Josh used lube... ah fuck it, I collapsed on my stomach and Josh laid next to me, "You really did miss me." I gasped out, Josh cleaned off his hand before cuddling me, "I did, I stalked you're Twitter while you were gone." I laughed before burying myself under his arm and going to sleep.

We woke up and took one step outside the hotel room when a girl who was sleeping in the next room over came out, she looked at Josh and giggled,

"You must be Josh."

Josh awkwardly looked at me, my face burned red,

"You're really loud, kitten."


	22. First time for everything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Josh has never done one particular thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm thinking about adding little Joshler side-chapter that isn't necessarily part of the story. Idk maybe...

So me and Josh decided to find an apartment.

"Honestly, I think we should get an apartment without others living there."

"So a single apartment, basically a house."

"But it's cheaper. Ty. Plus, we won't get kicked out for being too loud." I thought about it, Josh has been talking about this all morning, I finally agreed after an hour of discussing it. Right now I was lying on the floor, he was laying on his bed talking about life and death. "I think if I died, I would come back to life." I laughed, "Death means you're dead dude." Josh hummed, he talked in a whisper, "But I could never leave you behind... " The room fell into silence, I stood up and got on top of Josh.

"Why are you treating me so nicely? I don't deserve this." My hands laid on Josh's chest, holding me up. Josh's eye's opened, he looked at me with the brightest smile, "You have that look on your face..." I blushed, "Face? What look?" Josh reached up, I felt his hand on the side of my head. "The one where you look innocent but guilty at the same time with a bit of shyness." A smile grew on my face, I leaned down and kissed Josh softly. "I'm not trying to be." Josh giggled at my words, "I owe it all to you." I cocked my head to the left slightly, "What did I do?"

I kissed Josh again, a little longer this time. I buried my head in his shoulder, his warm hand laid on my lower back when his phone suddenly went off. "Oh, that must be Brendon." I rolled off Josh and faced the opposite direction. "Oh, the guy you slept with, right?" I heard the small sound of something being placed on the night stand. "Ty, it's not like that, we slept in the same bed for a week, that's all, and this was going somewhere that I liked." I closed my eyes, "Well, it was bur I changed my mind." Josh poked my back, "Come on, you know me better than that, please?" I grunted in response to his words. Josh sighed, sat up and forced me onto his lap.

"Is this because you're jealous?"

"I'm not jealous!"

"Look at me when I talk to you."

"No!"

I looked at the wall to the left instead. Josh roughly grabbed my jaw with his hand and made me look at him. "Listen to me, I love you, you're my boyfriend, my world. I would never cheat on you or even think about it, we're in this life together." My eyes darted right and then left again, anywhere besides Josh's face. "Tyler, look at me." My eyes shut for a minute, then I gazed into Josh's much darker brown eyes. "What is it that you want me to say, Josh? I'm not happy with you right now." Josh sighed again. "Forget it..." Josh let go of my jaw, "just go and leave to a hotel again.... Like our usual breakups." I shook my head and slung my arms over his shoulders. "I didn't say I wanted to break up. Yeah, I'm mad, but I don't want to break up with you." Josh's face lit up while listening to me. "How about a make up kiss?" I smiled and pecked his lips twice. Our foreheads touched while Josh caressed my cheek. "You're so cute when you're mad." I glared into his eye's, "Shut up and kiss me."

Josh laughed and roughly kissed me, we stopped kissing for a mere few second only to take our shirts off and kept going. His hands slid down my sides, stopping at my belt, he unbuckled it and unzipped my pants when we heard the door open.

"Joshua, could you- Oh my lord and savior Jesus Christ!"

I pulled away, rolling off Josh's lap again. "Uh... Hi, Laura." Laura's face was in shock, "Tyler... Zip your pants up... " Josh was frozen, he looked like a child who just found out what NSFW meant. "R-right, pants. What were you saying, Laura?" Laura smiled nervously, "Could you go pick up a few things on my grocery list, if you're not busy." Josh nodded his head furiously. Josh was extremely, embarrassed the whole car ride his face was beet red, I kept quiet looking out the window. Suddenly, his hand laid on my inner thigh. "Are you really pulling this move again?" Josh parked the car in the store's parking lot and patted his lap, "what? You want me to get on your lap, right now? Where in a public area, Josh." He rolled his eye's and tugged on my shirt. "Tinted windows. Doesn't it turn you on to think about doing things in a car parking lot?" Josh grinned. I sneered at him, "No." Josh raised his eyebrow's, "Stay."

I watched him get out of the car and walk to my side, he opened the door, picked me up by the waist and got me in the back seat. "H-hey!" Josh cornered me against the door, my head rested against the window. He slipped his hands up my shirt again, touching my bare skin, _'I'm in love with this man.'_ I smiled to myself at the thought of Josh somehow liking me. "Josh, why do you love me?" Josh kissed my neck a couple times. "I'm not really sure, I just feel like this is right like this was supposed to happen. If it all goes crashing down... I know I still have you around even if I die." Josh grabbed my left hand and kissed the small ring.

"I almost died last week... You were there for me Josh, you could have died saving me. You could have died from that... With or without me right then." Josh got quiet, almost like he didn't want to think we could have died so easily. "I thought about that before too. I would have died for you, you know?" I used my sleeve to wipe off fresh tears running down my face. "Don't cry sweetheart, I love you." I nodded my head, smiling for no real reason. "You just told me you loved me in the most meaningful way. I love you too. Let's go into the store, grab the groceries and go back to your room." Josh's eye's widened a bit, his mouth opened slightly.

"You know what, you stay here and I'll go in myself." I became confused, "Why by your-" Josh quickly cut me off, "Your eyes are puffy and red, you're not going in like this." I groaned, "But being alone makes me uncomfortable, Joshie you know that, please let me go." Josh sighed and opened the door. "Fine, just um, hold my hand." I smiled, "Why?" I already knew why Josh hates me around other guys without them knowing we're dating. "I don't wanna hold hands, Josh." I watched his eye's glare into mine, I glared back, somewhat challenging him. Josh surprised me by scooting back and pulling my legs along with him.

"Whoa, what are you doing?!" My head fell onto the seat and Josh's waist was between my legs, he was directly on top of me. "You won't let me hold your hand, so I'm going to show people you're mine in another way." I moaned and gripped Josh's shoulder. He licked the small spot he found most recently, the only spot that turned me on quickly. "J-Josh! Stop, please!" Josh didn't listen, he sucked on my sweet spot until he left a dark purplish, blue hickey. "There," I heard josh say, he lifted his head up and peered down at my face. "Ty, your face is so red right now. Also, I can feel your hard."

"D-did you have to... Do that?"

Josh grinned and grazed his thumb against the fresh hickey, a small moan fell from my lips. I pushed his hand away, "Don't, it's sensitive right now." Josh chuckled.

"Will finish this at home."

We went into the store together, I was embarrassed, the hickey was clearly visible. Everyone looked at me oddly, I knew exactly why.

After that awkwardness, I went home with Josh. Josh complained about me not letting him help take in the groceries, Ashley helped instead. I forced Josh to go inside and wait for me. I leaned against the car for a moment and Ashley immediately puts her hands on my shoulders, standing in front of me. "So... How did you get the hickey?" She did the exact same thing Josh had done and grazed the hickey, I bit my lip. There was no way in hell I would let her get to me. "Do you not find me attractive enough? You look at Abigail like you look at Josh." I pushed her away and went back to grab groceries.

"I think you're pretty, but I love Josh. Abigail is a good friend, I look at her like I look at my close friends and Josh... I look at him entirely different." I grabbed the last bag and walk inside, leaving her alone. I set the bag down and walked into Josh's room casually, only to get pummeled against the wall. "What the- Joshua?!" Josh's lips smashed against mine, he lifted me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist. I moaned against his lips, he backed up until he hit the edge of the bed and sat down with me on his lap. I grabbed Josh's snapback and threw it on the ground, I pulled away gasping for air.

Josh pulled my shirt over my head and threw it on top of his hat, along with his own shirt. His tongue fought against mine again. My hands tangled in Josh's hair while he fidgeted with my belt again, he pulled away again. "Damn babe," Josh muttered under his breath. I smiled while Josh changed our position so I would be underneath him, "What about your family?" Josh chuckled softly, "You'll have to be quiet again won't you?" I ran my hand through Josh's soft hair and smiled, "I'll try." Josh smiled back, tugging my denim jeans down. I sighed in relief, Josh softly, kissed down my chest and stopped just above my boxer, "Do you think I could...?"

Josh didn't even finish his sentence for me to know what he wanted. I blushed nervously, "Y-yeah." Josh has told me countless times he's never given a blowjob in his life or ever hinted that he actually, wanted to try...

I bit the inside of my cheek, Josh looked up at me before slowly pulling my boxer's down. The second it sprung up Josh's flinched, causing me to giggle a bit. "Shut up Tyler." "Okay, I'm sorry." Josh slowly licked the underside and sucked on the tip. I moaned as quietly as possible, squirming slightly at the new feeling. Josh continued to suck and pump the base and goddamn was he good at it, he looked up at me, every now and then just to see me biting my lip harshly, trying my hardest not to scream.

My hand fisted the back of Josh's hair into a ball, surprisingly, Josh moaned. Without warning, I came and Josh's head flew up. I looked at his face, scrunched up in disgust, I knitted my eyebrows together watching Josh struggle to swallow. Finally, when he did it, he wasn't really mad, "That... That's nothing like I thought it would be. How do you always swallow?" I laughed uncontrollably, " I'm used to it." Josh chuckled along with me, took off his pants and boxer's. He sucked his fingers until they were coated and proceeded to ease one into my entrance. I gasped, "No lube?" I asked in a shaky voice. "I'm sorry baby, we're out." I clutched Josh's upper arm while he entered a second, "Oh my god Joshua!" I arched my back and heard him snicker.

I whimpered as he pulled his fingers out, he left a small kiss on my cheek. Josh pumped himself a couple times and pushed slowly into my entrance, I grunted when he went at an agonizingly slow pace, "Jooosh," I groaned. He smiled slyly and gradually thrust harder went to pounding. My mouth opened in euphoria with a series of desperate attempts to not be loud, small grunts, moans, whimpers and possibly a couple tears came out. Josh's hands were gripping my thighs harshly, enough to leave marks while my short, blunt nails were digging into his upper arm and shoulder. He came before me, but didn't stop until I also did.

Josh laid next to me, wore out. I could see why, he wasn't that rough in a while, "I thought you said you never gave a blowjob before?" I questioned curiously. "I haven't," Josh told me again. "Then how are you that good at it?" Josh laughed with a toothy smile, "I think I learned off of you."

I chuckled and cuddled up under his arm as usual, "You know..."

"I think we should get that apartment soon."


	23. Fiery glare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I don't even... freaking fifty shades lighter than grey...

I awoke sometime in the late afternoon in an empty bed. Josh left, giving me time to think, my thoughts I kept pent up inside myself. A re-occurring thought I tried to forget, crept back into my mind. I talked to Abigail privately about the thought many times. It made me sick to think about this after what just happened between me and him.

I put my clothes back on and Josh came back in the room, "Oh, you're awake now." I looked down at my feet and started crying. "What's wrong?" Josh asked in an overly concerned voice. "Can we just be friends... For a while?" I looked up at Josh, who didn't look anything more than slightly confused, upset and yet smiling. "Yeah, if that's what you want babe- I mean, dude."

I pushed pass Josh, I can't deal with any of this. I walked straight to Abigail's room to fall apart, "Abby, I somewhat broke up with Josh..." She turned her tv off and invited me to sit with her.

"Okay, so, you broke up with Josh cause you need to think about where this relationship is going and you don't want to weigh him down with your problems?"

I blinked, wow she's good at figuring things out... "How did you..." She laughed and patted my knee, "Tyler, I'm one of close friend's, I know you pretty well by now. I do on the other hand think you and Josh breaking up is good." I pursed my lips at her, "I thought you said it was good that we were dating." Abigail giggled, "I meant it's good your splitting for a little while, sometimes when that happens either you fall back in love, break up forever or come together stronger than before." Breakup forever... Dammit.

Josh was awkward as hell at first, after a day or so he became more like how we originally were, best friends. Spending time with Josh was fun, we spent today just playing video games, three days in without a problem. "Hey, dude?" I heard Josh say while pausing the game of Mario kart. "Yea?" I smiled happily. "Why did you want to break up?" My smiled vanished, turning neutral, "Why did you not get upset when I did?" I retorted. "I was... I cried for a while, but I'm fine now, sort of." I killed me to know Josh does cry over me, I looked at Josh playing with a button on his shirt, "I um, broke up because I'm getting you involved with my inner thoughts and... I'm just gonna go." I got up and Josh grabbed my hand. I looked down at our hands and then locked eyes with Josh, "Sorry."

I blushed and withdrew my hand, "N-no, it's okay." I walked towards the door and Josh stopped me, "Are you going to Abigail's room...?" I shook my head, I decided to invite Josh, "Do you want to go get coffee with me? I'm going to Starbucks." Josh smiled, "Yes." We walked together and I already spaced out, Josh and I were in the awkward ex's but yet, still best friends.

"I do still love you."

 

 

After buying our usual coffees Josh turned the opposite way of our home, "You're going the wrong way, Josh." He turned around, walked up to me with a stern look, grabbed my free hand and started pulling me down the street. "Josh!" I wasn't sure what was going on. "We're going home." I noticed Josh holding my hand again and started blushing. Finally, after dragging me up and down streets he stopped in front of a small house, "I know it's not much nor a dream home, but-" I quickly put my coffee on the ground and hugged Josh tightly, "I love it! It's perfect for us!"

He hugged me back, the hug lasted longer than it should have. Josh opened the door for me and I realized, everything was already set up, "Did you... Did you move everything here by yourself?" Josh smiled at me and pointed at a box on the kitchen table, "Not everything, I got your stuff this morning and brought it here, I didn't read your journal, though." I smiled and told Josh I would get the rest of our stuff we left at his parent's.

It probably took a good... Whole day.

I got our stuff

I also went to Starbucks again

Then off to the mall

And spent a long time with Abigail.

So when I came home it was pitch black. I had seven bags in my hands, I opened to door and heard footsteps in the bedroom, 'Must be Josh' I turned on the kitchen light and the door opened, "Tyler! Why the fuck were you gone all day?! Did you sleep with another guy? Oh, my fucking gosh! I'm going to kill you and him!" I blinked, Josh was fueled by anger. He came up to me and grabbed my neck, slightly gripping. "Josh!" I moaned out, "you can't just- I didn't sleep with another man, it shouldn't even matter," I blushed when he backed me up against the table. "No, it fucking does! I still love you, you dumb ass. Look at you, left all day when you should be home with me and now you're moaning for me? You slut." I blushed bright red,

"I-I'm really sorry, I really didn't sleep with anyone I swear." Josh let go of my neck and became oddly quiet. I stared deep into his eyes, "Do I weigh you down and make you feel bad?"

"No Tyler, you drive me absolutely crazy," Josh then grabbed the back of my head and tugged my head back by my hair, "why do you ask?" I moaned again, "still being a slut Tyler, you're enjoying this aren't you?" I swallowed hard and didn't break eye contact, "Fuck. You." The corner of Josh's mouth twitch, he leaned in close, only inches away from our lips touching, "I'm sorry? Did you just say fuck you to me?" Josh pulled harder until he heard me whimper, "Answer my damn questions."

"I asked 'cause I still love you."

"Then date me again so I know you're mine and nobody else's."

"I'll think about it." Josh scoffed at me, "What it's been nearly a week? I'm not waiting any longer." I laid my hands on his shoulders, "let go of my hair," Josh let go, "you know how I feel about our relationship, it's beautiful and sweet but it's also terrifying and hard, we always break up... This isn't what I want Josh." Josh sighed and nodded his head, "I understand, just say the words and I'll leave you alone about it." I laughed softly, "You think you understand, but you really don't. I never said I wouldn't take you back," I softly kissed his cheek and smiled slightly. Josh remained confused, "Do you love me or not?"

"I do, but what if we're not supposed to be together? What if none of this is right and we're just blinded."

"Don't say that Tyler, you know better," Josh hugged me with just enough tightness to where I felt safe for once, "I told you I'll figure this out for us and I meant it." I started crying, small sobs came from me and Josh just kept his arms around me. My tears wetted Josh's shirt, "Shhh, I'm here Sweetheart, I'm not going anywhere, " I cried even harder, hearing Josh call me sweetheart while holding me made me feel... Happy. I clung to Josh's shirt like it was my lifeline, Josh picked me up and carried me into our new bedroom. He sat down and didn't let go, I sat there on his lap, a total wreck. "Ty, I love you." he nuzzled into my neck, I couldn't help but smile, "Hey Josh," I muttered quietly, Josh moved his head and looked into my eyes, showing he was paying attention, "kiss me."

I can't do it, I can't go without Josh around, it's impossible. Josh's smile right now was one I'd never forget, his eyes gleamed beautifully from a dimly lit room, even his hair was just stunningly perfect. I watched him lean in and softly kiss me, it's so much better to be alone with him instead of with a group. I pulled away from Josh and realized I had forgotten how much I really did need him. I looked down and remembered him, giving me a promise ring, "You didn't take your's off either, huh?" His eyes averted to his ring, "Oh... Yeah, I couldn't bring myself to take it off." I smiled and flicked a small red, curl of hair away from his forehead, "I love you too, should we try again?" Josh's eyes suddenly had a spark in them, "Yes."

I know I'm never going to feel like I don't weigh him down. But I should at least stay with him.

Josh and I just lay in bed together, talking about our opinions about us breaking up for those few days. "Seriously, if you hadn't asked to try having a relationship again I was gonna resort to begging, " I laughed with him, I can't imagine Josh begging, "but did you sleep with anyone when you left all day?" I cuddled into Josh's side, "You're still stuck on that? No, I didn't sleep with anyone, I was out with Abigail." Josh sighed in relief, pleased with my answer, "By the way... You didn't tell me you were into choking and hair pulling, kinky." My heart stopped, I totally forgot I moaned so much when Josh did that despite doing it out of anger, "I can't explain that, or liking being called a slut," I heard him snicker, "why is that funny?"

Josh held the hand I had laid on his chest, "I never mentioned a word about calling you a slut besides when I was mad, you just told on yourself." I turned over, 'Why did I even say that?' I curled up, bringing my knees up. I closed my eyes, attempting to fall asleep, I felt his hand on my shoulder. I flicked his hand off, "No." Josh stayed still for a moment, I felt the bed shift, realizing Josh turned the opposite direction.

I drifted to sleep and had another sex dream that ended in a nightmare. Josh had died in an accident at the end.

"Tyler, come here."

My eyes opened slightly, I was sure Josh said something. "Tyler, come here, " my eyes fully opened, I sat up and Josh pulled me back down, "what's wrong? Ty, you were crying a minute ago." I felt my face, he was right. My face was damp then I recalled Josh died, "Josh..." I was so happy when he talked, "I'm here sweetheart." I cuddled back into his side, "You died... In my dream, you died." Josh stayed still, "It was just a dream, I'm still alive." Tears pricked my eyes, "But it looked so real."

I gasped, Josh had me on my back with him on top, "I'm right here, I'm here every night with you babe, I'm always here." I looked him straight in the eyes, "But never in the morning... It's an empty bed almost every morning." I watched him take my hand and kiss it softly, "You know I have to work from five to nine every morning."

"Not on weekends like tomorrow."

Josh stayed quiet, probably cause he knows I'm right. Even on weekends, he's gone in the morning.

"I'm sorry, Ty."

"You're sorry? That's it? I love cuddling with you every night, then we have sex, you get what you want and then I wake up to nothing, isn't that a damn shame."

"I never knew you felt that way... I don't want you for sex, I love you, no, I'm in love with you. If you don't want to have sex anymore, just tell me, I'll still love you and I have my hand still."

I laughed and quickly caught myself, I'm supposed to be mad still. "That's not what I mean Josh, I just wonder where you go." Joshed pressed his lips on mine for a moment, "Don't worry about it, there's a reason." Soft lips pressed against my neck and I pushed Josh away, "I don't- it's been a while, Josh, I don't know if I want to jump back into this." The smile he had was different from his usual warm welcoming one, those same lips pressed on my neck again, "Feels good, doesn't it?" I let out a shaky breath, "Stop p-please." Josh bit down on my collarbone leaving a small mark, "You want this as much as I want this," he suddenly grabbed my throat and I froze, "you're into this right? You liked it earlier." I swallowed harshly, staring into Josh's eyes, I saw the fire but still love in them, maybe... A combination of both,

Fiery passion?

My toes curled, Josh applied pressure on my throat, Josh was choking me. I whimpered, I shouldn't like it, it's wrong. Josh choked me until I gasped for air, "You're really a slut for me, aren't you?" Josh pulled my hair eliciting a moan, "well? Aren't you?" I was in a daze, heavy breaths and gasps, "I am." Josh peered down at me, kissed my chest and slowly trailed down to my stomach, "Say it like you mean it." I moaned and bit my lip, my hand entangled with the back of his curly hair "Please just fuck me already."

Josh stopped, his eyes looked up at me as he kissed my hip bone, "You haven't said what I wanted yet." I blushed and followed through, "I-I'm a slut only for you and only you, nobody else." Josh smiled, he kissed me softly and tugged my boxers down, "Much better. Let's try a different position, hands and knees," I hesitated to do so, "trust me, babe, I would never hurt you, unless it's something minor like," Josh grabbed my hair again and tugged, "this." I moaned, my face was flushed red. Josh kissed my shoulder and bit down, "You're a beautiful person Ty, you look even better with marks all over you." Something about how Josh talks and looks at me all the time makes me feel safe. "Of course, I trust you, " Josh kissed my shoulder before turning me around and roughly pushing me down on all fours, "but I'm still a bit mad."

I shivered, the feeling of coldness touched my entrance, "Josh, I swear to god if that's a-" I was cut short, "Shut up or I'll take you on the wall. It's just cold lube." I heard clothing fall to the floor into the small pile already there. Josh entered himself slowly, my mouth gaped open, he did his usual slow at first pace but this time, he brought more sensuality with it. Small love bites to gentle kisses, I felt him leave them all over my upper back and behind my ear, "Jesus, Josh! Where did you learn to do this?" I moaned.

I lost all my self-control to him, the bites hurt a bit, but they felt so good at the same time. "It's not important now. What is important is you getting the attention you desire and deserve," he whispered in my ear. I moaned louder, Josh more than likely knew what it meant when my voice would get to whimpers and gasps, "That was quick, I found it already." Suddenly Josh started pounding without a warning. I gripped the pillow in front of me and my moans would squeak sometimes.

I had no idea where any of those noises came from, I never heard them before and I'm the one making them. My eyes shut tightly, Josh had grabbed my hair once more and pulled it harder than before. The feeling in my stomach felt heavy, warmth shot inside me and I felt the heavy feeling burst along with possibly the loudest moan I've ever done. Collapsed on my stomach with Josh beside me. "I... Am so happy right now," I looked over at my lover who was already biting his lip impatiently, he licked his lips and still had fire in his eyes, "Josh...?"

I then felt Josh start kissing me again and my eyes widen, he lifted me up out of bed with him and slammed me against the wall, "but we just-" My eyes locked with his for a moment before he wrapped my legs around his waist and entered again. Josh started pounding again while he abused my soft spots on my neck, my eyes shut tightly again as my arms loosened around his neck. I thought I already experienced Josh going as hard as he could, I... Was wrong.

I screamed, I felt like if Josh got any faster or hit harder I would break. At this point my body gave up, all the moans in the world couldn't have added up to the ones I was letting out. Finally, I felt warm inside again and I released with it. "Well, you look tired." I nodded my head to Josh in response, I barely felt like even doing that, I was done for. Josh kindly carried me to the bed and sucked on my earlobe, "I can't... I can't-" I was cut short by Josh entering me again. I lost my mind, I couldn't think straight at all, my legs are numb and somehow maintained a smirk and those eyes... I just couldn't get enough of them.

He thrust until we both released at the same time and he laid next to me, "Satisfied?" I couldn't reply, my face was flushed red, my body felt like jello and I felt hot and sweaty, "Guess you learned the meaning of getting fucked senselessly, such a slut to be able to take all of that three times in a row." He pulled me next to him and cuddled me, I drifted, no, I blacked out. I didn't have a dream like usual, I just woke up and besides for my legs, I felt amazing.

I thought about last night for a moment and realized, it felt exactly like my dreams about it. Did it even really happen?

That was the best sleep I had in years, though. I looked at the clock and it was ten in the morning, but something else caught my eye.

Josh is still in bed with me.

I looked up from my current position, lying on Josh's chest. Josh was right there. He woke up and looked at me, I noticed the flame had burned out.

"Good morning, sweetheart, did you enjoy last night?" I froze and his words,  
It really did happen, "That wasn't a dream?"

"Nope, that happened."

I hugged Josh tightly and kissed him, "Josh, that was the greatest sex we've ever had together, it was so different and exciting." Josh laughed and hugged me back,

"As long as you're happy, babe."


	24. A/N + mini side chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I decided when I do A/N's I'm throwing in mini side chapters okay?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woop Woop Woop ~ I'm leaving for minimal three days (hopefully) to my uncle's and to see the Twenty One Pilots concert for the second time. There won't be any new chapters within the three days BUT I'll have one ready by the time I'm home *Low key writes during car ride*

I'm cooking dinner and Josh is in our room. I set the table and heard mumbling and a ukulele being played, "Weird... I don't have my ukulele here, it's still at Josh's old room." I walked into our room and saw Josh, "When I was a young boy, my father took me into the city to see a marching band, he said son when you grow up will you be, the savior of the broken the beaten and the-" I raised my eyebrow, "Josh, are you playing my uke?" Josh looked down at my ukulele and then at me, "N-no! Are you wearing an apron?!" He said in a hurry. "Yes, Josh, I am wearing an apron, and when did you learn to play my ukulele?" Josh looked nervous, chucked my ukulele on the bed and pushed past me.

I blinked, _'That was weirder than Josh sticking that baby carrot up his nose... '_ I thought about it for a moment and realization hit me, Josh was singing Black Parade on a ukulele....

 

"Joshua! How the fuck did you play Post-hardcore, Punk rock on a damn ukulele?!"

 

"I only know that one song on a ukulele okay?!"


	25. The past is present

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> DO NOT read is you are easily triggered by self-harm, blood or depression. Sorry, this is a shorter chapter than usual.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back!

Josh and I had been on bad terms all day, we wake up grumpy and started arguing about minor things. But Josh was extremely upset that I didn't tell him I was leaving to New York again with my family. Our argument kept on until it escalated to where I slapped Josh and he almost instinctively punched my face, his eyes widened as if he didn't expect to do that. I groaned in pain while covering my mouth, "Are you fucking kidding me, Josh?!" I held out my hand, revealing blood, "I-I hate you!" I ran up the stairs and locked myself in the bathroom. I looked into the mirror and saw the blood trickling down my chin. Josh had busted my lip. I washed my lip and heard Josh banging on the door, "Tyler, I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" I ignored him.

"Ty, don't hate me, please. Tyler, let me in! I love you too damn much to let you leave!" I felt fresh tears drip onto the back of my hand. I didn't talk back, what am I supposed to say? I cried over him, I learned to love from him, I learned how emotional I really am because of him. But what if everything I learned is wrong?

I cracked the door open, Josh was on the floor with his knees prompt up, his face was tucked into his knees and he was crying, "Ty, what happen to us?" I couldn't take it, there's some part of me that wants to make this work, I would be alone, entirely alone, if Josh wasn't here to keep my mind on the right track I would end my life. "Is this love or just desire...?" I keep trying to save us, the memories of how I met Josh, how I ended up falling in love with him, our first kiss, everything, flooded back into my mind.

_"Hi, I'm Josh," the red haired boy held out his hand. "I'm Tyler," I grabbed his hand and his smile, his smile was beautiful, I'll remember it forever._

I never was lonely after that encounter.

_3am and I'm walking down the street upset with my backpack. I saw a familiar car stop next to me, "Tyler? Dude, why are you walking this early?" I looked in the window and saw Josh's concerned expression. "I lost my apartment this morning." I heard the car unlock and Josh smiled, "Get in, you can stay with me."_

I never parted from Josh that day.

_Josh pressed his lips against mine within the first week we stay together, and then again the next day._

I was so happy then.

I met and stayed with his family with him for a while and we started dating, pretending to be married, making plans together.

Now I'm broken.

"It's never been desire, but this isn't love either," Josh spoke in a mumble. I looked at my lip in the mirror and poked it, it wasn't too bad, it hurt a little, but nothing severe. I ignored Josh until I heard words only Josh could tell me and mean it with all of his heart, "I can't believe I hurt you, the only person I ever really liked and I fucked it up over you going to New York for three days. The truth is I know I love you, I really do, enough to where I want to just grab a blanket, sit on the couch and have you all snuggled up next to me. I really need you, I'm never going to find someone like you, I love you," I stayed quiet and Josh started talking again. "Fuck it, we're getting married one day, I promised you a daughter and a happy life, you're getting your damn happy ending if it's the last thing I do!"

I cracked the door again, Josh was still sitting against the wall, crying into his knees. I opened the door and sat on my knees in front of him, "I need you too." Josh looked at me, his concerned expression caught my attention, "Your lip... I busted your lip." I smiled and pressed my lips on his neck, "Ty, what are you doing?" Josh's hand rested on my shoulder, I pulled his bow tie off. "Josh..." I nipped his ear lightly before looking at his face, he was blushing, his eyes were half-lidded with his sweet lips parted and wild hair. He looked so perfect like this.

"Josh, if you stay with me then I'll have my happy ending, it's a nightmare when you're gone. You really hurt me though Josh, but I forgive you." Josh glanced at my lips before looking into my eyes, "But why? Why do you forgive me every time? I'd do anything to keep from hurting you. I think you need to move on Tyler, this isn't fair to you."

My stomach dropped, 'How could Josh say that? Doesn't he love me?' I scoffed and forced Josh to let me cuddle between his legs, though he wouldn't put his arms around me. "I don't know why I can't move on." Josh growled in annoyance, "You do know why you just won't tell me." I leaned back into Josh's chest, "Fine... I don't want to leave you because I think I would just go back to how I was before I met you," I sighed and played with the loosened string off of my sleeve.

Silence.

 _'I shouldn't have said that...'_ I feared the possibility Josh might be willing to leave any second now. I didn't even care that he hit me, I just didn't want him to leave me alone. I thought about getting up and just hiding away, I hate the silence so much. I feel insecure, vulnerable, unsafe, disgusting, I have no idea why either. I always try to block out the evil thoughts, the thought of just over-dosing or cut myself upstream, everyone would be happier without me.

This was my intentions, I decided to overdose. I was starting to get up and Josh wouldn't let me, he held me in his arms, "Don't you dare do it." I glanced to the side and spoke almost like I was already dead, "Do what...?" Josh tightly held me close to him, "I know what you're thinking, I know you. You're not doing it, you're especially not going back to the old way. Don't even fucking say that shit to me," he pulled my sleeve up, "this is not the way to go Ty."

"Just let me go to the bathroom, I won't do-"

"You're lying."

He knew me that well, he could tell I was lying so easily. "Josh, just let me-" Josh instantly refused, "No, I'm not letting you go. I take it all back, stay with me, stay here." He kept talking to me, occupying my thoughts. He turned me around to face him and kissed my forehead, "I love you." I couldn't quite find the words to say, I only looked at him, "Tyler, if you don't talk to me, I won't let you go." I weakly squirmed as a small attempt to leave, he wouldn't let me, he only held me down on the floor. The moment we toppled over, he looked so serious, "What do you want from me?" I asked quietly. "Promise you're not going to do anything drastic and you won't hurt yourself," he said concerned. I nodded, "I promise."

He let me go and I bolted downstairs, "Babe, wait!" Josh called from behind me, I opened the door and ran to my car, still having Josh following behind me, I turned on the ignition and left. _'I promised, I promised, I promised'_ I kept thinking it over again, I stayed in a different hotel from the usual one Josh finds me in every time. I don't want him to see **this**.

I checked into the hotel and the first thing I did was break down and cry for hours. I walked into the bathroom and decided to take a bath, after filling the bathtub I got in. Minutes felt like hours of silence, it was dark outside, too dark to go home. I felt disgusting again, my skin crawled with agony, I hated myself, enough to break the one thing I was holding onto.

The dull pain I haven't felt since years ago touched my skin, I only did it several times, they were deep, just like my thoughts. I then remembered, _'I promised Josh I wouldn't do anything drastic'_ my eyes grew wide and I dropped the small object in the tub, my body trembled, I screamed on the inside, beneath my skin was torture. I cried and became panicked, I screamed only loud enough for me to hear it.

I looked down at my wrist and clawed it repeatedly, only agitating it more. I shoved my wrist under the water and scratched it frantically, I cried and laughed at the same time. The water dyed in red, cleansed me, at least I believed so, I stood up from the pool of red and washed my wrist in the sink. I unplugged the bathtub and watched the red drain out, even after that I still clawed at my upper arms and dug my nails in as hard as possible, I pulled my hair and hurt myself in any way possible.

I _burned_ my thoughts away with a lighter,

I _cut_ off the insecurity,

I _pulled_ my demons out,

I _**bled**_ my sins away....

Until I finally bruised my innocents.

I cried and left the hotel that night, I got in my car again and drove off. I didn't know where or have any plans I just drove off, admiring the stop lights and head lights. I yelled at myself and saw a car that looked familiar to me, I adjusted my rear view mirror, but I still couldn't see the driver. I stopped at a bar, I wasn't supposed to, I'm not even a drinker.

The bar wasn't too full, not enough to make me feel scared. My sleeves hid my new secret, I can't even tell Josh this one. I drank until I couldn't see properly, everything was blurry, people looked blurry, everything looked blurry. Two men came up to me and one of them guided me to their car, while the other one took my keys. The guy shoved me into the car and buckled me in before he drove off with me.

He kept talking to me and shaking my shoulder, I didn't hear him very well, he sounded like he was talking underwater to me. He pulled into a driveway and rushed to get me out of the car, the guy helped me into the house since I was stumbling and sat me on the bed. I watched the second blurry figure walk in, he shoved a pill in my mouth and made me drink water. Eventually, the man hugged the second guy who ended up leaving. I didn't fight him, he carefully took my jacket off, he threw the blankets over me and sat next to me, watching me until I passed out.

My head throbbed, my body ached and my wrist burned. I woke up with the biggest hangover, the first thing I did was check to see if I had everything and noticed I was home, I stood up and rushed to the bathroom, I think I threw up my insides.

I felt terrible, I betrayed Josh but breaking our promise and ended up drunk, I don't even know how I got here. I walked dizzily back to bed and the same man from last night came in. "How are you feeling, baby?" I looked up at him, he sat down next to my laid down body position and ran his fingers through my hair, "I'm glad you're not hurt." I hummed lightly, his touch was soft and sweet like cotton candy, "I'm okay, Josh. I'm sorry for everything."

Josh kissed my forehead and smiled, "I'm sorry I hit you. I'm just happy you didn't die from alcohol poisoning, you were drinking pretty heavy. You slurred so much I don't even think you were actually talking." my stomach suddenly churned again and I bolted to the bathroom, threw up again, this time, I heard Josh talking outside the door, "You're so stupid it's actually becoming adorable."

Josh walked up to me and kneeled down next to me, I raised my head and looked at him, "Don't look at me, I don't want you to see me like this." Josh sighed and smiled at me, "I've seen worse from you." I started tearing up, I don't even know why I felt like bursting into tears, "I said don't!" he concerningly looked at me and wiped away my tears, "Hey, I have to like you a lot to be able to sit next to you while your liver is giving up on you, so shut the hell up."

I stopped crying, I giggled instead. He makes everything somehow a joke, I love it, I loved him.

Half the day Josh was more than happy to care for me, he refused to let me get up unless it was necessary. After my hangover past by I still brushed my teeth for the seventh times repeatedly since I didn't want to kiss Josh like that and threw away my toothbrush. I thought Josh was busy, but I guessed wrong, I took off my shirt and he walked in, "What... The fuck is that... TYLER! Are you serious?! Are you being fucking SERIOUS right now?!"

I quickly put my shirt back on, "What? I-I was just changing!" Josh pinned me down on the bed and rolled up my sleeves, "You cut yourself again! Shit, are those burn marks?! You said you wouldn't do anything like this, you promised." I started crying, I don't even trust myself anymore, "I'm sorry... I'm so, so, sorry, Josh, I didn't mean for it to end up like this... "

Josh stared at my wrist, was he... crying? He touched the marks, causing me to wince in pain, "Tyler, why do you do this to me? I can't help but love you and you're a sick person, why is it every time you leave I come back for you... " Josh looked at my tear stained face and kissed my wrist without breaking eye contact. "I need you to stop this, stop hurting yourself." I shook my head and felt a warm teardrop on my cheek, Josh's tear. He kissed me gently, "I want you to say you won't, and mean it this time. I never want to see this happen again."

I nodded my head, he smiled at me, a painful smile and kissed my wrist again, "Good. I missed you, though, the real you." I smiled softly, "You do know I love you, right?" Josh nodded his head and licked my wrist, my eyes widened in surprise, mostly at how it oddly felt nice and that Josh would even do that, "What was that for?" He licked it again and chuckled, "You aren't complaining, does that mean you like it?" My mouth opened, the heat rose to my face, "W-well, I um... "

"You are one freaky person, but I love you either way."

Josh kissed my jaw line until he reached my ear, "Wait, don't-" I bit my lip, his tongue slowly licked behind my ear and began to suck on the lobe. His hands inside my shirt and slid up my bare sides. Everything just stopped. Josh got off me with a twisted smile, "Wanna cuddle and watch a movie together?" I inhaled deeply and exhaled, "You frickin' tease."

I stood up with him and pushed Josh against the wall and roughly kissed him, I kissed his neck softly until I felt something poke my thigh. I stepped back and got on my knees. "Ty..." I smiled up him, I undid his belt and stood back up, "Yeah, no." The second I turned around, Josh had me against the other wall, his chest pressed against my back with his arms around my waist. The shot of pain, Josh bit harshly on my ear, I yelped, "Ouch!" I felt teeth nipping at the exposed parts of my neck.

I whimpered, Josh pulled away and walked into our closet, "Josh? What'cha doing?" Not even a minute later he came back with a blanket and pillows. We walked to the living room and I watched him turn on Netflix and turn off the lights, "I mentioned that I wanted to cuddle with you on the couch yesterday, make up cuddles?" I died on the inside, his lip puffed out slightly with his eyebrows knitted together. He was pouting. He sat on the couch and kept making that face at me, "Cuddles?" My heart sank, he even did the childish voice.

I walked to the couch and almost sat next to him, I changed my mind. I snuggled between Josh's legs on the couch and he pulled the covers over me, "Can we watch Silver Linings Playbook?" Josh chuckled and clicked it, he cuddled me nearly to death. We watched a half hour or so and that's when Josh tickled my sides, "Cut it out Joshua!" I squealed, Josh stopped, "I can't help it, your laugh is so cute." His hand slid beneath my jeans and was playing with the elastic waistband of my boxers. I blushed crazily while Josh was calm.

I gently grabbed Josh's wrist, the small gasp of shock hit me, Josh's hand was halfway past my waistband. It's hard to think we were fighting just an hour ago, and now this. I whimpered again, Josh took his hand away, he wrapped his arm around my waist and kissed my cheek softly, "Really..." Josh smiled and nuzzled his face into my neck, "Tomorrow, sweetheart, I promise tomorrow." I growled in annoyance, "But now I want to do it, you can't just do that and leave me hanging."

"I can and I will."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My specialty is emotional trash.


	26. A/N - mini chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you're reading this then you're probz only here for the min chapter lmao

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> But seriously you are, I know you are.

First I decided to write another special chapter (Tyler/Josh/Celia) 'cause a lot of you liked it so I'm writing that for the next chapter.

 

Onwards to the mini chapter! ~(-3-)~

* * *

 

"Tyler, Tyler wake up... GET UP." My face suddenly hit it the carpet and I just laid there, "Go away, I'm tired." Josh poked me and spoke softly, "I'm not going to work at the mall today..." My eyes shot open, I quickly sat up and looked at him, "Does that mean?" Josh smiled and nodded his head, "Does this mean, we can do that one _thing_ I love so much again?" I bit my lip and looked at him through half-lidded eyes. "Can we do _it_ now?" Josh smiled slyly, "Get on the bed and take off your clothes."

I did as Josh said and he turned on the tv.

"Oh fuck!" Josh yelled. "I'm almost there!" I screamed, I finished first and Josh finished second, "That was intense." Josh threw his controller on the pillow, "Why are you so good at this?"

I laughed looking at the tv screen, "I'm the king of _mario_ _kart_." Me and Josh made a whole day of playing video games and eating food in our underwear together.

* * *

 

Yeah, you perv I bet you thought something else was happening


	27. Special Chapter: One night out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Over 200 which means, another married Tyler and Josh with Celia chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I couldn't update, school started in last week -_-

"Celia?" I heard Josh call out from the living room, they were playing hide and seek while I decided to make spaghetti for dinner. "Hey, babe? Have you seen Celia in here? I can't find her." I turned around and met Josh who was searching under the table, "Nope, try looking in the closets." Josh nodded his head and walked closer to me, he stopped and fell over. Celia had jumped out of the kitchen sink cabinet next to me onto Josh, "You're terrible at this game."

Josh looked up at me with a glare, "I thought you said you hadn't seen her." I smiled and went back to work, "Yeah, I lied." Celia ran off again, leaving Josh behind, "So what's for dinner?"

Okay honestly, I suck at cooking spaghetti.

I stared down at the pot of 'spaghetti' and fluttered my eyes, "Um..." I grabbed the handle with a dish towel and dumped out burnt up spaghetti into the trash can. Josh looked at me strangely, I looked at the inside of the pot and it was burnt to the point it was no good anymore, "Uhhh..." I pretty much dropped the pot in the trash can and then leaned on the counter like nothing happened. Josh was just standing there with his mouth open and wide-eyed. "Chipotle, we're having chipotle for dinner," I threw off the old, worn apron I had since the beginning of living with Josh and Josh was still in shock.

"What did you do to the damn pot?" I watched Josh grab the pot from the trash and examine it, "Was this supposed to be spaghetti?"

A few hours later after eating take out, I went to make sure Celia was okay and I stood at the door frame, Josh was sitting on the bed with Celia, facing away from me, talking. I stayed and listened to them, folding my arms and leaning on the door frame. "How come you're fearless Dad? Have you ever been scared before?" I rolled my eyes and smiled, knowing Josh was going to say "No, I'm fearless" or something like that. "I'm not fearless, I'm scared of a lot of things Angel."

I raised my eyebrows, "Like what? Ghost scare me and spiders too." Josh chuckled and sat her down on his lap, "Well, I'm scared of losing Tyler, you and that maybe one day... He'll find someone better than me and leave... But if you were gone me and your daddy would be scared, because we love you." I smiled and felt a wave of emotion coming along. "But Daddy loves you, why would he leave?" She asked, in her curious voice. "Celia, sometimes, couples get mad at each other for dumb reasons and they split up, we've been through that a lot. Will never leave each other without coming back, though, so will always be a happy family."

I shed a few tears listening to them, he is still such a sweet guy. "Do you and Daddy fight a lot?" Josh smiled and kissed her forehead, "Not much anymore, when we argue now it's just us being an old, cranky married couple." Celia laughed and got off Josh's lap, "Daddy!" She squealed looking directly at me. Josh turned his head around and put Celia to sleep, "Bedtime kid, or else you won't have the energy to stay awake with Aunt Abigail tomorrow." Celia smiled, she kissed Josh's cheek and cuddled up to our dog Riley.

Josh walked out, shutting the door behind and pinned me up against the wall, "How much did you hear?" I blushed, "Enough to know you still care about me." Josh chuckled and kissed just below my ear, "You shouldn't eavesdrop." Josh lifted me up, I wrapped my legs around his waist and pecked his lips, "I'm technically the wife in this marriage, I get the right to eavesdrop on you." Josh laughed, arms tightly wrapped around my waist. He carried and sat me down one the couch, "God, you still carry the same effect on me that you had the first day we kissed, Ty."

I smiled and snuggled up to Josh, "Really?" He nodded his head and threw his arm around me, "Of course, you're my precious angel. I couldn't feel more happy with anyone else but you and Celia." My eyes averted to the small footsteps that stopped in the doorway, "Daddy, I can't sleep... Can you sing me a song?" I looked at Josh for a second and got up, "Sure, what would you like to hear?" I grabbed her much smaller hand and took her back to her room, tucking her in then kissing her forehead.

I dug around in her drawer and found my old ukulele I gave her when she told me she wanted to learn to play like I did. "You chose a song this time." My mind went blank, I didn't know what to sing, "Um, oh! I got one!" Celia smiled brightly, reminding me of Josh's smile. I strummed the ukulele and smiled down at my daughter, "Why do you build me up, build me up Buttercup, baby, just to let me down and mess me around and then worst of all you never call, baby, when you say you will but I love you still. I need you, I need you more than anyone, darlin' You know that I have from the start. So build me up, build me up Buttercup, don't break my heart."

Celia closed her eyes and I stayed to watch her fall asleep. I ran my fingers through her bangs and kissed her forehead again, before leaving. My squeaked, I was pulled to the side by my waist, meeting my husband's signature smile, "You're just so damn perfect." I blushed and felt those angelic lips pressed against my cheek, "Josh, you're dotting on me again." He held me close and swayed us side to side, "I'm not doting on you, I'm flirting with you." I quickly took a step back and laughed hysterically, "Why? We've been married for like 3 or 4 years." Josh rolled his eyes, still smiling, "Because, I want to and I like to keep my baby pleased." I smiled curiously, I took off to the kitchen.

"Ty?" I heard Josh call out behind me, I ignored him and proceeded to draw on a piece of paper. I drew it perfectly, I filled it in with the color red, wrote my name in the middle and cut it out. I turned around to face Josh, "What're you doing babe?" I flashed a smile towards the ground and held a piece of paper in front of me, "Giving you my heart." I heard a sigh along with the paper being taken away from my slightly shaking hands. "I want more." I raised my head in confusion, "I can't give you more, I have nothing else to give." Josh grabbed both of my hands and held them, "Sure you do, I want you." I blinked, I wasn't quite sure what that meant, "Are you like, saying you want me to give up myself to you?" He laughed and shook his head, "No, I just want you."

He grabbed my waist again and leaned in to kiss me, the doorbell rang and Josh sighed, "Dammit." I kissed his nose and went to open the door, "Josh, Abigail's here."

Abbi came in and sat on the second couch across from me and Josh, "Guys, you should go out and do something tonight, I can watch Celia." I thought about it and before I had a say so Josh interrupted, "We could go party." I took a drink of water and shook my head, "No, I don't do parties, their too crowded, and since when do you party? You have anxiety." He gently bit my jawline and kissed my neck softly, "I used to party a lot, I should take you with me." I tried moving away from Josh to prevent further more flirtatious acts and was quickly pulled onto his lap, trapped in his arms, "Josh, Abbi is right here." I looked at Abigail, she was smiling and making 'Aww' sounds at us, "You guys are so cute together!"

I freaked out and started pulling away from Josh, "Let me go." Eventually, he did, he went to grab something to drink and I glared at him, "You shouldn't be mad at him Ty, he does things like that 'cause he likes you." I scoffed at her and turned my attention to Josh is the kitchen. He looked happy for some reason, he placed his soda on the counter and stood there thinking. I found it weird, he suddenly looked at me for a moment, smiling, I shyly smiled back and looked at Abigail, "Ooh, go talk to the popular boy in school." I giggled and she playfully kicked me with her foot, "Come on, we aren't in high school anymore, we're old now."

Abigail smiled, "Gee, you're like, 29, you're so old Ty." I flashed a sarcastic smile and she kicked me again, "Seriously, talk to the popular boy," she teased. I watched her stand up, "Hey Joshie, I'm going to Celia's room." She winked at me and walked away wiggling her eyebrows at me, I covered my face in embarrassment. "Eh?" I uncovered my eyes and seen my loving husband, his hips between my legs, his arms pressed down onto the couch just above my sides, with his face inches away from mine. "Hey babe," he spoke softly, "I heard you talking about high school. Honestly, I used to watch you all the time play basketball." I felt his grab my hands and pull them away from my face, "I liked you then, I love you now."

I became shocked, I didn't think Josh would even glance at me back then. "Whoa!" I squeaked out as he fell backward he pulled me on top of him, grabbing my hips again, "This is how it should be." I tilted my head, "Yeah?" Josh smiled and tugged on my shirt, "You, I and Celia." I felt embarrassed again, quickly turning my head, "Tyler, stop being cute, it makes me want to cuddle you."

 

I took a chance, I kissed Josh stuck my tongue in his mouth, he kissed back without hesitation. "If you guys are going to hook up on the couch, could you be quiet and clean afterward." I raised my head and looked at her, so did Josh, "W-We weren't going to-" Abigail laughed, "Really? 'Cause it looked like you guys were getting pretty hot on the couch."

Josh nervously laughed, he made me get off him, "Sorry sis, I'll try to keep my hands off him." He gave me a sexy smile and winked. I awkwardly smiled up at Abigail, "Now, leave, go do something with each other." I looked at Josh, he quickly got up and grabbed my hand, "What are we doing?" I stumble from Josh pulling me out the door, "I have somewhere special to take you, it's not a party I promise." He let go of my hand and took me down a small path, it seemed familiar, I couldn't remember it entirely, though. I looked at the overgrown bushes and trees, "This place looks old." He looked at my hand for a second before grabbing it, "It's just a little further up."

I felt so different, I haven't been alone with Josh like this or had much flirting since we adopted Celia, my heart beated fast, I couldn't help but shake every time he flashed a bright smile. "You look nervous." I looked into Josh's eyes for a moment, I turned my head looking at the trees, "Y-yeah," I mumbled, "What if an animal attacks us, or a person?" I said, covering up the fact I felt weird. "Animal attacks in California? Unless an animal escaped the zoo I think we're fine, and..." I jolted, Josh grabbed me, holding me bridal style he spun me around, "I'll protect you from anyone." I laughed, he's always so cheerful and full of himself, "I love you."

Josh stopped and looked down at me, like he wasn't expecting that, "I love you too angel. Hey, we're here!" I turned my head and saw the one place I never came back to, "Oh my god, Josh," I got myself out of his arms and ran up to an abandoned school, "this is where we first met." Josh came up behind me, "Actually, up there," he pointed to the school's rooftop, "is where we met, let's go." I gave him a crazy look, surely the school is locked down, even if it is abandon. "Hey!" I yelled, he grabbed my hand, opened the door and bolted down the halls, up the stairs, along with pulling me. The moment he opened the last door, my jaw dropped.

"It's so pretty. Is that a layout?"

I glanced at the blankets, pillows, junk food and bottles, "This is what we're doing tonight." I looked at Josh again, "You did this? For me?" I watched him nod his head and walk over to lay down on the blankets and pillows, "Come on, you'll miss out on the stars." I walked over and laid down next to him, "Odd, it's only 8:43, stars usually come out when it's really dark out." Josh chuckled, "The brightest star out here is you." I burst into laughter, it was so cheesy, "You say such dumb things, I love it." I cuddled myself up to him and his goofy smile, "I can't help it, sweetheart." I glanced up, seeing Josh smiling, his eyes beamed with joy while looking at stars, made me feel warm inside.

"How did our relationship happen?" I questioned. "Well, I actually had a crush on you since middle school, I about died when I heard you were also going to high school with me, we became friends on accident then somehow... You had a crush on me too." Tyler smiled happily, "Liked you a while after living with you." I hugged him tightly, he kissed my cheek, "I don't care if you liked me then, I'm just glad you like me now." I rolled myself over on top of him, "I don't like you, I love you." I kissed his neck softly, "Tyler, were outside." I sat up and heard shifting behind me, something dripped down my neck, "Josh? What did you just put on me?!" I touched my neck and looked at my fingers. "It's just chocolate syrup, I thought it would taste good."

I licked my fingers, "It does. You could of just put some on my hand or something." He got behind me and tilted my neck to the side, "It wasn't for you." I shivered, Josh licked all of it off my neck with the tip of his tongue, I whimpered after his pulled away and got back beside me, "I was enjoying that," I huffed out. Josh laughed, "I can tell, you're all red." I hid my face in my palms, "Don't look!" Josh pulled my hands away and kissed me, he kept softly kissing until he slipped his tongue in my mouth, I squealed and scooted back, covering my mouth. "Look at you, all red and vulnerable, so innocent, tempting."

He drew closer, laying his hand on my thigh, he pulled my hand away from my mouth and kissed my knuckles, "You've made me the happiest I've ever been in my life, I don't think I would rather spend my days with anyone but you babe, I couldn't be more proud to show you off to other people 'cause I know they can't have you." I smiled and grabbed his hand, "We should get drunk." Josh quickly became shocked, "Right now? You don't drink too often." I stood up and pulled him up too, "Josh, I've never been drunk with anyone else before, I wanna do it with you. I love you." Josh grinned and that was it.

We took off to the nearest bar and started drinking until our words slurred and everything looked different. We're sitting in a booth together, continuously drinking and having chugging contests. I watched Josh take another drink and found Josh pretty sexy, I have no idea why I thought he looked good so suddenly. He flashed a smile and laughed, his laughing stopped after I got myself on his lap and kissed him roughly, I pulled away and grinned, "Let's go down to a beach."

We took off drunk and distortedly, down the streets. We hid in a small cave together and I don't remember what exactly happened after that, but I sort of regret it now.

I woke up before Josh and it was possibly 3 or 4 in the morning. My head pounded a little, I reached into my pocket for my phone, except I didn't have my pocket nor phone, actually, I don't even have pants. My eyes shot open and I looked down, I was naked with a small blanket beneath me and Josh who also didn't have clothes on. I looked to my side and noticed our clothes were in a pile beside us, "Oh my god! Josh get up!" Josh groaned and opened his eyes, "Are we at the beach? Am I naked?" I got up and quickly put my boxers on, "I think we had sex on the beach." I raised an eyebrow, "How would you know? Ugh, who cares? We could have been caught!" Josh pointed at a condom wrapper laying in the blankets, "But we weren't caught."

After getting our clothes on I felt much more relieved and I looked at Josh,

"We had sex on the beach." 

We burst into laughter and tears, "We did, we fucked on a beach after getting drunk." I laughed harder, he grabbed my hand and we ended up running down the street holding hands, "That was just like being a teenager again." I smiled and tackled him into the grass laughing, "We snuck out from Celia, snuck into an abandoned school, got drunk and then had sex on a beach, Josh, that was sick! I'm starting to get hung over, though." Josh play fought me on the grass and then we went home.

"Where have you been?!" Abigail whisper yelled at us, "Celia's asleep, I said go out for like and few hours, you were gone all night!" Josh looked at me and I looked back, he gave me a 'who cares' look and pushed Abigail to the side, leading me to bed. "Seriously?!" Josh and I got in bed and cuddled, "We haven't done anything like that in a while. Thanks, Josh."

"I love you too Tyler."


	28. A/N: Yeah I'm still alive

Holy. Fuck.  
My email is crammed with people asking when the next chapter is coming out, jfc.  
I might start updating again in a few days. I'm sorry I've been busy with school, my art classes and a bunch of random things decided to happen. I'll be updating again soon and probably make it a long chapter as a gift for being gone forever.


	29. Officially strictly business

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler meets up with Brendon then Jenna and Debby and then finally Josh. This is basically entirely smutted through the whole long chapter I'm sorry
> 
> Can I just make a part where Tyler is down for sex a lot? Too late :P

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No serious this is long. Now I'm back to updates! I'm sorry there's so much sin right here....

I remember watching TV with Josh and finally woke up. I must've fallen asleep before him, seeing as I was out of place. I was on my side with my head carefully placed on his lap, along with his hand on my shoulder and his elbow set on the couch's arm was supporting his hand to keep his head up. I turned my head to look up at Josh and a small smile played across his face while his eyes were still closed.

 _'Must be having a good dream.'_ I absolutely love his sleeping face, his hair was messed up more than usual and his face was pure and innocent when he dreams I wonder what he dreams about. I sat up and shifted myself to sit on his lap, "Josh...? Are you awake?" I whispered. Josh's eyebrows twitched as if he was in pain. I poked his cheek, causing his head to move away.

An idea flew across my mind and I had to do it. I diligently kissed my boyfriend's neck and left a small mark. I heard a grunt and Josh's head moved to the other side. His conscious was probably telling him to wake up, but he still remained asleep. I chuckled quietly and proceeded to kiss his neck. finally, I heard him softly moan and his eyes opened, "Mh... Tyler?"

"Mornin' Josh."

I instantly noticed how Josh's face had a slight tint of red. "That felt nice," Josh said quietly. "I thought that was just the dream version of you doing that." I smiled for a moment before grinding myself down on Josh, forcing friction down onto his skinny jeans. Josh grunted and tilted his head back, "Can't you wait until I've had coffee first?"

"No."

Josh rolled his eyes, "Do you want a blowjob or what...?" I could tell Josh was still tired and was probably annoyed with me for waking him up in the first place. "You got it wrong. I want it the other way around." I licked my lips and noticed how fast I gained Josh's attention, "Oh? What makes you think you deserve even that?"

I pressed my lips roughly against his and clutched shirt tightly. Josh kissed me back and snaked his arms around my waist. "Josh, please? I want to." Josh grinned, "You're begging me to let you blow me? You really are a slut for me, babe." I pouted, realizing Josh wasn't just going to let me do what I want. "I really want to please you this morning, Josh," I muttered. "You can punish me if I don't do it good enough." I shifted again, purposely grinding down before standing up. Josh bit his lip and stared into my eyes, "More slutty than even Brendon. Sadly, I love it."

I swallowed and felt a little jumpy. Josh remained calm, his eyes bored into mine. Josh grabbed both my hands and pulled me forward to where I fell back on his lap, my head fell perfectly between his neck and shoulder while my hands stayed connected to his. "I never understand you. You want something at certain times but then you don't want it later or reverse." Josh chuckled at my words, "Sometimes I just want to sit down with you, without sex and stuff. I just like being around you."

I rolled my eyes and broke the contact with Josh. "Maybe that's not good enough for me. Josh, I like physical contact with you, like... right now." I sat on my knees in front of Josh and licked my lips again. Josh smiled, he stood up and looked down at me, "I need to go to work. Wait for me." He then patted my head and left. I sighed, "How long am I supposed to wait?!"

I sighed. I Hate mornings, Josh is either already gone, or leaves when I wake up in the morning, to work. I got up and did my usual routine, brush teeth, shower, get dressed, fix hair and eat. Except things didn't go as plan, the last thing I do is buy Star Bucks every morning, I had an unexpecting visit from Brendon who went with me this time. We sat down at a Star Bucks booth together and everything around me gave off a vibe I never experienced, strangely, every guy somewhat turned me on just a little, but why? I'm with Josh.

You look a little frustrated, did Josh say something again?" I averted my eyes from the other guys in the area, "I'm not frustrated, Josh isn't even home to say anything." Brendon chuckled, "I mean you're **frustrated** did Josh text you something that got you like this?" My eyes stared down at the table, "N-no... How could you tell?" I whispered back. Brendon smiled deviously, "You're face is turning red, you're legs are pressed together pretty damn tightly, and you're practically staring down every guy in here like a lion on the hunt, you're fucking horny."

I put my finger to my lips and made an 'shh' sound, "Shut up, I don't want people to know, God." I watched my friend's face light up instantly, "To the car!" He forced me to go into his car and rolled up his windows, "Okay, so what's the deal? Is the red head not satisfying you enough, or you just watched too much porn before coming here?" I furrowed my eyebrows over his exaggeration, "I don't know, why is it so damn hot in here, I'm going to die from sweating." Brendon grinned, wiggling his eyebrows, he spoke softly, "Oh, I bet it is _hot_ in here for you."

"Stay innocent." Brendon said loudly, "Ya fucking sinner... Anyway, nice boner! I didn't know you were that big." My eyes nearly popped out of my skull, I threw my jacket over my pants, "What the hell?! Why are you looking?! Oh my god!" My face flushed pure red. "What? It's a good dick, I can't help it if you have a nice dick, okay?! But still high five for having a nice one!" He raised his hand and I slapped it away, "Dude! No! can we stop talking about this?!"

He looked at me with his eyebrow raised, "About your dick? Or sex with Josh?" I was ready to die, Lord can't even save me now, "Stop, just stop, the only dick in this car is you right now." Brendon laughed and kept his eyes on the road, "I mean a perfectly good dick is a rarity, I mean I got one, but damn, I never expected you to have one, you're more innocent and shit." I pulled on the car handle which was locked, "I want out of this car!"

Brendon laughed and nudged my shoulder, "First you get out of my apartment, then the closet, now the car? Damn. Pretty soon you'll be a sinner at it's finest, Mademoiselle." I rolled my eyes and read a new message off my phone. "Ooh shit, did the babe leave you a message? Does he want the old 1, 2, 1, 2?" I blushed and looked at Brendon, "No, he rejected the offer I gave him this morning.... Hey, TJ, see me during lunch break, winky face."

"He wants it."

"What? No! Josh probably wants me to bring him lunch again."

"Does his lunch include a large glass of water? The bitch is as thirsty as Lindsay Lohan and every guy in the world."

"Brendon!"

Brendon turned his head, he messed with his hair for a moment before turning his attention to me again. "Look, no man ever ends a text with a winky face, UNLESS, shit is going down, or it's their crush, a joke and whatever." I glared at Brendon as he drove past my apartment. "Tell ya what, I'll drop you off at the hotel."

"How did you know where Josh works?"

Brendon suddenly honked the horn causing me to jump in my seat, Brendon is literally the most unpredictable person in the world. "Bitch, I know where he works cause I've driven him there before."

Brendon let the car drive be silent, besides blasting music to the point my ear nearly bled, it was silent.

As soon as we got there he basically kicked me out of the car and threw my drink, thankfully I got it and sped off beyond the speed limit. My ears followed the sound of tires screeching and I saw a particular finger out the window of Brendon's car in the distance. I sighed, "You think you know a person."

  
I walked inside the much larger hotel than I expected. Actually, I've never even been here before and holy shit had I wished I did come here. Josh had told me it wasn't a big deal where he worked, as long as he had money to drown me in Star bucks and anything I wanted we're good. _'Since when the hell does Josh work in fancy areas? This explains way too much.'_

People came rushing in and out, workers were dressed in a black and white color scheme, the hotel looked like a Ruby compared to the places I slept. "Excuse me sir, room for how many?" A woman asked. She was strikingly gorgeous, her beautiful blue eyes, smooth blonde hair, the way her uniform gripped her body just enough to know she was fit, but her goddamn smile could kill a man.

My mouth dropped at the sight of her. "Sir?" She asked again. "Could you please not stare, it's disrespectful." I shook my head, _'I have Josh, I love Josh. Josh is mine, I'm his. YOU DO NOT WANT THIS GIRL, DO NOT DO THIS TYLER.'_ My brain screamed. "I-I'm here to see uh, Josh... Josh Dun." She raised her eyebrow at me and looked me up and down, "You're friends with Josh Dun? Huh, guess he really has hit the low end. Follow me. 

"What's that supposed to mean?! I'm his boyfriend!" I asked, following her up the hotel stairs. She suddenly stopped, checked me out again and rolled her eyes. "Shocking," she said sarcastically, along with a surprised hand gesture. I felt my heart race, she's the type of girl I chased after in high school, before Josh. "I take that you're gay. It looks suitable for you."

I bit my lip in annoyance, "Bisexual, to be exact." She scoffed, "I didn't say it as a question, it was as statement." I felt my eyebrow twitch, "Just who do you think you are, girl?!" The woman stopped in front of a door, it read Staff Only. "A lady who works here and finds you, let just say, Different. By the way, Tyler, my name is Jenna," she said in an extremely unamused tone of voice.

"How did you know my name?"

"Josh talks about you sometimes, and who do you think YOU are?" She retaliated the question. I glared at her and watched her face turn smug as soon as I answered, "Josh's personal and only _Kitten_." Another girl walked out of the staff break room, where Josh was waiting for me. "Hey Debby, meet Josh's new _kitty_." I didn't like the way she phrased that at all. I looked to my side, facing another beautiful girl and knew who she was. "Tyler? Wait, Josh likes girls? Hold on, why is Tyler even here?"

I remembered Debby and Josh dating in high school, they were happy and was barely ever separate... Then Josh became my best friend and Debby began to dislike me. "I swear Jenna, Josh... I've never seen him look so different before, he's kinda sexy." I balled up my fist and clenched my teeth. "I'm his boyfriend." I hissed out.

Her face turned pale, her eyes were widened in disbelief. She was about to say something before the door opened up. "Hey, babe! I'm so glad to see you." I felt a pair of arms reach around my waist and soft lips press against my neck. I blushed and let out a small laugh, "Hey, I missed you too." Josh nuzzled his face into my neck which was mostly known for Josh's way of showing affection and making me laugh uncontrollably. "Josh," I giggled out. "Stop it, we're not home." Josh turned me around and gave me a sweet kiss on the cheek before he walked me into the break room he gave Debby and Jenna a look of some sort.

As soon as he shut the door I smiled. "Joshie!" I squealed while hugging him. "Joshie? I like it," he said. The first thing I noticed was his hair, pink fluff. "You dyed it pink? It looks like cotton candy." Josh smiled, nobody else was in the room. I watched him take my coffee out from my hand, "Mind?"

I also noticed his hair was slicked back and he had his work clothed on still, of course, leaving him a million times hotter. Then again... He looks so damn cute in his sleep.

I shook my head and let him take a drink. He set it on the table and wiped his mouth, his eyes stopped on the cut sleeved shirt I had on. "Damn, you know how much I like it when you wear my shirts... You just look so good in them. Though you never wear them often outside." Josh had his own 'Thing' for me wearing his clothes his shirts were slightly over-sized for me and he just liked it that way. I laughed and looked at the shirt, "Yeah I know, I was just gonna go to Star Bucks in it and stay home with it on like usual, but Brendon went with me and then by the time he left I was here."

"Usual?"

I blushed, I shouldn't of let my mouth run without thinking. "I wear your clothes when you're gone, okay? They make me feel safe, not alone and they have your scent on them." I know Josh is my boyfriend and everything but that makes everything twice as embarrassing. Josh grabbed my hand and kissed it like a prince would do to his princess, "That's so cute. I just want to cuddle you." I smiled mischievously, "We could do much more than cuddling." Josh kissed me before he lifted me up onto the counter next to the microwave, "On the break room counter? Josh, you kinky bitch." Josh chuckled and kissed me roughly, dragging his tongue across my bottom lip, which I happily gave him an entrance.

Josh fought against my tongue until I felt his hand unexpectedly touch the front of my jeans, making me jerk back. Josh smiled as if he found my fidgety personality cute. "Nervous already? And we're not even at the good part yet." Josh smirked and quickly unbuttoned my jeans, a small moan escaped my lips, Josh's had brushed against my crotch.

"Shhh, someone will hear you," Josh whispered into my ear. He kissed my neck and had his fingers latched into my jeans, tugging them down little by little. I bit my lip harshly, forcing back moans. I took off his black servant vest and started unbuttoning his shirt beneath. Suddenly, Josh and I's attention turned to the door.

"Well damn, couldn't save yourself for later?"

The blonde lady from earlier stood in the door frame smirking. I could only imagine how this looked... Josh had my pants around my thighs, revealing the tent in my boxers, a fresh hickey on my neck, on the counter and Josh's shirt halfway unbuttoned. This looked bad because it looked exactly how it seemed.

Josh looked at me with terror in his eyes, sadly, it was cute. Jenna raised her hands up and walked to the fridge, grabbing a bottle of water. "Don't let me ruin your fun, clean up afterward." She strutted to the door, giving me a whimsical look. "Have fun and be safe, Tyler."

The door shut, leaving me with Josh. "This was such a bad idea-- Fuck, I shouldn't have asked you to come here. I'm so sorry, Tyler." The regret rolled off the tip of his tongue, how sincere... But that's not what I wanted. I crashed my lips against Josh's again, catching him by surprise. Josh seemed to instantly become focused on me rather than his apologizing.

He eagerly pulled down my pants, tugging them down from my thighs and then having them thrown aside. I felt his hands grip my hips securely, him doing this many times before I knew what he wanted. I wrapped my legs around his waist, without breaking our kiss Josh carried me to the door, locking it and pressing my back against it.

Josh broke the kiss and lightly bit my collar bone. "Oh my god, Josh!" I groaned out. Josh grinded himself against my lower half. "Stay quiet, or I'll stop." I did my best to keep quiet, I managed to stay quiet pretty well for awhile, until Josh's left hand grabbed my throat, while his other hand slipped between our bodies. Josh's hand slid into my boxers, I gasped and moaned far too loud than I was allowed.

  
I yelped at the sudden pressure on my shoulders, he had pushed me down on my knees. "If you won't be quiet I'll make you shut up." At this point I knew what was being asked for, well, not exactly asked, somewhat forced. As sad as it was, I licked my lips and eagerly went straight for his pants zipper. Josh growled, smacking my hands away, "You little slut, you haven't finished everything yet."

I pouted, "I'm sorry, I'll be good." I removed my shirt and began unbuttoning his shirt again, I looked in his eyes for a moment and felt those perfect lips touch mine again. I got back down on my knees and unbutton the last remaining button before patiently looking up at him. Josh threw his own shirt into the pile of clothing and smiled down at me, "Go ahead."

Another interruption later. A guy came to the door, "Joshua? Deborah? the break is over." Josh let out an exasperated sigh, "Can I please just fuck my boyfriend one time at work!" He walked over to the pile, grabbing his button up and vest, then walking over to the door.

I growled and ran towards him. Josh turned around and was greeted by me jumping onto him and wrapping my legs around his waist again, forcing him to fall back against the door. "Come on Josh, I really can't wait for you any longer. Skip work for a bit, stay here and have some fun and touch me." Josh dropped his shirt and kissed me softly, "Ty, I need to go." He pouted.

I roughly kissed him, this time with more passion. Josh gently bit my lip and growled, "You fucking slut, I'll stay to teach you a lesson." I felt cold, solid surface beneath me. He wasted no time at all, I was pinned in the corner of the wall with Josh's body against mine while his kisses are going lower with every little love bite he left. His lips touched an inch above my navel and my reaction was to shut up legs.

Josh smirked, grabbing my legs and forcing them apart. I looked at him, my mouth was covered by the backside of my hand and I felt so helpless but excited at the same time. "Don't be shy," Josh chuckled, kissing the inner of my thigh, snaking his hand to play with the rim of my boxers.

"You look so fucking hot like this, I should stay home and tease you more often." I bit the inside of my cheek, watching Josh leave wet kisses on my inner thigh, licking up it with the tip of his tongue. I blushed when I realized he was taking my boxers off, slowly. "Tell me the rules, Angel," Josh whispered lowly.

I whimpered, Josh had stopped pulling my boxers down as soon as my hip bones were visible. "N-No loud noises... Do everything you say-" Josh smirked and cut me off. "And why do you do everything I say?" He asked proudly. "Cause' you're in charge and I want to." I caught Josh in the moment, lunging forward, Josh was now on his back and I was on my knees. "Third rule; please the master first." Josh prompted himself up with his arms and smiled, "Master? You really are full of surprises."

I giggled, unbuttoning his pants, quickly taking them off and finding myself nearly drooling for the massive tent built up in is boxers. "Fuck," I mumbled to myself. Josh must've heard me, he looked pretty content with everything, though he did still carry his sweet smile while watching me. I pulled down his boxers and blushed a deep crimson red. I leaned down, licking from the base to the tip, lapping my tongue over the tip and then sucking gently on the tip. I looked up at Josh through my eyelashes; Josh had his hand in the small fluffed up tuft of hair in the front of my head, he was biting his lip hard enough to possibly draw blood, the small moan he let out only encouraged me to try different things.

I decided to try licking the underside of his cock, another small moan rung in my ears. I gasped, my eyes flickered down to my boxers and then back to Josh who had a playful smile. Josh's knee rubbed continuously against my hard on, my moans and Josh's giggle fell into a mix together. "Tyler, you gotta keep going or I'll stop," Josh purred. I felt him push a bit harder, giving off more friction, I bit back a moan and started sucking his cock. This lasted quite a while until Josh found out the perfect speed and just enough friction. My eyes squeezed shut and instead of a moan a slightly high pitched 'Mhmm' sound came out, Josh moaned questionably loud from me moaning against him.

I stopped and pushed his knee down, "Huh? Tyler?" Josh asked. I took off my own boxers and climbed on top of him, without warning nor telling Josh, I lowered myself on top of him. "Holy fuck!" Josh yelled in surprise. I rolled my hips for a moment, Josh moaned and grabbed my hips instinctively. I tried slow bounces up and down, Josh bucked his hips up, causing simultaneous moans from both of us. I gradually sped up, having him buck his hips along with mine finding a rhythm together.

I felt euphoria, Josh hit that spot. I paused, covering my mouth from what could have been a loud moan, one that should only be allowed inside our house. Josh noticed the long pause and smirked, "So that's the angle you like it hm?." I snapped out of my daze, realizing Josh suddenly sat up and forcefully rammed my lower half back down. "Josh!" I squeaked out. I dug my short nails into his shoulder blades, my face buried into his neck. Josh kept ramming me back down on him and fuck did it feel good. I gasped, Josh drew his body closer to mine, just so it would grind against my cock at the same time.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, Josh! I can't-- too much!" I let out another shaky moan, Josh's cock twitched inside me, signaling he was getting close too. "Shut up, you like it you slut." I started bouncing along with his rhythm again, Josh's nails dug deeper into my hips. My back hit the cold flooring, Josh had pushed me backward, keeping a hold of on hip and using his other hand to rub my cock. I still had my nails on his back and my face buried deep in his neck, along with the moans passing between us both.

I felt him twitch again and shots of warmth throughout my inside and not a moment too soon he pulled out and I squirmed at the new feeling of Josh's tongue pressed up against my cock, licking and sucking on it. I lost it after a couple deep throats I moaned and released, having Josh lick off any cum left from my cock and then being greeted by his sweet smile.

"You are way too good at sucking dick to still be an amateur," Josh told me. "Can't say I don't love it, though." He kissed my forehead. "Sometimes I like experimenting." I like the after sex, Josh, he gets really sweet and adorable. Josh helped me up off the ground and put his clothes on, I was going to do the same but he insisted I'd let him do it. Josh asked me questions about if I was comfortable with everything that happened, if I needed anything or if I was in any pain. I giggled and watched him struggle with the last button on his vest. "Here," I calmly said. I pulled his hands away and fixed the button with ease, "You're so dumb sometimes."

"Yeah well, that's why I have you around."

Josh pecked my lips and smiled at me, "I know you don't have a ride home, I get off in about an hour or so. You can stay around here with me, the manager won't mind if you don't do anything wrong." I nodded my head, honestly, I was tired, Josh wore me out. Josh made me stand outside the staff room while he talked to his manager, I could hear them through the door.

"Oh, I didn't come when you told us break was over 'cause Tyler had a bad headache when he got here, I had to help him."

"Hmm... I'll let it go this one time Joshua, I expect you to be there when I ask. As for the guy, he can stay around, but any damage or bad behavior is on your part, Joshua."

"I understand."

I watched the door open and Josh blankly looks at me, "You heard all of that didn't you?" I nodded my head and smile cheesily, "Well, guess I have to obey you even out of the bedroom now huh?" I trailed my hand up his chest, I heard the door begin to open so I quickly backed away, acting like I was doing nothing while Josh, on the other hand, looked flustered. His boss stopped and looked at him perplexed by his reddened face and then he looked at me, I shrugged and watched his boss walk away.

I jolted, Josh pinned me up against the wall, roughly kissing me for a moment. "Don't you dare start anything while you're here, I want you to be a slut in private only." I raised my eyebrow and jumped up on him again, he pushed me harder against the wall to keep me lifted up. "Make me," I spat back. Josh started kissing me again, "Dammit, we cannot have an entire sex day today. Just be good while you're here? I'll fuck you again back home." I whimpered as he dropped me back onto my feet, "Now, I need to check the files in the staff room for Debby, you can come."

"Is there camera's in there?"

"Not yet, and we're not having sex in there too, we just finished."

"I know you got more rounds than that Josh."

"I said no!"

I grunted, following Josh inside from where his boss came out from. Josh sat down in the chair and opened up the laptop, "You need to sit down and be good, okay?" I raised my eyebrow again and sat on the carpet next to Josh, he didn't seem to care. I smirked and got an idea, "Hey Josh when we get home what are you gonna do to me? Will it be as good as the fucking from like 10 minutes ago?" Josh didn't answer, I knew he listened because his face was pure red. "God, I love it when you're rough with me, it's better when you touch me and kiss my neck and then forcing me to obey you. It'd be great to get fucked by you on the desk right now."

"Shut the fuck up you little slut."

I waited a couple minutes before sneaking myself under the desk, I already noticed Josh was getting hard again from the images I gave him. I palmed him through his pants and heard a sharp inhale, "Fucking, Tyler you're disobeying me, stop." Josh sounded pretty serious, but I was focused on something much better. I unbuttoned his pants and unzipped his fly. "Tyler Robert Joseph!" Josh said sternly. On regular days I would stop everything and listen to him but just now today. I pulled out his now fully hard cock and rubbed it, Josh's serious face turned into a pleased one, the typing sounds from the laptop keyboard stopped, "Tyler..." Josh moaned softly. I paid special attention to the underside of his cock with my tongue, Josh favorite spot.

"Mhh, I fucking love having you around," he panted out. I smiled and tried my best at deep throats mixed with licks, sucking on the tip and pumping the base, just how Josh liked it. Josh's hand balled my tuft of hair and pushed my head down further, it hit the back of my throat causing me to gag a little. I heard a loud moan and salty liquid on my tongue which was easily swallowed, I didn't waste a drop.

I got out from under the desk and stood up smiling at the beet red, tired face of my lovely boyfriend. "You are in so much trouble," Josh replied while fixing his pants. I sat down on the desk, "And so are you for asking me to come here." Josh glared at me, "What do you mean?" He growled. I smiled and winked at him. My eyebrows raised, Josh grabbed me up from the desk by my hips and sat me on his lap. "Kitten, you need to stop or I'll ground you."

I rolled my eyes and lousily tossed my arms around his neck, "You can't ground me, you're not my dad and I'm an adult." Josh raised his eyebrows and smirked, "I'm sorry, who's the one who takes care of you, makes sure you stay in place, loves you to death and is your best friend at the same time?" There was a moment of silence, where I was thinking.

"My mom?"

Josh gave me his Are you serious? face and I giggled, lightly kissing his nose, "I'm kidding, I know you do a lot for me. Thank you, Josh." I heard someone clear their throat, I turned myself around, but for some reason, Josh wouldn't let me get off his lap, he kept his arms around my waist and he hands tightly held the front of my shirt. "Are you guys done yet? Josh, you got seven room service request like, right now. I'll stay with Tyler while you and Debby finish up," Jenna said, leaning her slim figure against the door frame. "Yeah... Of course," Josh's grip was even tighter than before. I furrowed my eyebrows in concern and tried getting up, ultimately failing.

When I tried again I was stopped by Josh whispering in my ear from behind, "You be good. Stay 7 feet away from Jenna at all times, don't look at her too much and don't even poke her." He let me get up, "Isn't that over exaggerating?" I asked. Yes, I did think Jenna was beautiful but I would never do that to Josh. "Fuck no, you better listen to me Tyler Joseph, I will ground you."

Josh left, but not without giving me a much longer than usual kiss. Jenna turned to me and had a bored look in her eyes, "Josh is really possessive over you, didn't take him as a jealous type." I scoffed at her, "Josh jealous over you hanging around me? Ha, good one, you're like a 5/10." She looked at me with fire in her eyes, "Is that not good enough for you?!" I shook my head, "No, you're just not good enough for me."

The fiery glare she gave me died out into a smile, "At least I have something to offer." I sat down in the staff's chair and watched her sit down on the desk in front of me. "I bet you offer it to everyone, do I get a special discount? I'll give it to Brendon, he likes one night stands." Her mouth dropped, but she simply smiled again, "Wow, I might have underestimated you. You really know how to run your mouth huh?" I stayed quiet and leaned back in the chair, "I do, but I mostly do it to make Josh-" I stopped myself from finishing that sentence, 'I do it to make Josh turned on...'

Jenna stared at me, she leaned forward as a way to show she wanted to know the rest of what I was saying. "To make Josh?" She asked while rotating her hand. "Umm, uh... to make Josh annoyed! It's really cute when he's annoyed with me," I saved myself. "I wouldn't know, Josh is a little reserved with his personal life revolving around you."

Finally, Josh came barging in panting like a dog, "Tyler!" I turned my head to look at my boyfriend who looks like he ran a marathon. "Fuck, let's go-- home." I nodded my head and right when I stood up Jenna grabbed the back of my shirt. "Um... Tyler, here's my number. Text me some time and learn to keep your mouth shut." I noticed Josh's face turned into not exactly hate but more of dislike almost instantly when I exchanged numbers with the girl I had just met maybe a few hours ago.

"Will meet up for coffee or lunch sometime, yeah?"

I smiled, "Are you asking me on a date? Josh is right there!" I laughed it off and shook my head. Jenna's eyes widened and she pushed me over to Josh, "No, I'm asking you to hang out with me, I wanna get to know you since your my best guy friend's boyfriend."

I waved her goodbye and was pulled out the door, "What the hell do you think you're doing Tyler?!" I honestly didn't know what I just did, I just know Josh didn't like it. "Uhh... making new friends?" Josh rolled his eyes at my somewhat answer and practically dragged me to the car.

I liked the quiet moments which was very quickly broken by Josh getting into the driver's side, slamming the door shut from the inside. "What did I say?! Stay away from Jenna, she is--" I quickly interrupted, "Making you jealous, Jenna is making you jealous." Josh paused at my words, he audibly exhaled, messing up his slicked back hair into his regular messy mohawk. "I'm not jealous, why would I need to be jealous when you're probably thinking about fucking her."

I looked down in silence.

Josh shot his head my direction, baffled, shocked, maybe confused. "You actually thought about that?! Unbelievable!" I hated myself so much for even thinking she was beautiful because I love Josh... I think. Josh visibly looked hurt, that killed my insides. "I'm sorry... It was just a thought, I wasn't going to actually do anything with her," tears pricked my eyes. Josh's face lightened up for a moment, quickly fading into concern.

"I wouldn't do that to you Josh, you don't deserve to be cheated on you're too sweet and amazing, you do everything for me, even go so far as to spend half your wallet just to spoil me and I barely do anything for you. Oh my god, I'm such a terrible person! What's the point of living when I can't even make the one person I care about the happiest."

I actually blanked out, saying all my inner thoughts out loud in one sitting. I heard shifting, Josh had crawled into the back seat. "Tyler, come back here with me." I didn't want to, I couldn't bring myself to even look at him. "Tyler, please...?" wiped my eyes and felt my stomach drop as I crawled in the back with Josh.

I moped in the seat until an arm came around my waist and pulled me closer, so close my ear was gently pressed against the sound of a slow beating heart. Josh didn't say a word, he let me cry into his chest, laying his head on top of mine and rubbing my back. Josh may get mad but he changes on the spot any time I start to feel overwhelmed or upset.

"I even took you away from Debby, you were so happy with her and I dragged you to hell with me!"

Josh chuckled, "Actually, I liked you better than her for a really long time. I shouldn't have gotten mad at you for something you can't help, I'm afraid she'll take you from me."

"I wanna go home...."

"I'll take you home, give you a bath, make dinner, will cuddle up on the couch with a blanket together and do anything you want, Kitten."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MY HEART WILL GO ONNNNN!!!


	30. Josh's change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fuck it I'm throwing semi-bdsm in here and throwing a new addition to the fam.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ALL YOU SINNERS STAND UP SING HALLELUJAH

After the little incident in the car Josh drove us home. Josh held the door open for me, I walked through and felt his lips press against the back of my neck. "I'm gonna go change into something comfortable, wait ****for me in the bathroom." I did exactly as he said, putting his bag away for him before going to the bathroom. Josh entered the room a few minutes later, he wore bush cat shirt along with his sweat pants he kept in the bottom drawer.

 

Josh wrapped his arms arms around my waist, swaying us from side to side. "What's with you? You're pretty happy," I sighed out. Josh stopped and looked concern all of a sudden, "Of course I'm happy, I get to wash you. You don't look really happy like me though." I was happy, I love the special nights Josh gives me a bath, cooks dinner and does cute little things all night for me. "No, I am, It's just... my head hurts and my body is a bit sore from early."

 

Josh nodded his head and smiles, "I'll be gentle with you, babe." He started the faucet, "After dinner I'll give you a back massage, then I'll put you to bed and will go on a date tomorrow morning." I curled my lips into a smile, "A date? Besides our couch watching movies? Were finally giving up on being lazy and considering cuddled on the couch isn't a date? Wow." Josh shook his head giggling.

 

"I thought it would be nice to take you out tomorrow with maybe Dallon and Brendon; to Disney Land. I like showing off the beautiful husband I have." My face burned with fire in my cheeks, giving that toothy smile towards the ground whenever Josh makes me blush. I shifted my eyes to look through my lashes towards the man knelt down at the side of the tub, watching me with a sweet smile, "Did you like that? Me calling you my husband? Come over here."

 

Oo I slowly walked to the side of Josh and kneeled next to him, "Its just... I really, really like you more than I should... It feels like a huge sin towards God...." Deep down I did have thoughts of maybe it was sinful to date and accidentally fall in love with another man. But he perfectly engraved himself under my skin like an itch that doesn't go away. He was poisoned. How am I supposed to stop myself, my craving to feel his hand touch mine?

 

I hated how our relationship could be sinful, but it feels so good and right....

 

"I really, really like you too," Josh said softly, turning his head to be only inches away from my red face. "Maybe it's a sin, but I don't think it is in my heart. I just want you to be happy with me." His eyes glanced at my lips for a second before pressing a light kiss there. "But I am happy, right now with you," I whispered back. He kissed me again, this time he had his hand on my cheek.

 

Josh bit my lip, sucking on it and nibbling lightly. He then suddenly broke apart our moment by urging me to get ready for the bath. I licked my lips, having the lingering taste of a new kind if poison, there was once red poison, but now it's a sweet pink poison satisfying me. Josh let my lip go and our foreheads pressed against each other. "Damn, you're so beautiful." My heart stammered, another blush crept its was to my cheeks. Josh smiled, that smile was the cutest thing in the world.

 

Josh eventually pulled away from me, turning off the water and turning around, allowing me to undress and hop in the tub. A sigh of relief escaped my lips as the warm water touches my skin, "Hey, you got the right temperature this time." I relaxed, closing my eyes and leaning my head against the wall. "Baby, don't fall asleep on me yet." I giggled at the disappointment in his voice. 

 

I listened to the cabinet open and close, Josh is shuffling around the small room and placing things on the tub's rim. A soft cloth gently glided across my shoulder and down my arm, then small circles against my chest until it suddenly stopped. "Hm?" I was confused, why did he stop? I slowly opened my eyes halfway. There he was, just looking at me with this loving smile. "You're staring... Josh, stop looking at me like that...." I couldn't stop blushing, to no surprise of course.

 

"I'm sorry, you just look so good right now. I just can't believe you're mine. You're just a fucking angel, you have no idea what I want to do to you." I looked at Josh for a lingering moment and I bit the inside of my cheek. "Josh... you're going to start something and-" my mouth closed, I stopped talking. Josh's face was serious, but hinted at some playfulness reflecting off him.

 

I didn't say another word, I just smiled. I went back to relaxing. Josh's fingers worked throughout my hair, the fragrance of pomegranate shampoo filled the room. Josh took the overly familiar cup used every time he would give me a bath. Water ran down my neck and back after Josh had poured the cup of water on my head. After the shampoo was rinsed out of my hair, I gases at Josh through my eyelashes again. 

 

"Fuck..." Josh exhaled. I unexpectedly kiss him, leaving him in shock. Josh kissed me harder as soon as he realized what was happening. We never really do romantic things at times like this, but I was fixated on him and he was more than obviously infatuated by just the small looks I would give him off and on. I pulled away and fluttered my eyes open, not really sure what reaction to get from him, but thank god it was a good one.

 

"Damn, if only I could get you to kiss me all the time." I laughed and let him continue to wash my hair and use the last bits of conditioner in my hair. "I can't wait for your hair to dry, it gets so fluffy." That was something Josh absolutely loved about baths, my hair turns fluffy and curls back. Josh flipped out the first time I moved in with him and showered, his constantly messed with the small curls every time.

 

I also remember he nearly cried when I had my hair cut short and shaved on the sides. He hated me for weeks over it. "Why are you so obsessed with my hair? I kinda wanna cut it again soon." I heard a growl and Josh glare at me like I just murdered a family of four, "I hope you know I'm stronger than you." I laughed at Josh's way of intimidating me, "Josh, you wouldn't hurt me on purpose, well, except for that one time you busted my lip...."

 

Josh instantly looked upset with himself, "I'm still getting over that...." I felt a wave of guilt overcome me, "Shit, I'm sorry Josh, I didn't mean to bring that up again. Look its fine, I get it, you were upset and stuff. I'm not mad at you though. Besides, that was like a month or two ago so it doesn't even matter." Now that I thought about it, we've been dating for nearly a year and I think Josh just thought about it too.

 

"Our anniversary is next Wednesday, our first year together. We made it this far." Josh looked excited, "Only two more years to go!" I cocked my eyebrow,"Two more years for what?" I asked cautiously. I hope he doesn't mean two years before breaking up. "Nothing bad, I just um... okay, shut up, Tyler." I chuckled hearing him try to get off the coversation. I let it slide after seeing how embarrassed he was.

 

I froze when I felt hands on my waist. "What? Did I trigger you already?" Josh questioned. I shook my head and tried to ignore the fact his hands were washing closer to my lower half, "Um, could we just skip the rest?" Josh smirked, he knew exactly why I never want him to clean anywhere below my naval. "Tyler, calm down. Its just your waist, thighs and legs, nothing big, unless... You want to make it something big," Josh chuckled.

 

I blushed wildly, "Shut up. Can we just make this quick?" Josh nodded his head and finished washing my body. Afterwards, I forced Josh to get out of the bathroom so I could get dressed and try something. I dried my body off and my hair, though it was still dripping water onto my tanned shoulders.

 

I looked over to the side where Josh left out clothes for me. I wore my sweat pants and stole one of Josh's favorite hoodies off the bathroom door handle, assuming he left it there and forgot about it from yesterday. The very last thing I did was use this bottle of perfume, yes perfume. I prefer cologne, but I left my list of things I needed from the store to dumb ass Brendon.

 

I growled, "Sexiest fantasies, roses mi amor aroma. I'm officially done with life." I glared at the bottle. There's no sense in not using it if I'm just here with Josh. I sprayed a small amount and holy fuck was it strong. I hid the bottle somewhere Josh wouldn't find it and walked into our living room. I plugged in my hair dryer and Josh walked in and stopped me. "Is that my hoodie? Fuck, you look so hot."

 

I looked down to conceal my burning red face and small smile. Josh came closer and sat on the couch, "Here, I'll help you dry your hair." He nodded towards the floor in front of the couch. I groaned and sat between his legs in front of the couch, "You always do everything for me. I feel like a wife."

 

"Metaphorically," Josh muttered, turning in the hair dryer, "you're my wife, in this relationship at least." Sadly, he was right. Josh took his time drying my hair, every now and then I would look up from my phone and see his reflection in the small mirror on the wall, he had a look of lust in his eyes. Josh finished shortly after I looked up a few times and combed my hair out.

 

"You smell different, Ty." I watched him stand up and unplug the dryer. "What do you mean?" I acted clueless, laying down on the couch while looking through my face book. As I scrolled down my feed I stopped and set my phone aside, looking at the pink haired man gazing down at me. "You should wear that scent more often."

 

I couldn't move, he was on top of me; holding me down. "Josh, you're starting something again." Josh smirked, planting a kiss on my jaw line, "Actually, you started it with that fucking sexiest fantasies perfume. I just plan on finishing it for you."

 

"You knew?! How?" I questioned, embarrassed and confused. I slipped up and moaned abruptly, his hands slid down my sides and he softly kissed my neck a few times before answering, "It's my personal favorite perfume on women, but it works better on you." I couldn't help myself, I bucked my hips upwards and heard Josh scold me, "No, you haven't eaten dinner and there's still time before bed."

 

"But I want you now. This isn't fair." Josh chuckled and kissed me before getting off the couch. I stared at Josh who was grabbing a box out of the closet. I wasn't sure what was in there, actually, I never even knew it was in there. "I got you something today. I know I'm always working in the mornings and can't be around to keep you company, so I got you a gift to make it up to you."

 

He sat the box on the carpet in front of me and sat down next to the box, "I don't really prefer it, but you'll like it." I took a glance over at him before opening the box. "A fur coat?" There was just a pile of fluff in the box. Then these big ears popped out of no where and then it blinked and I saw a tail poje straight up.

 

It got from its laying down position to it just sitting down with its head titled and tongue hanging out of its mouth. I stared at it, it stared at me. Josh put a collar on it and pat its head, "Its a boy. I got him from Dallon this morning and its just a puppy." This was a husky with some big ears, bigger than its own head. "Riley, he's Riley and he's so adorable!" I snatched him up and hugged him like a teddy bear and Riley licked Josh's cheek before running around the house.

 

"You even bought him a cute little collar. Josh you're the best!" I hugged him tightly and heard a small click sound behind me. Confused, I let go and touched me neck, "Huh?" Josh's smile was devious and kind of attractive, "I got you one too, keep it on at all times unless I take it off for you." I stared at him, unsure why I was wearing a dog collar, "Why do you do this stuff to me and why am I wearing a collar?"

 

Josh kissed me again and stood back up, "Because you look hot like that and I'm making you my bitch." I didn't know whether to fear him or laugh at that pun but I stayed quiet either way. I heard another click sound and felt myself get yanked up. "A leash?! Fuck no." I unbuckled the collar and groaned as a stinging pain raced across my thigh.

 

I looked at Josh, holding the leash in a way for it to act like a whip, "Did I say you could take it off?!" He yelled at me. I waited for him to switch into his sweet and caring self again, seeing that he actually hurt me. Nothing. Just a menacing stare, like I really was a dog who did something shameful. "Why do you always do this? It hurts!"

 

He whipped my thigh with the leash again and this time pulling me close to him and grabbing my jaw harshly to the point where I winced, "Because you fucking love it you slut, my slut. You love getting thrown around and I know it. You're already hard." I pulled away forcefully, only for him to shove me against the wall with that same menacing look in his eyes.

 

"You like it this way and I have no problem with bruising you." I swallowed hard and the moment he took a step back, I collapsed to the floor. My shaky breaths and red face seemed to get an amused look from him, only for a second m, then it turned cold and dominating again.

 

The dropped the collar to the floor and kicked it right in front on my feet. "Put it back on, I don't want to walk back in here and not see it on you." Josh proceeded to walk out of the room. I shouldn't of liked that as much as I did. I hated it, I hated the fact I lived for these moments Josh would psychically hurt me just enough that I loved it.

 

I scurried for the collar and put it back in as quickly as I could like my life depended on it. I took a deep breath and still trembled with excitement. "First he gives me a puppy then he whips me like a bitch," I muttered. "I can hear you, Tyler. I told you, you're my bitch." I calmed down after seeing Riley come back into the room and sniff around. 

 

I groaned again, my back had already hurt from all the shit we did in the staffs room and now it hurt worse. Josh walked back to me and smiled approvingly, "Good little slut, you put your collar back on. Come here." I hesitated to go near him. I stood in front of him in fear, I felt more helpless than ever compared to him.

 

His hand raised up and I squeezed my eyes shut, preparing for getting slapped. Instead, he hand laid gently on my shoulder and I was greeted by a soft passionate kiss. "Huh?" I was confused. Josh looked at me and smiled, "You didn't do anything wrong. If I put that collar on you and you obey me you get rewarded, punishment if you disobey."

 

I rolled my eyes in annoyance. Josh whispered into my ear, "I want to see you wear that in bed, it'd be so hot to have you handcuffed with that collar on." I blushed, shaking my head and pushing him away. He grabbed my hand and gently bit my finger. I retracted my hand quickly, holding it to my chest and probably looking more submissive then ever.

 

"I'm going to go make dinner. Stay in here." I nodded my head furiously and sat next to Riley, watching Josh go into the kitchen. Riley laid on my lap. I spaced out thinking about what just happened. Josh was never like this with anyone until I came around. Even Debby, he was always nice and would mostly hold her hand, but me, he's different, he genuinely seemed to like undermining me and I like it too.

 

I petted Riley's soft fur and took a deep breath.

 

What have I turned my sweet, loving, caring and cuddly boyfriend into?

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M A FUCKING SIN itself


	31. Minor change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jenna's drunk, Ashley (Halsey) likes Josh, Debby also still likes Josh, Josh hates Jenna around Tyler, Tyler hates Josh around Ashley and Debby. Josh wants to go to Brendon's party. What can go wrong?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cheesy endings kill me.

What have I turned my sweet, loving, caring and cuddly boyfriend into?

Nearly 2 hours of staying in the living room waiting for Josh and he came out with paper, "Hey, Tyler, instead of dinner how about a party?" I groaned, he knows I hate partying, "Mhh, where at and what am I supposed to get out of this?" Josh grabbed my hips and kissed my forehead, "Its at Brendon and Dallon's, I'll take the collar off while we're gone." I rolled my eyes, an obvious sign of annoyance. "Close your eyes, Babe."

"What? Why?" I asked quietly. Josh grabbed my hand and put it on my eyes. "Because I asked you to," he lowly growled into my ear. He kissed behind my ear and slowly went down to my neck, bit my collar, dragging his tongue down my stomach to my navel. I subsequently uncovered my eyes and saw him staring up at me with a smirk.

This was a different Josh from what I knew. He was on his knees in front of me, my nervous expression was the one thing feeding his ego and dominate side. His left hand had a firm grip on my hip while his right hand was hooked onto the front of my jeans, tugging them down enough to reveal just below the hem of my boxers.

My face exploded into different shades of red. He licked below my navel and then bit my hip. "I bet you'd look really good on the bed begging and moaning for me," Josh whispered.

"I'll make sure you get anything you want when we come back, if you're interested in going now."

I raced into our bedroom and put on a shirt, "I'm ready!" Josh laughed, "I'm not. You didn't have to get ready so fast." I already knew that, I don't want to admit I live for the moments Josh pays more than enough attention to me, between the sheets or out of them. Josh took a moment to get dressed, god damn did I love him wearing tight black jeans and a flannel.

"You said we were going to a party, not a teen girl's wet dream, go change." Josh must've seen the jealousy in my eyes, "I promise I'll save some for you, Ty." I exploded, "SOME?! No, I want all of it!" I saw his face turn into surprise, "You do? How selfish, but also how cute. If it makes you happy I wasn't actually planning on giving anything to someone else."

 

I unlocked the door and heard Josh mumble under his breath. "Ah!" I squeaked out, as Josh picked me up bridal style and carried me through the door, "What are you doing?! I said don't touch me you jerk!" I snared at him. Josh didn't listen to me at all, he just let me yell at him until I felt cold leather beneath my skin and warmth on top of me.

"Would you fuck off! Josh, get the fuck off me right now or I will leave you," I got serious for a moment. His lips press against my jaw and he kept his weight on me so I couldn't move, "I told you it wasn't like that, we didn't do anything she was just making it seem like it so you would break up with me. Tyler, I want to marry you still."

"Well, maybe I don't want to marry you anymore...."

Josh growled, he didn't like me words at all. He shifted so I was on his lap. I thought I could just get up based on the new position, but I noticed his nails dug into my waist the more I resisted. Resisting turned into fighting. During the fighting ended up on the floor, I screamed in agony with Josh biting down on my shoulder enough to draw blood.

I smacked him but he didn't even budge.

"I'm not going to leave you alone until you know I would never cheat on you."

I grunted and turned my head away from him, "You keep saying that but I don't believe you." I heard a small whimper out of him and I rolled my eyes. "Alright fine," Josh softly cooed. I didn't like that, it sounded too happy. He got up and walked to the door, "If you need me I'll be at Debby's and Ashley's."

An alarm went off in my head, Debby is his ex and Ashley is a whore for him. I shot up and grabbed his sleeve, "No way in hell, are you going to stay with them." I stood in front of the door blocking it, "I'm sorry I over reacted earlier, just don't go to their house. You said I can have anything I want when we got home and I want you to stay here tonight."

Josh crossed his arms across his chest, "Is that what you really want?" I shook my head furiously. "Alright... I'll go tomorrow then," he turned around and began to walk to the couch. I couldn't let him go there at all, what if Debby still likes my Joshua and tries to steal him or Ashley kidnaps him.

I ran up to him and wrapped my arms around his waist tightly, I buried my face into his back, "No! Don't go at all, please? You belong here with me." Josh sighed, "You are so selfish its unbelievable." He pulled my arms off and sat on the couch. I followed at stood right in front of him with a frown plastered on my face.

Josh grabbed my hand and pulled me on top of his lap, "I'll think about not going." I still wasn't satisfied, "Josh, please stay." I cried out, gripping his flannel and hiding in his neck. He didn't say anything, he just licked over the wound in my shoulder and softly brushed his fingers through my hair.

I stayed in that position, I liked having Josh do minor things that were sweet. "Are you tired, Babe?" Josh asked. I didn't reply, I wrapped my arms around his neck. He understood and picked me up, carrying me to our bedroom, "Want me to stay?" He whispered.

"Yes, please." Josh gently sat me on the bed and removed my shirt for me. He did the same for himself and laid beside me, "Good night, I love you, Ty." I rolled over on top of him and kissed him softly. The moment lingered; I pulled away slowly, Josh's eyes opened and his lips curled into a smile.

He laughed and leaned up to kiss my nose, "Stop being so cute all the time." I chuckled and looked at him for a second when I looked down at his chest I squealed, Josh grabbed my ass and laughed at my shock, "Shut up, I wasn't expecting you to do that.... Hey, um, I'm not really too tired... we could still go back to the party if you want." Josh shook his head, "Or I could get you out of those jeans and-"

"Josh."

"Alright, fine. Let's go back and then stop at Star Buck's on the way home."

Josh carried me the whole way on his back and it was fun, he mostly ran down the streets until the fourth block; Brendon's house. Brendon came out when he saw us and Josh let me down, "Shit, you guys took off so fast arguing over bitches. Oh and Jenna is looking for you Tyler."

Josh growled over just the name of her, obviously still doesn't approve of her spending any time with me at all. "I won't fuck Ashley if you don't fuck Jenna," he whispered to me. I rolled my eyes and pushed him to the side, "I'll shove my ukulele so far up your ass if you dare touch her."

He cocked his eyebrow and held out a drum stick, "Jenna equals drum stick." I couldn't help but laugh, it wasn't even a real threat to me. We went separate ways and I found myself staring at Jenna, she's still beautiful to me and its hard to watch other guys try talking to her... even though I have Josh.

"Hey sweetie, I was looking every where for you. Come on!" Jenna grabbed my hand and pulled me up the stairs and into an enclosed space. Jenna's breath smelled like alcohol; no doubt she was drunk. "Jenna? Are you okay?" I asked concernly.

The door shut and she started removing her clothes, "Whoa, okay, Jen, what are you doing?!" I started freaking out. I wasn't sure what I'm supposed to do, I only know I can not do this with her. She crept closer and licked her lips,"I always thought you were cute and I was hoping you'd show up tonight."

My lip quivered, she only had her underwear on and was getting closer to me. My brain scrambled into a mix of hell and shame for even looking at her. Bolted for the door and found it locked. "GODDAMMIT," I yelled and heard a voice in the next room refusing something. "Am I not good enough for you, Tyler?" She asked, grabbing my hand and placing it on her breast.

I snatched my hand away, "Fucking hell, Jenna, this is NOT you!" I broke the knob and at the same time I fell out the door with Jenna who plummeted on top of me, the person in the room in front of the one I was in came out with someone on their arm.

"Ashley, Halsey, whatever you're name is, get off me! TYLER?!" My eyes turned wide, "Josh, I swear I can explain this, wait, is that the blue hair chick?! You bastard!" I pushed Jenna off and apologized to her before pulling Josh away from Ashley.

"You said you weren't going to fuck Jenna!" I pulled him down stairs, "You clearly have something going on with Ashley. Jenna is just drunk you ass hole." Josh pulled himself away from me, "I'm tired of your accusations, Tyler!" I glared at Josh as he talked to Brendon and was handed something.

He held a mic up to his mouth and spoke, "Hey everyone, I'm gay, that brown haired angel standing by the tv is my fucking slut and I'd appreciate it if you'd all stop trying to fuck him or me." He dropped the mic and everyone stood in shock.

That had to of been hard for him, he doesn't like being center of the attention it freaks him out too much. But not this time, he exerted confidence and stared me in the eyes the entire time he spoke. Brendon broke the silence by laughing over the word slut.

Everything went back to the same and Josh walked up to me holding out his hand, "Well? Star Buck's is down the street." I blushed thinking about Josh announcing that I was his slut and mostly how much more confident he is. I was taken out of my thought process so suddenly, by Josh. My back hit the wall and his tongue found its way into my mouth.

The shock of him even pulling something like this outside of our home was amazing. He grabbed my ass again and lifted me up. My arms wrapped around his neck, along with my legs around his waist. When I decided to take a moment to breathe, I moaned.

Josh went for my ear, licking and nibbling on it. "J-Josh, we can't do this right now," I squeaked out. Surprisingly he stopped, "We're finishing this at home and we aren't stopping for a few hours." I dropped to my feet and was pulled through the crowded room.

"Oh man, I almost forgot what the fresh air smelled like," Josh laughed out. I saw his point, Brendon's parties always smell like sweat, sex and alcohol. "Josh, are you drunk? You acted different and you taste like beer." Josh looked down at my hand and held it, "No, I did have a few drinks. I guess I just really don't like seeing Jenna half naked on top of you," he growled.

"She was drunk... Its not like I was going to do anything and I know you weren't going to do anything with Ashley, I heard you reject her." Josh hummed softly, "Most people would've taken the chance to sleep with her, she's pretty hard to get."

"Why would I do that if I have you and you're more than enough for me. God, it can't get any sexier than you and you're just so amazing, you treat me right even though you scare me sometimes... but I can't help but love it when you-" Josh was staring at me. His eyebrows were raised up along with a smile, "Do you even hear yourself right now?"

I looked down and smiled shyly, "S-Sorry, am I being weird and making things awkward again...?" Josh rolled his eyes and let go of my hand, "Yes, but I think it's really cute when you get carried away." His arm wrapped around my waist and he hugged me from the side.

Josh opened the door for me and I noticed his eyes adverted down. I shrugged it off and walked up to the counter, "One caramel latte and-" I looked over at Josh, he still had a smile on his face, "and a double mocha capicinno with extra whipped cream."

The guy didn't even ask for our names, there was only a few people there, already drinking there orders. Josh and I quietly waited for a while before I broke the silence,"So... Did I get it right?“ Josh nodded, "Perfectly, I've never even told you what I like."

"I steal sips off of you a lot."

"What?"

"Nothing."

After grabbing our coffees, Josh stared at my nose. "What are you looking at? Besides what I'm guessing is my ass every timeI turn around, don't think I don't notice that." Josh giggled, "Not my fault you chose tight jeans." A small kiss was pressed against my nose and then he licked his lips, "Whipped cream."

I fake pouted, "I wanted that, you jerk." Josh laughed, "Fine, want some of mine in return?" I shrugged and nodded my head. He dipped two fingers in his cup and raised his eyebrows at me. I blushed, grabbing his hand, I sucked on his fingers.

Josh froze and went wide eyed, "It was a joke, I didn't think you would do that." I awkwardly looked to the side, "Sorry." Josh wrapped his arm around my waist and proceeded to walk us home. Peaceful silence.

Every few minutes I'd take a glance at him, never truly understanding any of his intentions always took my interest. Josh is a sweet, caring person but is rough and extremely dominate in bed. He's also a perfect gentleman in front of someone else but alone he loves to be aggressive towards me.

I still can never understand him, he changes a lot.

"Hey Josh, do you love me?" I questioned. I felt the need to be reassured that I'm not just a favorited toy. "More than anything," he answered back. "Why do you ask? If you feel unloved by me, I can spend more time with you if you'd like."

Josh picked my cheek softly. "No, Josh, you understand I'm in love with you, right?" Josh stopped, he stopped in shock. There was a brief pause between us that actually scared me, "Like... In love with me no joke literally want to get married? Or heat of moment in love?“

One of those is a wrong answer and I know it. I shyed away blushing and kept walking towards our house. He grabbed my wrist and turned me back his way, "Tyler, we're going to talk about this here or at home." I wish I never spoke, I hate it when I speak my mind.

Josh opened the door for me and Riley ran out the door, good thing our yard was fenced in. I stepped inside and was quickly grabbed by my waist, Josh's chest pressed up against my back and his head laid on my shoulder. "Well? I'd like to know what way you meant," he spoke softly.

I sighed, "No joke I want to marry you.... Happy?" I looked down. I don't know if he was smiling or freaking out, no, I didn't want to look up and see the answer.

"I know it's crazy to love you and I don't really show my affection to you. Josh, I want to live a life with you," I sighed. "But I don't feel like I deserve you. If you didn't walk into my life that day... I don't think I would still want to live."

Of course, I heard footsteps come closer until I saw shoes. Warmth and protection embraced me. I gripped the red flannel from the side and heard him speak, "Don't say that, you deserve everything in the world and I'm going to give it to you."

I wondered how Josh would ever pull off that, "Josh, that's impossible... the world is too much." He pulled apart from me with his hand holding onto my shoulders and a cute little smile.

"Sure I can, by making you my world."

"Josh, do I still get one thing to do, since I did go to the party with you?"


	32. A/N Update soon?

I kinda want to keep going, but I don't know if I should .-.

There's been quite a few emails asking if it's over and if I can keep going. This is a Shitty story, I have no idea why you'd want more chapters. (Let's be honest, it's a cheesy story.)

I might continue soon though.


	33. Its never abuse it you like it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Basically Josh isn't so gentle and its a shit ton of roughness amd sex

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok wtf is wrong with me, why did I write this? But like, if Josh did this to me in reality I'd be okay with it oK BYe

NoI watched as Josh sat on the couch rubbing his head. "God, why do things always get crazy at Brendon's weekend house parties." I raised my eyebrow at the already exhausted Josh. "Anyways, what did you want? I did promise you I'd do one thing for you. What will it be? Something expensive?"

 

I shook my head, getting a confused face from my boyfriend. "Forget about it for tonight, we're both tired and it would just be even more tiring. Besides, I seriously can't get the Jenna thing out of my head."

 

I put my elbows on the kitchen table and held my head in my hands. "There's just a bunch of stress everywhere, Josh. Let's just go to bed." I heard a faint hum and shifting from the living room. "Well, stress is bad for you and so is thinking about Jenna so much." Josh responded in a dark tone.

 

"How is thinking about Jenna bad? I think about a lot of people, like Brendon and Dallon." I could hear footsteps getting closer, curiousity made me turn around and face Josh. He wasn't too happy with my word choice. "Because, I don't like it when you think about her instead of me."

 

I winced, Josh had grabbed the back of my hair and pulled my head back. He leaned towards my ear and whispered, "I'll make you think about me for weeks." I scoffed and averted my gaze to look down at him, he still kept my head pulled back and I really shouldn't enjoy any of this.

 

"Go fuck yourself, I want to go to bed." I muttered. "Oh you'll go to bed, after I take what I want from you." Thrown up against the wall by him, I groaned and was quickly pulled back up on my feet by Josh grabbing my throat.

 

I glared at him. "I hate you so much I could scream." His nailed dug into my neck just enough that it would hurt a little. "You're not fighting back and I know how kinky you really are. You love being my toy." He gave me a rough kiss, slipping his tongue in my mouth while unbuttoning my flannel.

 

I kissed back and easily used this moment to my advantage. I swept my leg under his and tripped him, smiling down at him like I had won. "Like you're getting anything tonight, sweetie. Goodnight."

 

I turned around and fell on my back. He tripped me by grabbing my pants leg. "Nice try, but you belong to me tonight." He held me down beneath him and bit my collarbone, drawing blood and licking the fresh wound. I blushed and let out a small moan. Maybe I really was a slut for Josh's sadistic side.

 

He left small butterfly kisses and a few bite marks and hickeys all over my neck and the exposed parts on my chest. As painful as it seemed, I found it pleasurable and moaned, grinding my hips against his and was stopped by Josh grabbing me up with him and yanking me down the hall and leaving my flannel behind.

 

I moaned again, harshly getting thrown and pinned against the bedroom door and him sucking on my bottom lip, nibbling on it. Unbuttoning and pulling down my pants to where my hip bones were exposed, he tightly held my hips while kissing me roughly again.

 

My hand went up and threw off his beanie and tugging at his shirt. Josh swiftly pulled it over his head and tossed it to the side. He opened the bedroom door and pushed us on top of the bed without breaking our third kiss. his hands entangled my hair; pulling my head to the side to leave more bites along my jaw and under my chin.

 

I rolled us over so I could be on top and Josh smirked, grabbing my hips and sitting up for me to straddle him. "So you want to ride today, hm? You're so innocent in public, but a slut with me." I was shifted on my back again and was struggling to keep Josh from pulling my pants off.

 

"Struggling so much only makes this better." I locked eyes with him for a moment, seeing the way more posssesive and devious side. "W-Why do you always do this?" My voice was small and weak, unable to raise it and tell Josh no.

 

Having the instinct to back away, I crawled backwards. My pants came off from Josh pulling them along with me crawling the opposite direction. His eyes flicked up to seductively gaze at me, grabbing a hold of my legs; he smiled.

 

I let out a shaky breath from Josh pulling me back beneath him. "J-Josh, could we p-please go to bed?" I asked in a more submissive tone then I had planned. "Well, what's this?" Running his hand across the smooth surface of my thigh, he grinned in a cocky way.

 

"Oh sweetheart, did you shave your legs and these," he gently brushed his thumb against the fabric of my brand new underwear. "Slutty Angel." He read off my underwear. "How nice of you to give me more reasons to fuck you even harder."

 

The underwear I bought weren't actually for men. I was wearing girl boxers.... i bought them specifically to surprise Josh with the 'Slutty Angel' part and they turned out to be really comfy.

 

Before I could register anything, Josh already had stripped to his boxers and was 

 

"God, I just want to rip those panties off you and show you what rough really feels like." A silent moment took place, I couldn't believe what was about to come out of my mouth. "Why not throw me against the wall and fuck me already?"

 

It was almost like a death sentence.

 

Wrapping my right leg around his biting on my lip, I watched Josh's face turn cold and bitter. Wrapping his hand around my throat and hooking his fingers in my waistband. "You asked why I do this earlier. I do it to leave you trembling and waiting for me to come home and fuck you."

 

I hated him, I hated him so much that it was impossible not to love him. Satisfying, sweet and bitter in the best way possible. I could never leave him, I needed him for everything. I've forgotten how to live without him. I needed this man more than anything. 

 

I looked at him for a split second, before locking my lips on his and getting that rush only Josh could give me. What was the point of resisting anymore? I was already turned on and shaking. I couldn't tell if the shakiness was from me being terrified of sadistic Josh, or just extremely turned on for him.

 

I reached my hand up, grabbing the wrist of the hand clenching my throat in such a pathetically weak manor that could only make Josh smirk. I dug my nails into his wrist hard enough to leave marks. He didn't like that.

 

Throwing my head back down on the bed he growled, looking at the marks I've left on him like it was sin. "For that, I'll make you suffer." I finally stood up for myself and pushed him off, gaining my pride back. I sat at the bed side, about to get up.

 

"Sweetheart, don't you know you're my toy? You'll let me handle you roughly and like it."

 

Arms tightly held me in a hold, keeping me on the bed. I moaned, feeling a bite on my shoulder and a small lick on my neck. "You sound satisfied, you should stop fighting and let me fuck you already. " surprisingly, I gave in easily. "A-Anything you say Josh, please touch me." I moaned with every lick he left.

 

Once again beneath him, he tugged my underwear down along with his, throwing them in what seemed like an endless clothes trail. "I don't feel like you've been punished enough, one last punishment and I'll be 'nice'."

 

I swallowed, realizing what the punishment was for leaving the wrong type of marks on his skin and not letting him have his way immediately. No lube, no preparation, nothing at all. This would hurt for a while before the pleasure, even at that... I'd feel it in the morning.

 

I looked up at my evil boyfriend with pleading eyes. He still had a heart, even if he was a complete and total sadistic demon at thw moment. "Josh, p-please?" I begged. I didn't want the excruciating pain, I like everything rough, but now that much.

 

He gave me a sympathetic smile, pecking my lips lovingly. "Too much? I'll save it for when your really, really bad." I cheered at his new choice and was shocked by how fast he could change from my sweet teddy bear, to a controlling sadistic man that I craved.

 

He leaned over to the side, pulling lube out from the nightstand. "Knees, I want that ass up, you slut." I blushed, doing exactly as she asked, I shivered at the feeling of cold lube coated on his cock being pressed against my entrance.

 

I bit my lip and was met with slight pain and pleasure from him starting roughly, without even a warning he let go all of his frustration and desire and pounded into me. "H-Hey that's too much, Josh. S-Slow down!" I moaned out. "Shut up and take it princess."

 

Fuck it felt good. The way he clawed my hips and said flithy words he'd never say to anyone else; Was everything I needed. "You have such a nice and tight little ass, princess." My dug my nails into the blankets, my body felt like it was on fire. Josh is an aggressive person but he never leaves me unsatisfied.

 

"Josh, oh fuck, fuck, fuck. I can't last much longer." I moaned loud enough the neighborhood could probably hear us. Josh only got more violent. Using one hand to force my head down on the its side against the pillow while he rocked himself back and forth harder than before.

 

My moans turned into cries and trembling. Sobbing over how fucking much pleasure he gave me. My legs and body shook before releasing over the used to be clean bedding. He suddenly stopped and pulled out.

 

Grabbing my hair and pulling me back on my knees. He turned me around and gave a menacing glare. "You look like a mess, too bad you're not done yet." He stood up and pushed my head towards his still hardened cock. "Better start sucking if you know what's good for you, princess. "

 

I obediently complied with his command and figured if I did a good enough job, I'd get rewarded. I grabbed the base and the first thing I did was take him in until I gagged. I felt it hitting my throat with every bob of my head and Josh loved it. His head flew back and he let out a moan.

 

Tears streamed down what I can only assume, reddened face. His hand pushed my head back and forth faster and deeper making me gag until salty liquid filled my mouth. He stepped back, panting with beads of sweat rolling down his forehead.

 

Josh lifted my chin up with his fingers. "My, my.... Did you get eniugh my little slut? I want to see you swallow it all." In one giant gulp, it all went down. "Good job. I think you deserve to lay down and let me take care of you."

 

There he went changing back to his caring ways.

 

Before I laid down, he changed the blankets for me and put my boxers on for me along with his own. He was sweet and gentle with me, cleaning off my chin with a warm rag and giving me little kisses. "Josh, you're a god. God damn do I love you."

 

He covered his blushing face with his hands and turned away. "Ty, stop, I'm supposed to make you feel all cute and warm, not the other way around." I giggled at his shyness and pulled the blankets on his side down.

 

"Josh, its cold in here, love me. I want cuddles."

 

Josh smiled, getting in bed with me and wrapping my smaller body with his. "You're so warm... I could hold you forever."

 

 


	34. The one where Tyler is clueless pt 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is really small update but I had to because HAPPY NEW YEARS BITCHES, i love you

As most of my mornings. I woke up without Josh next to me and nowhere in the room. "Great, hours of loneliness begins now." Except I wasn't alone. White fluff jumped on the bed and licked my face. "Rileeeey!" I hugged the puppy and scratched his ears.

I decided to get up. Looking to the side, I noticed an outfit laid out for me. I've never seen the outift before, it wasn't anything I kept in my closet. The little note caught my eye, it was just a simple piece of paper that was written delicately and curvy, obviously Josh's.

"Hey Riley, looks like your daddy wants me to be fancy today." I watched Riley run around on the bed and halt when he stared at me. I laughed and put on the dress pants, simple white button up with a black vest. I fixed the red bow tie around my collar.

I then proceeded to the bathroom to brush my teeth. After I did that, I noticed another note placed on the bathroom inner door.

'I want you nice and dressed up, looking your best when I come home. I'm not at work btw.'

I raised an eyebrow. I though he'd be in work today as usual, its Wednesday. I comb my hair back, gelling it a little and making sure it was fluffy, just as Josh liked it. Moving on, I reached the kitchen, breakfast was already made for me.

What was going on? Why was Josh being overly nice? Today wasn't like a holiday, it was a regular day. He must've felt bad for last night? But he didn't do anything wrong... I enjoyed myself as much as he did.

I blinked, unsure of everything. Another little note was beneath the glass of orange juice; 'I made breakfast for you, I'll be back soon with a little gift, love you.'

I sat down and ate breakfast. The bacon and eggs were still warm; he had to of left not too long ago. Riley begged and I caved, he was too cute to say no, so he lured me into giving him bacon.

The last place left is where I headed. I stepped into the living room and glared at the uninvited vistor sitting on my couch eating a bowl of the reeses puff cereal I bought for myself. "Oh! Morning, Ty, I let myself in as usual and took out your dog."

I stared at the unreasonably, scantily dressed Brendon. "How the hell did you get in here and why are you wearing boxers and a ripped shirt?" Brendon stood up and I could not take my eyes off the bulge in his boxers. Its not like I wanted to do anything with him, its more of the fact that its just right there on display.

My eyes were wide and unable to focus on his face. "If you're gonna be a thirsty hoe you might as well touch it first." Brendon winked. It was just a joke, easily told by his tone of voice and him patting my shoulder and walking past me.

"I don't know, maybe if I didn't have Josh in my life I would've. "

Brendon threw his bowl in the sink and looked at me with a smile. "Yeah? Well, that's ashame, I was hoping to have some fun with you." He walked up to me and touched my neck. My face expressed shock. "Wait, what?"

The burst of laughter came out and I stepped back. Brendon laughing his guts out and walking back to the living room. "I was kidding! You know I love Dallon. Besides, by the look of it; you might be a little too kinky for me." I blushed wildly. "How would you know?"

"Dude, your neck and jaw look like you were bitten and your probably in a shit ton of pain right now and hiding it."

He couldn't of been more right.

My back ached from being thrown against the wall, my ass couldn't of taken a better beating, my legs felt like hell and my entire body was covered up with bites and bruises from Josh's nails.

I didn't regret anything though, I fucking loved every second and would let him treat me like the slut I am for him anyday. I drooled while thinking about how well he does it all. I snapped out of my daze after Riley skid across the floor chasing a ball.

"Shit, don't tell anyone. Now explain why you're in my house half naked and looking like shit." Brendon walked towards the door. "Well, last night after you guys left, I got so many tequila shots with Dallon and some guys and had sex on your lawn with them all, okay? Eventually, everyone left and I passed out and woke up on your lawn and now I'm here."

I didn't even respond. 

"Well, I'll see you later!"

He ran out the door in his torn clothes and ripped shirt, bumping the figure in the door frame. "Whoa, okay. Ty, baby?" I exploded into excitement, wrapping my arms around his neck and kissing him. "I missed you so much!" Josh giggled and lifted me up.

Carrying me to the couch and having me sit down on it. "You were such a good boy last night, and can I say, you look so good, I knew you'd look sexy in that outfit. Best part is all those marks" My eyes fluttered, I felt heat rise to my cheeks. "I was going to cover them with concealer and foundation."

Luckily I remembered how Josh's sisters always helped with hiding hickeys with their make up often. "Oh? Well, I think they look nice on you. I brought you something." I raised my eyebrow at the small bag Josh had in his hand. 

"More clothes?" I asked in a curious manner. My face lit on fire, he pulled out a brand new collar. It was a light purple color, small spiked and diamond studded with a black, lacy edged, silk bow and words on it. My lips parted, whispering out the words, "Master's Kitten."

The buckle on it was golden and had smaller writing on it, particularly the words I Love You. "I had it custom made, I saved enough money to get it. It was pretty expensive but I don't regret buying it."

I blinked a couple times before taking it from him. Sure enough, it was real diamonds and gold. "Why would you buy me this? Its so expensive. Josh, you didn't have to, the old one was just fine." I bit my lip. He really went out of his way to buy me this and is paying our bills already....

"Because, my sweetie deserves only the best and highest of class for everything. You're the light of my life and your love is true and pure." He leaned towards me and kissed my cheek. "Ty, you know I'm always gonna spoil my kitten. Do you like it?"

I could barely express how I felt at this moment. "Like it? Josh, I'm in love with it! this is the best collar ever! Can I wear it right now?! Please, please, pleeease!" Okay I lied, I did express my feelings by begging and pulling him down on top of me. "Whoa, hey there. You can wear it, just calm down baby."

Josh stood himself back up and took off my bow tie. He took the collar from my hands and fixed it around my neck and adjusted it perfectly. "There, you look so cute. Why don't you go take a look, honey?" I nodded my head and ran for the bathroom mirror.

My fingers traced the small gems and smile at the words. Others would see this disturbingly inappropriate, but I found it romantic. It was beautiful. It clung around my neck perfectly.

"Wow, Josh has really changed your sex life. If it gets anymore kinky I want to join."

I snapped my head to the door frame. "Okay, you need to go home. I'm not down for a gay orgy with you, and for fuck sakes Brendon, how did you get in here again?" I shook my head. Brendon is so inconsiderate, flithy, perverted, fre-

"I'd invite Dallon, Ryan, Patrick, Pete and Josh to join. Besides, its fun. Oh, and the window was open so I invited myself in as usual."

At some point Brendon was even closer to me, looking at my reflection in the mirror. Well, at least he had clothes on, so he must've went home. My eyes went wide. Brendon was right behind me now. Wrapping his arms around my waist and his head on my shoulder.

"You look great in that collar, did Josh get it for you?"

My face heated up. I didn't have a voice, it left me. Not a second later did I hear a winner's laugh and Brendon falling against the door. My eyebrows furrowed, lips turning into a frown. I whirled around a snapped at him. "What the fuck is your problem?! Don't do that, fucking dick."

Brendon cocked his eyebrow up and smiled. "You know I'm just messing around. Honestly, I have hang over and I'm locked out of my apartment because Ryan locked me out and he's asleep."

I turned my head to look at the mirror again. "Your fault for drinking so much and sleeping around." The way Brendon laughed was almost evilly. "At least I know why Josh is being so nice to you. You forgot and that's the best part."


	35. A/N Read this though

OK WTF I'm 1 away from 300 kudos and I'm crying.

I'm make another special chapter at 300 and it'll be a smut filled sinners only chapter. But like, its going to be entirely different and doesn't take any place in this story.

I'm gonna make it like some teacher Josh x student Tyler or whatever I think of.

Any ideas though? I'm welcoming idea and requested side stories for a week.

Request can be commented or emailed at yukiisama3@gmail.com

But the next story has to be aan extremely kinky one if it's and idea 


	36. I'm sick ok A/N

WE REACHED 300 HOLY FUCK I LOVE YOU

I'll update as soon as I'm well, I'm currently sick and feel like dying I'm sorry... but hey next chapter is a smutty teacher!josh and student!Tyler thing so yay!


	37. Student x Teacher special chapter pt 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler has kept his secret for long enough. His admiration for his literature teacher as been kept at bay until his note and phone are given to the wrong person.
> 
> Josh is a 24 year old teacher with a strange liking for his best and most honorable student who he praises, 17 year old Tyler Robert Joseph. Accidents aren't the only thing catching his attention.
> 
> subtle hints and attention seeking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fuck this is a 2 parter cause I only did half while I was sick :/

I sat in the back if the class with my best friends; Brendon, Ryan, Dallon and Jenna. I liked music class the most, but Literature was by  _far_  my favorite for one reason. I barely spoke to him, he always said I was his favorite. I always did my best to never slip up.

 

"Shakespeare was the most fascinating writer of his and quite possibly still our generation as well. I'm sure you all know his most famous works, right, Joseph?"

 

I nodded my head. "Hamlet, Macbeth, Midsummer Night's Dream and Romeo and Juliet." I looked out the window, not paying attention to the teacher stopping beside my desk. The sound of someone's throat being cleared caught my attention and then I was facing that face I died every night to see.

 

"You're my brightest student. You're quite the respective young man. But I'd appreciate if you'd pay attention to me and stop day dreaming? Good boy."

 

I blinked at him. "Y-Yes sir, I'll pay more attention, Mr. Dun." My eyes locked with his soft brown ones. Everything about him was perfect. He smiled at me and moved on. He's my teacher, he's 24 and I'm almost 17.

 

I hated the way girls looked at him, flirting, talking to him constantly, doing anything for his attention and biting their lips and twirling their hair while practically drooling over him.

 

Who wouldn't? He was hot.

 

A note was dropped on my desk from Brendon that was labeled 'group chat'. I opened it under my desk so nobody would see it.

 

Brendon - Tyler has to be bangin' our teach.

 

Dallon - I'll be banging you soon tho ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

Ryan - Eww, dudes this is a group note chat not a private server.

 

Brendon - K but seriously tho like Tyler be thirsty for Josh.

 

I blushed. I started writing back and then I was halted by a voice. "Well, passing notes in class now are we? Give it to me." I swallowed harshly, I wrote something back I shouldn't of.

 

He had his hand held out for the note and I hesitated to hand it over. I was in so much trouble. If he read it I would get detention and it would be awkward talking to him anymore. 

 

My nervously watched him sit on his desk, cross-legged and reading the note. His eyes looked up at mine for a moment before he called us up. "Brendon Urie, Dallon Weekes, Ryan Ross, Tyler Joseph."

 

My heart stammered. Shit, he was going to call us to detention. I shouldn't of wrote back. Why didn't I just eat the paper?! Why couldn't I breathe correctly? Is he disgusted with me? Am I still his favorite?

 

Tyler - Maybe a little, I mean he is really attractive. I bet he has a girlfriend and stuff though.

 

"Brendon, Dallon, keep it safe and I'm not surprised about you two. I agree with you Ryan. Tyler, nice grammar," the low snicker from him made my stomach flip. "Good boy."

 

Good boy... the few words I loved to hear him say. I wonder what he thought about me now? He didn't send us to the principal at all. He flicked his eyes towards me and smiled before pacing around the student desks again.

 

"Does anyone know romeo and juliet's ages?"

 

Jenna shot her hand up and answered. "Juliet was 13 and romeo's was never specified." I sunk in my seat and watched him walk towards my desk again. "That's right Jenna, though they were kept apart; Age never seemed to matter."

 

He glanced at me for a second, lightly brushing his hand across my shoulder. "Juliet always has been my favorite. " My lip quivered. He was flirting in a way that wasn't obvious to everyone except me and probably Brendon.

 

As his hand slid off my shoulder; I purposely raised my hand and touched his. He looked back at me with a curious smile. Was that like us making a move? No, there's no way he'd like me like that.

 

As the bell rung and 7th period ended I was being eyed by my teacher. I ignored the staring and picked up my bag. Everyone rushed out, I was being held by my wrist so I wouldn't leave. "Huh? Mr. Dun?" I questioned. As the crowd of 19 other students left, I was trapped in a room with him.

 

My heart thumped against my chest wildly. "You forgot your homework binder." He let go of my wrist and raised his eyebrow with that goddamn smile. "Oh.... Thanks." I went ahead and grabbed my binder off my desk, I was ready to leave when I remembered my ride just left without me.

 

"Ah, dang it. Brendon isn't going to notice I'm gone for a while. Um, Josh? Could I use the library until then?" I'm the only student he gave permission to call him Josh out of class.

 

"Yeah, of course. I wouldn't of minded taking you home though." There was something in the way he said that, it was very reluctant. He seemed to easy at the little thankful smile I gave him. "That's okay, Brendon will get me soon."

 

I waved my hand and exited the classroom. I took a deep breath and got outside the library room and realized I left my phone in the classroom. I mumbled to myself and made my way back to the literature classroom.

 

I swear I felt my stomach drop and my face turn pale. As I saw inside the room through the window, Josh had my phone and had it unlocked. I didn't use a password during school so I could quickly open it and text my friends. 

 

The last app open was my kik chat with Brendon. The last text I sent was the bad part. I remembered texting how hot Josh is and how great of a teacher he is. Stupid me.

 

I opened the door and hid my nerve-racking emotions. "Hey that'd be my phone. Could I have it back?" I held my hand out for it and he didn't even budge. He cleared his throat and eyed my phone again. "Josh is so fucking hot in that suit. Did you see his sexy smile during the lecture? Duuude."

 

I clenched my jaw and swiped my hand towards my phone. To my surprise, Josh looped his arm around my back and pulled me onto his lap. "Mhh, you have quite a mouth on you. You didn't say please. Anyways.... Brendon, our teacher is like a god, I have no problem taking a lesson from him any day."

 

My lip quivered. I couldn't deal with this. I tried to pull back, but was met with a small kiss on my lips. "Don't even try. You're in trouble." 


	38. Special Chapter pt 2. "Yes, Sir."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fuck age restrictions 
> 
> contains name calling, Tyler mention sex with a friend and too much of Josh's dominance OKAY BYE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay I'm sorry I've been gone. I was busy with art classes and family issues.... I'M SORRY.

 

"I'm in trouble?" I nervously said. Josh hummed and turned my phone off. "Tyler, that's not what a good boy does... is it?" I squinted my eyes and kept us apart by blocking him with my hands pushing against his chest. "I'm only good in class. May I be excused now?"

 

His low chuckle gave me shivers. "No you may not. By the looks of it, you like me. A lot." He grabbed my chin and turned my head to the side. I let him kiss my neck softly. I didn't even tempt to rid him from myself.

 

Josh parted his lips from my neck. I stopped using my hands to keep us apart, laying them on his shoulders instead. "Sudden change in attitude?" His smile radiated with satisfaction. I grabbed my hips and pulled me closer on his lap to where I was pressed against him.

 

"Drop the act, Josh. I already know you're not this mannered out of class and what you really want."

 

His eyes flickered down for a moment, while the side of his mouth raised into a smirk. "You always were my smartest student." Seconds later, I was already in a heated kiss with him. His hands running over my body until it stopped rubbed against my inner thigh.

 

My impulse was to grab his hand and pull away from the kiss. "D-Don't touch there, I'm really sensitive." Not like he cared. He raised his eyebrow and latched his mouth onto my collarbone and started inching his hand further up my thigh. "I'm surprised you don't have a boyfriend, you're perfect."

 

I blushed. I finally got a shot with my teacher, I should take advantage of it, right?

 

I smiled and slid his suit off his shoulders. He gladly took it off and threw it to the side. "Sit on the desk for me." I got off his lap, sitting myself on his desk. "I, um... You're my teacher." I said under my shaky breath. "Isn't this wrong? We'll get caught."

 

Josh looked at me like I was stupid before chuckling and standing up to meet me at the desk. "Well," he bit his lip gently. "Are you going to tell on me?" His eyes glazed over the dark hickey on my neck, with that oh so lovely smile.

 

My eyes glanced to the side, unsure if this was in fact wrong and if he was just taking advantage of me. He lunged forward at trapped my ear between his teeth, giving a small tug and kissing the small flesh beneath my ear.

 

I bit back my moans and took a heavy breath. The air had a change in it, the air was more thick and filled with tension. "Y-You can't just take what you want, that's... not...." My voice slowly drifted into faint moans and whimpers. "Well?" His voice rung through my ears. "Are you going to tell?"

 

The closer I got to giving the right answer, the closer I was to a reward. "W-Well." I stuttered. He licked his bottom lip and place his hand back on my thigh. "No, I won't tell. Actually, please fuck me, Sir." I have no idea where my confidence began to boost, but I'm glad it did.

 

A little huff of air came out from his lips as his smirked. "I've heard you let someone else in your pants last week. Who was it? Was he your first? I bet you liked it." His tone had hinted at some jealousy, like he wasn't pleased with anyone else touching me.

 

My head fell to the side slightly. Confidence exerted from me, I felt like I could actually boss him around, but I know I can't. I blinked, grinning like I won a million dollars. "I did with Brendon, good friend. Yeah, he was my first and it was great." I sneered back. Eyes bored into mine suddenly.

 

Without any idea, he slapped me. The pain on my cheek caused me to whimper a little. "You let the classroom slut have sex with you? Flithy, you should be the new slut." I raised my eyebrows and held my cheek. "Then you should teach me a lesson and give your good boy private tutoring." 

 

Kisses from my jaw planted until he reached my mouth. "I bet you sucked him with those lips. Its had to bare that you're not my innocent student." Josh pulled away from me and sat back down on his chair, glaring at me like a piece of meat. "Do you want me?"

 

God, yes I wanted him. He's so fine and overall amazing. My feet hit the ground as I got up and onto my knees in front of him. "Maybe I do. Why should you care, Josh?" He instantly stood up and picked me up off the ground by my arm. "Because you should be mine and not be a slut with Brendon."

 

I rolled my eyes and smiled. "And its Sir, to you. Why the fuck are smiling?" He growled into my ear. I jumped up and wrapped my legs around his waist, causing him to fall back a little and lean against the chalk board. I pressed my lips against his which was accompanied by an approving hum from Josh. 

 

He licked my lip lightly. I opened my mouth and let his tongue slip in. I felt warm a pit of excitement in my stomach, I'd been craving this man for a whole year now. My eyes opened when he broke the kiss. "Show me exactly what you did with Brendon." The dominance in his voice made me shiver at his specific demand.

 

I slid down from his waist and was back on my feet. "W-well, why?" I questioned. "Because I ordered you to do so." I swallowed my pride and grabbed his hand. Leading him to his chair; he sat down. I bit the inside of my cheek and got on my knees. The moment I looked up at him he chuckled and patted my head. "Thought you were a saint."

 

He watched every move I made. Not taking his eyes off my hands that were taking off his pants. When I got his pants down and saw the bulged in his boxers; I blushed wildly. I pressed my tongue against the bulge through his boxers and looked up at him. His face was tinted pink while his mouth opened a bit.

 

I pulled his boxers down and smiled a little. The thought of Josh getting turned on over me was hard to believe, but made me happy. I licked a strip up his cock and lapped around the tip. Josh ran his hand through my hair and grabbed the little tuff of fluffed up hair. He pushed my head down. I bobbed my head up and down and gagged slightly, 

 

As much as I choked, I kept going. Josh's moans sounded pretty hot with his head back and eyes closed. Suddenly he pulled my head up by my hair and forced me to look at him. "Clothes off." I did as he said and took off everything. Josh was about to get up, but I stopped him. "Stay there. Do you have anything...?"

 

Josh took the hint and turned his head to his pants. I took out his wallet and found a condom in it. I smiled and ripped it open. He raised his eyebrow, watching me roll it over his cock. "What are you planning?" I didn't say a word, instead I got on his lap and slowly lowered myself. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I quiently moaned out Josh.

 

I did expect him to do the same back. He grabbed my waist and rolled my hips against him. I buried my head into the nape of his neck and moaned softly. "Does that feel good babe?" Josh asked. I hummed it response. I lifted myself up and began to bounce on him. The moans from Josh were loud enough for me to hear.

 

The moment Josh lifted me up and laid me on my back on his desk did I learn what real pleasure was. I never took him as a gentle giver nor an extremely rough person, instead he was a perfect combination of both.

 

I bit my finger trying not to let out a loud moan while Josh gradually became faster and pounded harder. He hit my sweet spot and nearly made me scream. "You look so hot like that." He growled. My body felt hot and ready to burst. He leaned down and started biting and sucking on my neck lightly.

 

I let out what sounded like a small cry and a few whimpers. Before I could register anything, I released all over mine and his stomach. Josh's thrust became sloppy until he eventually stopped and pulled out.

 

I laid on the desk catching my breath as Josh disposed of the condom. "You did good, Tyler." I got up and began putting my clothes back on along with Josh. "Thanks." I answered back. I was sure this was just a sexually frustrated literature teacher looking for an easy way of relief and now has no use for me.

 

Josh furrowed his eyebrows at me. "Is something wrong?" He questioned. "Nope." Was all I said. I picked up my backpack and was ready to go. As I got to the door, Josh halted me. "Hold on, come back here." I once again, did as he said and came back to him. "Yes, sir?"

 

My eyes widened. Josh pressed his lips against mine again and slipped his tongue in. His hand cupped my cheek diligently. He clearly meant this to be a sweet kiss. As he pulled away he smiled at me. "Just so you know, I didn't use you. You're still my favorite and I do like you. You're dismissed."

 

I returned the smile and hugged him. "I like you too, Sir."

 

 

 

 

The next Monday morning after last Friday, I was back in Mr. Dun's classroom. A lot of girls gave me a dirty look, they knew I was his favorite but had no idea how much of his favorite I really was. The second I sat down next to my friends, Josh was already looking at me from his desk. I felt awkward, we had sex and what if everything he said meant nothing...?

 

My thoughts were cut out by my teacher licking his lips and walking over to me. I sunk down a bit, unsure of what was to come and if it was good or bad. He laid his hand on my shoulder again, just like last Friday and whispered to me with a smirk. "See you after class, Tyler." I smile and whispered back something simple. "Yes, Sir."

 

A little piece of paper dropped onto my desk. I unfolded it and smiled at the words. 

 

Tight jeans today? Are you trying to get my attention? - Josh

 

In the corner was his phone number and I blushed. Josh was interested in me and my birthday is soon, I'd be 18 and Josh knew that. From across the room, Josh nervously looked at me; as if he was scared I'd say no.

 

I nodded my head at him and saw him smile again.

 

At the end of the day I was once again held back while the other students left. Josh kissed me and grabbed my hands. "When you turn 18 next month I'll take you out on a real date. I promise." With that he hugged me and kissed my forehead.

 

This was going to be one hell of a month to go by and then a year to remember.


	39. A/N + Mini side story

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> READ ONLY IF YOU GIVE A FUCK OR WANT TO KNOW MY ABSENCE:
> 
> Holy fuck my dudes. There WILL be a chapter update soon I promise, hopefully before March 1st.
> 
> I've been gone cause I got a job in December right? That takes like 4 hours a day and I also have school too. I was writing stuff even with that going on but then my Grandpa had an incident and I'm helping out everyday which takes half my day and by the time I'm home I'm too tired.
> 
> I'm sorry for my absence and I'll still be gone every now and then But I wouldn't close the story off without telling you guys!
> 
> Also I'm working on a one chapter Ryden story.
> 
> Okay I'm done, I'm gonna go dye my hair and shower now.
> 
> Love you, my fabulous dudes. NOW TO THE MINI SIDE STORY

This side story chapter is longer than the others, mainly to make up for the fact I've been gone. Okay? Okay.

 

* * *

 

 

The glory of having a dominant slightly sadistic boyfriend who gets off on punishing me; Also happens to be  _different_  outside of the bedroom.

 

Josh and I had been frequently getting mad at each other for barely any reasons and it would end up twisted. Right now, Josh was holding me down on the floor., trying to regain his place as my  _Master_. I, on other hand, wasn't too kind and bit his forearm. He flinched, getting off of me and looking at the small bite mark. "What the fuck? Tyler!" Josh whined. I honestly didn't mean to go far enough to bite him. "What? You bite me all the time!" I yelled back in aggravation. Josh gave me an apologetic look and rubbed his arm. "Does it really hurt that bad when I do it to you?" That question caught me off guard. My face sunk from being mad, to sympathetic. My knowledge of Josh for the past years, is how vulnerable and upset he gets when he feels like he did something actually wrong to someone.

 

I scooted over towards him, holding him and softly petting his hair. "Josh, babe, you're not hurting me. I promise." I forgot all about how Josh was 5 seconds from exploding and possibly slapping me earlier. "What about how mean I am to you? I treat you like garbage." Josh's voice was starting to get small and cracked a few times. "Don't say that. You treat me the way I like it. You're never really mean without apologizing. Besides," I cuddled myself between his legs, "you know how much it drives me crazy when you're like that." Josh buried his head in the nape of my neck. "I know, I just don't want to abuse you in anyway."

 

I let the smallest giggle out. Josh seemed fine again. Then I felt the most gentle, barely even a scrap against my neck. I knew it was Josh's teeth. It felt oddly sensual. My spine shivered along with the small noise I've never even heard from myself come out. "That felt nice." I quietly responded. Josh stopped and rested his head on my shoulder as I continued to lovingly pet his hair. "Why were we fighting again? Mh, forget it. I just kinda want to go have-" Josh shot his head up, ready for that last word. I didn't get around to say it because of a interruption.

 

"Why are you two cuddling on the floor? Perfectly good couch right there. Lazy fuckers."

 

I first hand experienced Josh's gleaming eyes just shatter over Brendon being a usual cock block. I pushed Josh away and made distance between us. How embarrassing.... I gestured towards the couch and tried playing it off. "You can sit down if you'd like." Brendon raised his eyebrows and shook his head. ""Hell no! You guys have probably fucked on that couch and possibly the floor too!"

 

The really bad part was how he wasn't wrong. 

 

"You forgot the table and shower too." Josh intervened. I hid my face in my hands and felt a kiss pressed against my head. Josh scooted himself next to me apparently. Brendon left speechlessly. "Tyler, I love youuu." Josh cooed. "I love you too you big jerk." I mumbled. "So, what were you saying?" Josh pressed on. I laughed and gave him the truth. "I was gonna say that I wanted to have sex, but that kind of died off. I'm not feeling it anymore, babe." I stood up, walking towards the kitchen with Josh following right behind me. "Oh come on! Just a little bit? Can I at least have a blow job?" Josh whined. I snorted and shook my head. "Josh, you're an absolute sweetie and cuddly, but that's not happening hun. I'm out of the mood after Brendon came by. Do you want take out for dinner?"

 

Josh stopped his whining and had the most serious voice. "What if I got you back into the mood?" I chuckled at his voice and words. I never really take him seriously. Before I could protest some more; I was already whirled around, getting nipped on my neck and ear. "Cut it out, Joshua." I half moaned. He began teasing my sweet spot with his tongue and teeth ever so lightly. "Josh, I said no." I nearly melted. His stubble rubbed against my sensitive skin. My hand grabbed the back of his hair, pushing him towards me even more. I hated to say he'd easily gotten me aroused again. "Josh, m-more. I moaned.

 

Josh picked me up bridal style and began carrying me to our room. "After this was cuddle and order a pizza and watch movies."

 

I couldn't ask for a more perfect relationship than the one with Josh.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got a new computer so no more hassles of going to a library to update.*downloads writing notebook*
> 
> I got the floral kimono and glasses Tyler wears on stage off Amazon today.


	40. Meow Meow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kitten play has been involved okay? OKAY.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> creative titled I know.

I sat back on the couch waiting on Josh and apparently now Brendon. _Why was he even going? Is this like some kind of romantic thing featuring Brendon?_ I shuddered at the thought that Brendon might've actually talked Josh into a threesome, or possibly an orgy. When Josh came back into the living room with Brendon who had changed his clothes into a very dramatic suit. "Why does Brendon have to go? He's mean to me, Jooosh." I groaned.

Josh grabbed my hand and pulled me up. "Because, he's part of tonight. So is Dallon and Jenna." _Foursome, its a foursome_. I glared at him. I'd willing do stuff with Josh and if I was single and failing life, Brendon. I could see Brendon wiggling his eyebrows and smiling. "Ready to go?" (pun intended) Brendon asked. Josh raised his eyebrows towards me, and all I could do was nervously swallow and reluctantly nod my head.

Walking to the car, Josh whispered in my ear, "why are you so nervous, babe?" I just glanced at him before getting in the backseat. Brendon looked at me from the passenger seat. "What is it, bren?" I muttered. "You could of sat up front with Josh. I wouldn't of minded back seating, dude." I shook my head and turned my attention to the window. Of course, Josh knowing how I am, had to ask me what's wrong.

I didn't say a word. He must've shrugged it off as one of my deep thought moments. I guess you could say I felt a sense of guilt towards myself for not doing anything in return for Josh's kindness. Its like being pampered and then taking it for granted, yet, I never do take anything he does for granted because how could I? Its Josh.

I could hear Brendon talking to Josh, making simple small talk. I felt like they were hiding something from me. Josh had refused furiously, that I shouldn't know what was going on; Brendon agreed with him. I managed to tear my eyes away from the window to make eye contact with Josh in the rear view mirror. More guilt piled in me. Josh looked concerned. I broke the contact by looking down.

Maybe its the frown on my face, or the gloomy look in my eyes that gave away my thoughts to him. "Josh, where are we going?" I asked once more. "To pick up Dallon," Brendon interjected. _Oh great, more people_. "Ah." I noticed Josh checking on me every few minutes in the mirror. I faked a smile, just to please him. Still, Josh knew me, mentally and psychically.

Once the car stopped and a buckle clicked, Brendon was gone. I raised my head to see him walking towards his, Ryan and Dallon's, apartment. This was the moment Josh unbuckled his seatbelt and got in the backseat with me. "Tyler?" He whimpered, "what's the matter? You look upset." I smiled weakly. I'd hate to make Josh sad because of my own feelings. "Nothing, I'm just thinking." Unsatisfied with my pitiful answer, he held my hand.

"You know you can tell me anything. Is someone hurting you?" Suddenly, Josh was glaring in hatred, "no promises that I wouldn't kill them. Nobody can hurt my Tyler." I snorted at his oddly, kind words. "So then you're going to kill yourself?" I rubbed a small bit of make up off my neck, revealing one of his own bite marks. "You did _this_ to me, jerk."

His little giggle gave me life. His smile was the best thing this world has ever seen, and his hair was wild, but cotton candy. His fit of giggles ended shortly, "seriously, what's wrong with you? You know I hate it when my kitten is upset." I opened my mouth to speak, but cut off by the doors opening and closing.

"hellooo, fuckers."

I snorted at Brendon's beautiful way of saying "Hello". "Really? Brendon, Where are your manners?" Dallon groaned. Now Brendon was driving. "I'm sorry, you told me to leave my manners in our bedroom last night. I guess I forgot them and learned what you taught me instead." My eyebrows raised. Brendon in a car with his... Boyfriend, friends with benefits, friend, uh guy? Was always trouble. I can never tell if they were dating or just sex addicts with each other.

_Now that I think about it, what about Ryan? Is that like a threesome? Or does Ryan just let them do it while he stays in his room horrified? Poor Ryan. He's too sweet and gentle for them, at least I think. He might be a kinky bi-_

"Tyler, what's with that face you're making?" Josh laughed. "Huh? What face?" I smiled at the bright pink haired man. He was so cute. His eyes rolled back with his head tilted up, laughing like it was the best day ever. These were the moments I could smile and look at him in pure bliss. "Your laugh is so cute." I thoughtlessly said. Josh's laughter abruptly stopped.

I just looked at his face turn a tinted pink until he covered his face in his hands. Then I remembered, I never compliment him with words, usually mentally. I made him blush. "T-Thanks, Ty." The car stopped again and Brendon looked at us. "Could your cute moment stop? We're here ya sluts." I looked up and screamed mentally.

Josh brought me to a Celine Dion concert.

"Josh." I lowly said. My voice must've scared everyone enough that Brendon got out, Dallon sharply inhaled while Josh was pushing his back against the car door. "You said he liked Celine Dion!" Dallon whisper screamed. I didn't look back up. Clenching my fist I growled at Dallon, "could you give me and my boyfriend a minute? Thanks, we'll meet you inside." Dallon got out quickly and took off for Brendon, wishing Josh good luck.

"Josh...." I repeated again. I didn't get anything in response for a very silent moment. "Y-Yeah?" Josh quietly said. I unbuckled my seatbelt and jumped onto him, squeezing him tightly. "Thank you so much! I love you! Thank you, thank you, thank you!" I screamed. Josh wasn't tense anymore. "I thought you were mad for a second."

I then wrapped my arms around his neck and kiss him. He smiled into the kiss before pushing me down onto the car seat with him on top. "We can't do that here." My voice was shaky and nervous at the same time. Then it happened. Josh kissed my nose, and with the biggest smile he said, "I know you forgot but that's fine, you're stressed a lot and please don't feel guilty for forgetting because its honestly okay. Happy one year anniversary."

My heart stopped for a second before beating so fast I could feel it. "Wait, today's our... Oh my god! How could I be so stupid! Josh, I-" Josh shut me up with a kiss and gave me a reassuring smile. "I said its okay. I don't need a present, Just having you is the best gift ever." I pushed lightly against Josh's chest. "Shouldn't we get inside?" I mumbled. Josh softly smiled in return.

  
Moments later, my gloomy look seemed to vanish. Inside the overly packed area, I saw a woman run toward us. "Josh! Hurry up already, Dallon and Brendon are waiting for you," she said sassily. I raised my eyebrow at the blonde. "Jenna." I flatly stated. She wasn't excited either. "Tyler." Jenna flatly said back. I looked over to my side and nearly lost my blank composure due to Josh's awkward look.

"Uh, glad to see you guys not bashing each other... yet."

Jenna and I, don't hate each other anymore, Its just a fun sarcastic war. Any time I said something she didn't like, she was ready to verbally fight me and its just great. Though I knew how to win against her while at the same time getting Josh riled up at the same time. Best of both worlds for me.

I smiled slighting and it caught Jenna's attention. "What's with that look?" She growled in annoyance. Then I looked up and softly said, "just thinking about you." Wasn't a lie, I was in fact thinking of how to plan this out and she is part of it. "E-Excuse you?!" She blushed a shade of pink and gave me the most confused look.

Josh on the other hand.... At first his eyes widened in shock, then he glared at me. He made a questionable sound of displeasure. "Hey, if you still want to, we can get coffee together like you asked about when we met." I suggested. Jenna's face exploded into red as she covered her mouth with her hand. She nodded her head slowly.

Beside me was still Josh. He exhaled out of nose audibly like an angry bull. "Tyler," he grabbed my arm harshly, "let's go get our seat. Wouldn't want you to miss the concert, babe." He dragged out those last words with pure anger and annoyance coating his voice. "Bye, Jenna!" I yelled as I got dragged away by Josh.

He didn't let go or loosen his grip at all, actually, he tightened his grip and pulled me even more away from her. "Josh, you're hurting me." Josh didn't care, Josh was busy being jealous like I wanted. "Jooosh!" I whined. The most I got was a grunt and then forced into my seat between him and Brendon.

"Hey, what's with Mr. Grumpy Pants over there? He looks annoyed." Brendon asked. I shifted towards Brendon rather than pissed off Josh. "Actually, I think he's Mr. Dun with your shit, right now." I whispered. Brendon snorted and patted my leg. This was a friendly gesture for sure because I've seen his moves on Dallon which were way more lewd. Even at that, Josh took it 'That' way.

Josh bit his inner cheek. "Brendon, don't touch him. I want him untouched and all to myself later." I rolled my eyes purposely, just for the sake of not getting caught. "What makes you think I'll do what you say?" I retorted. Josh glared at me even more, he was stabbing me with his eyes. "Because you know I'll fuck you up 10 times worse if you don't."

Brendon raised his eyebrows and smiled. "Kinky anniversary." Then Jenna took her seat next to Dallon. "Jenna." I stated with more excitement than last time. "T-Tyler." Jenna said back blushing again. Josh huffed a breath out. He wasn't enjoying himself yet.

The second Celine Dion got on stage, I couldn't take my eyes off of her. She had the moment beautiful voice I had ever heard. God, did I love her music. My mind fixated on her for so long I didn't catch what Josh and Dallon said to each other. I heard Josh say something along the lins of shopping for something and that's it. But who cares? Celine Dion.

During a short break when Celine went backstage, Josh stood up. "I'm going to the bathroom." And so he did. I looked over at Dallon who was holding hands with Brendon. It's our anniversary and he's pissed enough to not even touch me in a loving way. I bet Josh is still mad at me for barely flirting with Jenna and its been nearly an hour. "Why is Josh mad at me?" I asked. I knew why, but I still didn't want to get caught by even Brendon.

Brendon wiggled his eyebrows at me. What does that even mean? Brendon is so fucking stupid sometimes. Jenna couldn't even make eye contact with me. Her lip would quiver when I'd try to ask her something and she'd look off to the side.

This is when I started getting worried. Josh didn't come back during and after the concert. It ended and Josh was just gone. What have I done?! I mentally freaked out but maintained a happy face. Josh was gone and it's my fault! I did this on our day and not to mention how sweet he's been to me all day and I forgot today was our anniversary. I'm a terrible boyfriend who doesn't deserve Josh's love and attention.

Soon my face was turning into full blown panic and worry. I frantically looked around the large, exiting crowd for Josh. I saw pink fluff in the crowd and ran for it. It was Josh coming back. I hugged him tightly. "Josh!" I sobbed. Josh didn't hug me back, though he did at least lean his head towards mine. He didn't say a word.

The car ride to drop Brendon, Dallon and Jenna off, was loud and full of laughter. But Josh was super quiet and so was I. I hated being right next to him in the passenger seat with nothing but awkward silence. When we were on our way home together, I sat there half ashamed of myself and half excited.

Josh parked the car and got out, not even looking at me. He opened the door with me following behind. "Josh, why are you being an ass?" I questioned. He sat on the couch and finally, looked at me. "Why are you flirting with Jenna?" He questioned back. I rolled my eyes, still standing in the doorway. "Tyler, come here."

I shrugged and walked up to him, kneeling down in front of him. "Even height, even way to kick your ass, Josh." Before I could flinch, Josh had already had his hand on my neck. Josh leaned in close to my ear and whispered, "I don't know if I should fuck you, or beat you for what you did." I laughed at his attempt. "I'd enjoy both."

I smiled when he threw me down on the carpet. "I hate how much you turn me on and make me want to kill you at the same time." I giggled at his words. "I'm going to go take a short shower. Let Riley out and I'll make it up to you by doing anything you want tonight, okay?" I saw his face light up before I went to our bathroom.

By short shower, I meant I took my sweet time and probably made him slightly more agitated then he already was. When I got out, I had only my boxers and sweatpants on. Walking to the living room, I noticed Josh had a bag out. "I took out Riley and he's asleep in his crate. Now, your turn to make it up." He said while pushing the bag towards me.

Well this was easy, I just had to wear clothes. He ushered me into the bathroom, which I happily obliged. I didn't expect Josh to buy something like this without telling me. I've done it once before. My jaw dropped. Kitten play. Josh actually wanted to do kitten play.

I was embarrassed. fluffy clip on kitten ears, fur bracelets, fluffy tail, half-cut, black shirt rimmed with cotton, and possibly the most comfortable pants I've ever worn. The last thing I had to wear was the collar Josh bought me earlier. I looked like a sex slave or a overly feminine guy.

I took a deep breath and walked out. Bowing my head in shame in front of Josh. "Look at me, kitten." I hesitated to look at Josh. Out of everything we've done, this was by far the most my most embarrassing and unproud moment. "Oh my fucking god, yes." Josh stood up quickly, pinning me against the wall and shoving his tongue between my lips.

I didn't know how to react, Josh was most likely going to ravage me and make me sore again because of this outfit. But his hands, they were so soft and gently touching my body. His lips moved in synch with mine perfectly. He pulled away from me and bit my shoulder. "I need you right now, you look so damn hot, kitten." I was picked up so easily and quickly brought into the bedroom, laid down beneath him.

Josh's lips connected to my neck, trailing kisses and licks down it. "Joshua, s-slow down." I squeaked in surprise, having Josh rip the shirt off. He was unusually impatient. "Kittens can't talk, they meow and beg." I squinted my eyes, not sure if he expected me to meow for him. "This is a joke right?" I shyly asked. I'm not meowing, this was already embarrassing, even if it's just Josh here.

My face reddened, Josh was staring down at me. He was serious with the entire situation. He didn't touch me anymore, he was waiting for me to meow. "Come on, doesn't it sound nice to try new things in bed together? Besides, you make a sexy kitten." I thought it over for a moment. Josh was right and he did seem to really enjoy this.

"M-Meow..."

"Not good enough."

I glared at him. He knows damn well how much I want him. "Don't make me do this, Josh, its so embarrassing." Josh merely raised his eyebrows and stood up. He was seriously going to leave me. I jumped up off the bed and got on my knees in front of him. "Please master? Meow." I gazed up at him, blushing crazily. Though I was a lot more comfortable seeing Josh brightly smile and tell me, "good, kitten."

I licked my lips, looking back and forth from Josh's eyes and the bulge in his dress pants. He patted my head and allowed me to unzip his pants and pull them down. My tongue pressed against his boxers, softly licking through the fabric. "A-Are you just going to lick it?" Josh heavily breathed. He wants a kitten then he gets a kitten.

Pulling his boxers down, I started licking all over his cock. lapping up precum and looking up at him through my eyelashes. I loved that face, the perfectly pleased face Josh does every time. I pulled away in shock. Josh already came. "Well damn, that was really quick. Now I'm just not satisfied." Josh was more embarrassed than I am wearing this outfit.

I smiled, licking the small bit of salty liquid on the corner of my mouth. "Was it that good, Josh?" I asked in my most innocent voice. Josh blushed and nodded his head. "Josh, its okay really," I trailed off, "I'm sure you'd gladly be finished with me later."

Later when I left to the couch, not bothering to change my clothes because who cares? Josh joined me soon enough and still was flushed red. "Are you really that embarrassed just because you didn't last your average?" I lazily leaned into his arm. "Its just the kitten thing, do you have to still wear it even now?" Josh's voice was shaky.

My fingers traced my own arm tattoos. "To be fair you kinded destroyed the shirt and I'm not changing my clothed any time soon until you give me what I want."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wHY ARE YOU WAsting YOUR TIME rEADING THIS?!!?


	41. A/N + Mini side story

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A moment for me to scream at you guys in a good way. Also a shit story that isn't thought out because I just now thought of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I JUST NOTICED PEOPLE BOOKMARKED THIS SHIT STORY. HOLY FUCK. I WILL HUG YOU. ACTUALLY IF YOU'RE SOMEONE READING THIS EVEN IF YOU'RE RANDOM, FUCK YOUR PERSONAL SPACE BUBBLE. HUGGED.
> 
> Why am I excited? Because I'm an amateur writer that real people take time to read a probably soon over 100 chapter story that has no plot whatsoever and is basically just gay and random. You have no life. I respect that. (I don't have one either...) We're instantly friend now. My Kik is... KittyRawrXDMySpaceUserlawl
> 
> I'm kidding it's just a prank bro. 

"Josh."

"..."

"Jooosh."

"..."

"Jishhhh! Joshie! Jishwa! Josh! Jash! Joshua! Jeeersh!"

I've been trying for like, an hour on getting Josh's attention. Josh is being petty and not paying attention to me because I accidentally slipped up and called him Jenna. Regrets have been made.

"Josh!" I whined more, "Hey, Hey, Josh. Stop being an Ass. I said I was sorry." It was like I wasn't even there. Many failed attempts later, I jumped up on his lap and glared in his soul. "I have needs, and one of those needs is attention you bastard." Still, Josh did nothing. "Fine, be that way, I apologized and offered to cook tonight, but if you wanna be that way," I took out my phone, "I'll call Jenna and Brandon."

 

The moment I got off and turned my back, arms reached out around my waist and pulled me between legs. I looked up from being cuddled into his warm body and noticed how his eyebrows slightly furrowed and his small frown. My classic jealous Josh.

"Jenna pays attention to me."

I raised my eyebrows and smiled because I know Josh would break.

"Fine, here's your attention you demon."

Josh wrapped his arms around my chest and shoulders, still having me sit between his legs, my back cuddled against his chest while he buried his face in my shoulder. "I hate you, Tyler. You're so petty over attention." I smiled at his barely serious words and cuddled myself more into Josh's body.

 

"I can hear you trying not to laugh in your voice. And be lucky, I'm only petty for you, also I love you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seriously, I love you because you read this junk.


	42. ~insert some clever title Lenny face~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fml, I was listening to a song and then BAM. I need to listen to less porn like music its giving ideas lmao

Josh and I stayed up together. He knew very well he had work tomorrow morning, even with that he decided to stay up with me. My eyes fixated on the clock for a moment, clearly reading 11:26pm. Soon it would be the next day and not our anniversary.

I shifted towards Josh more. Neither of us were heavy with drinking but Josh didn't mind drinking a few with me tonight. I still had on that ridiculous kitten cosplay, minus the short Josh ripped off me.

"Josh that's your second bottle, slow down or you'll get too drunk and have a hangover tomorrow." I was trying not to get him fired but not ruin his fun at the same time. "Its fine, don't worry about it." Josh insisted. I stiffened, Josh wrapped his arm around my shoulders. I wasn't sure if he was already drunk or not.

"Dude, you better not be pulling some drunken flirting right now." I scoffed. Josh laughed, "I'm a little tipsy, but I know what I'm doing." I growled at his words. I'm not even sure how or why I'm still interested in him, he doesn't listen to me when necessary. "Josh, I hate you."

"Then what are we? You wouldn't be here if you really did. If you weren't here I'd be chasing after you still." He locked eyes with me. Its impossible to resist his eyes, they're always so welcoming and warm. "I'd be chasing after someone like Brendon instead of you." I teased.

Josh surprisingly, went straight for it and started kissing me. I pulled away instantly, only to be pulled back into it. This time I let it happen, letting Josh put his hands wherever he desired.  It wasn't long before Josh got up from the couch. Grabbing my arm, he pulled me into our bedroom.

Josh was already tugging down my pants before removing his own clothes. Though he wanted me on the bed, I pushed him down onto the edge, deciding I didn't need permission to straddle him. Heavy kisses were followed by him biting my shoulder and grabbing my bottom. I moaned very quietly, leaving Josh unsatisfied.

He slid his hand up my side, kissing my neck and jaw line. My eyes rolled back in pleasure. I lunged forward, taking Josh down on his back. I leaned down and kissed him again, grabbing a hold of his shoulders. Josh dragging his nails against my back, reaching up to my hair and grabbing a fist full.

He bucked his hips against mine, getting friction between us. Josh rolled us over, taking his place as dominant. I moaned loudly, his hand held my throat, while his lips moved against my neck. I moved my hands towards his body, only having them grabbed and pinned above my head.

I leaned my head up, quickly snatching his earlobe between my teeth before he could react. A small moan escaped him. His grip weakened just enough for me to break my hands free and latch them in his hair, pulling him down towards me enough to suck on his neck. I easily found his soft spot, abusing it until I finally heard Josh moan.

I stopped and shared a look with Josh for a moment. Neither of us used any words, it was only instinct. Josh's hands slowly pulled off my boxers, taking his own after mine. I watched him grabbed lube from off our nightstand, coating his cock. I bit my lip, taking a bold move and getting myself back on top.

His breath hitched, knowing what was happening. I softly placed my hands on his chest, lowering myself on top of him. Josh growled, grabbing my hips. I moaned, slowly bouncing on him. I began going faster, steadying my pace to match Josh bucking his hips up.

My nails dug into his chest with every moan. I felt my release accompanied by Josh's. I huffed out one last breath, hanging my head down low. I rolled off him and listened to the sound of Josh getting up to clean himself off. I reached for my boxers, tugging them on and walking back into the kitchen to grab the remaining beer I had left and drinking it.

I jumped slightly at the feeling of arms wrapping around my waist. "You still love me right? Like, you didn't mean that you actually hate me?" Josh sounded concern. I grinned and turned myself around in his arms. "No, I didn't mean it at all. I still love you lots." Josh sighed in relief. I turned around and jumped on his, wrapping my legs around his waist. "I'm tired and starting to feel drunk now...." I complained. Josh easily carried me back to our room and laid me down.

"You did really well tonight, I should take you out to eat tomorrow or something." Josh smiled, pulling blankets over us. "Really, Josh? That sounds nice, but watching movies like usual is also great." I truthfully said. "Yeah, but sometimes you deserve to be spoiled." Josh leaned over and kissed my cheek sweetly.

I rolled on top of him, hugging his waist, laying my head on his stomach while my lower body was between his legs. Josh didn't mind, he smiled and put his hand on my head, caressing my messy hair. Soothed by Josh running his fingers through my hair, I looked up at him. "What?" He asked reluctantly. "Nothing," I said, "I was just thinking how cute you are right after you know... That stuff...." I blushed.

Josh smiled, giving me his tired yet happy face. "Maybe its 'cause every time after, you look like a fluffy haired bunny to me." Josh giggled. He was so sweet and adorable, you'd never believe he was a slightly sadistic, master, dominant person. I buried myself in his tummy and slowly faded into peaceful sleep.


End file.
